I thought being skinny would save me

If you've ever looked in the mirror and felt disconnected from the person staring back… or found yourself using food, control, or restriction to cope with emotions you didn't know how to process, this episode is for you.

In this raw, unfiltered solo episode, KB opens up about something she's kept close for a long time: her complicated relationship with her body. From comparing herself to her gymnast sisters as a kid, to squeezing into a competition swimsuit that tore at a league meet, to running away to Thailand after an abusive relationship, this is the story of a girl who used food to cope, control, and survive.

This isn't a clinical conversation about eating disorders. It's a deeply personal account of disordered eating, body dysmorphia, and the slow, ongoing work of learning to respect yourself, not punish yourself.

You’ll discover:

• How childhood chaos and emotional dysregulation shaped KB's earliest relationship with food
• The difference between self-punishment and self-respect at the table
• Why restriction, bingeing, and over-exercising are all rooted in the same wound
• What it looks like to build structure around food and movement from a place of healing, not fear
• Why KB is done hiding, and why she's sharing this now

This one is for anyone who has ever looked in the mirror and not recognized the person looking back. You are not alone, and you are not bad.

If this episode moved you, share it with someone who needs to hear it. And if you haven't already, follow Toxic Free with KB so you never miss an episode.