My Story: The Day I Prayed to the Devil, But Jesus Reclaimed My Soul

In this deeply personal and transparent episode, I open up and share in full depth my raw story about the miraculous redemption of Jesus Christ.

From a very young age, I was met with immense inner turmoil and intrusive thoughts. At 13 years old, I was exposed to pornography for the first time, sparking a deep and destructive 14-year addiction. At that exact same time, I realized I was struggling with same-sex attraction—a heavy thorn in my side that I had no idea how to navigate while being told by the world that it was who I was.

I open up about the darkest periods of my life, including using toxic coping mechanisms, getting married and divorced, falling back into the abyss of depression, and eventually fantasizing about ending my life. I even share the terrifying night I felt so abandoned by God that I literally prayed to and worshiped the devil.

But a total rock bottom became the exact foundation I needed to finally rebuild my identity strictly on the Word of God. I want to talk about the radical difference between who I was and who I am now as an entirely new creature walking in His abundant life.

What you’ll hear:

Living a double life: Leadership on the outside vs. hidden darkness on the inside.

The 14-year battle with pornography addiction and same-sex attraction starting at age 13.

The reality of deep inner turmoil and crying myself to sleep as a teenager.

The dangerous timeline of escalation: How pornography leads straight to the gates of hell.

Spiritual warfare: Facing literal demonic attacks while trying to find the light again.

The blueprint to freedom: The exact morning routine and fasting structure that purged the lust from my heart.

If you found yourself in my story today, please know you don't have to walk through the darkness alone. This podcast is dedicated to providing you with the community you need to find true freedom.