7. Bernie is with 'And'

7. Bernie is with 'And'

Bernie teaches that the words you choose can shape your reality. In this episode, we explore the subtle but powerful impact of language on how we think, act, and relate to others. From a simple yes/no exercise to the power of and versus but, this episode explores how language can either empower or disempower us—and why Bernie earned the nickname ‘Bernie's with And.’

We're joined by Allison Okamura, Stanford professor and researcher, who shares how Bernie's language teachings transformed how she thinks about her research and how her daughter caught her saying "I love you, but...".

Changing a word might change your life. Come prepared to never think about language the same way again.

00:00 The Yes/No exercise

03:14 And builds, But shuts down

08:05 Have to vs. Want to

08:45 Help vs. Assist - Bernie's cooking story

09:40 The problem with Should

10:08 Why questions between equals

13:08 The "Bernie's with And" hat story

15:07 Introducing Allison Okamura

17:02 Allison’s class project: Japan, robotics, and her an ex-ex-ex

23:47 Allison on using And vs. But

26:11 Getting called out by her daughter

27:13 Bernie summarizes

28:28: Bernie’s book And/But edits

Follow us on Instagram: @yelloweyedcats to see Bernie's 'And' hat and other references from our podcast.

Co-hosts: Bernie Roth & Krista Donaldson; Producer: Krista Donaldson

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Avsnitt(16)

Bonus 12. The Designer in Society continues (to evolve!)

Bonus 12. The Designer in Society continues (to evolve!)

What happens when you take a leap without knowing exactly how it will turn out?In this bonus episode, Krista sits down with Bernie and Perry Klebahn, who now teaches The Designer in Society, to reflec...

6 Jan 34min

Bonus 11. Advice for Students

Bonus 11. Advice for Students

In this *mini* bonus episode, Bernie and David Janka, our guest from episode 11, share the advice they give students when asked about classes, careers, and first jobs.Bernie likes to tell students tha...

17 Sep 20254min

11. Life is a C***shoot

11. Life is a C***shoot

In this (final official!) episode, Bernie reflects on how the most meaningful turns in life often come from chance rather than careful planning. He shares his own serendipitous journey to becoming a p...

20 Aug 202531min

10. Projection and other useful tools

10. Projection and other useful tools

In this episode, Bernie explores how learning from others helps us learn about ourselves, especially when we are seeking assistance. From mantras collected from colleagues ("We don't have enough time ...

6 Aug 202531min

9. We're all in this together

9. We're all in this together

In this episode, we talk about the importance of shared humanity within teams or groups. Bernie explains his original, and often awkward, icebreaker “When was the last time you…” and explains how Stan...

23 Juli 202531min

8. Who are you really?

8. Who are you really?

Bernie explores one of his most liberating concepts: your self-image is malleable. From a show business manager who found it "really hurt" to be nice, to students writing down "10 things you would nev...

9 Juli 202529min

Bonus 8B. The Truth Process

Bonus 8B. The Truth Process

In this bonus episode, Bernie walks you through his exercise, “The Truth Process.” Using simple guided imagery, he shares a helpful way to tackle something you’re struggling with or to let go of what ...

2 Juli 202519min

Bonus 8A. The House Fantasy

Bonus 8A. The House Fantasy

In this bonus episode, Bernie guides you through his exercise, “The House Fantasy.” By imagining and exploring a house as a stand-in for yourself, you might discover new insights about who you are and...

2 Juli 202515min

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