Building Your Divorce Support Team: Who Belongs in Your Corner?

🎧 Listen if you…

• Are exhausted from justifying your divorce to everyone around you

• Have family pressuring you to "keep it amicable" or reconcile

• Suspect your ex has recruited your friends, in-laws or family

• Aren't sure your lawyer is actually in your corner

This is general information only, not legal advice always consult a lawyer about your circumstances. This episode discusses family violence and coercive control. In danger? Call 000. Support: 1800 RESPECT (1800 737 732).

You can do everything right in your divorce and still be exhausted because of the people standing around you

00:00 – Divorce Support Team: Why the People Around You Matter

02:30 – Why You Never Plan Your Team (But Should)

03:30 – Lyn's Divorce 40 Years Ago: Judgement in a Country Town

04:30 – Your Ex Is Not on Your Support Team

06:00 – Family Members: Who Helps and Who Hurts

08:00 – "Keep It Amicable" Is Code for "Just Give In"

09:30 – When Family Cares More About How It Looks

10:30 – Family Violence: When Family Pressure Becomes Unsafe

11:00 – It's Not Your Job to Explain Coercive Control to Everyone

12:00 – The One Loyal Family Member Who Saw Behind the Mask

13:00 – What to Say to Pressuring Family Members

14:30 – In-Laws: Pausing Even the Good Relationships

17:00 – Enabler In-Laws and When to Distance Fast

19:00 – Family Violence Orders: When Family Contact Breaks the Rules

20:30 – Friends: Who Rolls Up Their Sleeves vs Who Stays "Neutral"

23:00 – Judgy Friends and the Gossip Collectors

25:00 – Screenshots to Your Ex: The Social Media Trap

26:30 – Don't Forget the Fun Friends: Finding Glimmers of Joy

28:30 – Online Support Groups: The Risks Nobody Talks About

30:00 – Commenting Publicly About Your Case: Court Consequences

32:00 – The Tom Holland Rule for Handling Criticism

32:45 – Choosing a Lawyer: What the Right One Looks Like

36:00 – Lawyer Red Flags: Gatekeeping Your Story (Episode 166)

37:00 – Brave Lawyers vs Lawyers Afraid of Court

38:30 – The Three As: Affability, Availability, Ability

39:30 – Why You Need Your Own Psychologist

41:00 – Emotion-Driven Strategy: The Most Expensive Mistake

42:30 – Kids and School: One Contact Person + the Counsellor

45:30 – Church and Faith Communities: Support or Pressure?

49:00 – Your Kids Can't Be on Your Team

50:00 – Bad Podcasts, Reddit and Wrong Information

53:00 – Rapid Fire: Neutral Besties, Slow Lawyers & Nosy Sisters

56:30 – High-Conflict Ex: What Your Team Needs to Be

58:30 – Avoidant Ex: The Friends Who Do the Hard Yakka

59:30 – Manipulative & Controlling Ex: Vetting for Flying Monkeys

1:00:30 – Amicable Split: Why You Still Need a Team

1:01:45 – "It's My Decision": Mum's Cushion Wisdom

🔗 Resources

10 Essential Boundaries for a Healthier Divorce (Ep 173)

When In-Laws Interfere in Your Divorce (Ep 305)

Legal Gatekeeping: Is Your Lawyer Telling Your Full Story? (Ep 166)

1800 RESPECT – 1800 737 732 | Lifeline – 13 11 14 | Police – 000

The Divorce Course – www.thedivorcecourse.com.au

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