The Gaslight Diaries28 Dec 2025

Girlfriend Talk: I Been Searching For A Real one

Looking back, Lela reflects on years of searching for love real love, without conditions, without manipulation, without being pimped out or used. From 2008–2011, she tried to make something real with John. From 2011–2018, she searched for a partner who was ready for commitment. One of her deepest connections was with a club security guard she met while working to make ends meet intense but short-lived, because he wasn’t commitment ready.

Through girl talk and heart-to-heart convos with her girlfriends, Lela begins to see the patterns, the red flags, and the lessons. And then came Steve the first man to open his heart and his home, showing her what a glimpse of a soft life could look like.

Explicitly honest, tender, and full of revelations, this episode is a love story told through pain, growth, and hope.

👉🏾 Trigger Warning: Emotional abuse, relationship trauma, explicit language.

Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach more people who need it.

For more tools to help you heal, glow up, and create your own soft life, check out my Grow Up to Glow Up Manual along with other books, journals, and resources available now in my online store.

👉🏾 Shop Books & Products Here: www.luxelifebylela.com 👉🏾 Follow My Art & Lifestyle Brand: www.lelalovelee.com 👉🏾 Connect with Me on TikTok & Instagram: @TheArtistLela @lelaluvlee

Every purchase goes right back into supporting this podcast and empowering women like you to rebuild, reclaim, and rise.

"Until next time, protect your peace, honor your glow, and remember, you deserve a life without struggle

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Avsnitt(35)

Finally Broken Up But You Still Can't Break Me

The moment we’ve all been waiting for: the breakup. Years of manipulation, abuse, and emotional chaos finally culminate in a dramatic, cathartic exit. This isn’t just a breakup it’s a full reckoning, ...

21 Juni 22min

I’ll HitchHike To NY Before I Let You Stop Me From Visiting My Daughter

In this bonus episode of The Gaslight Diaries, listeners are taken inside one of the most heartbreaking moments of Lela’s journey. All she wants is the simple, sacred act of visiting her daughter’s gr...

7 Juni 1min

If I'm Destined To Die Can I be with my Family

Lela opens up about the relentless psychological abuse that has pushed her to the edge. Every day in this house is a gauntlet: threats, intimidation, and constant reminders that her life is at risk. I...

17 Maj 2min

If I'm Destined To Die Can I be with my Family

GTFOH Thanks for tuning in to today’s episode of The Gaslight Diaries. If this conversation hit home for you, don’t forget to subscribe, share, and leave a review your support helps this show reach mo...

10 Maj 23s

Confessional: I’m Constantly Being Manipulated And It’s Making Me Sick

Lela goes to the mic in her most vulnerable episode yet. Constant manipulation has left her sick, trapped, and isolated prisoner in her own home. Nearly 30 days have passed without seeing sunlight, li...

3 Maj 21min

You Are Seriously Driving Me Covid Crazy 2

26 Apr 49s

Your Are Seriously Driving Me Covid Crazy

Every day, all day, the chaos never stops. Lela’s reality: the news blaring, the radio blasting, and a roommate whose presence amplifies the noise while she’s dealing with PMS, exhaustion, and the men...

19 Apr 3min

Pandemic Paranoia Chronicles of the Covid Crybaby 2

The manipulation doesn’t stop. In Part 2, John’s control tactics intensify—turning even minor decisions into power plays. Lela is forced to navigate a world where access to her own mobility, freedom, ...

12 Apr 20min