His Dad Died on 9/11. Grief Has Shaped Everything Since.

David Ferrugio was just 12 years old when his father was killed in the September 11th attacks. Growing up in a New Jersey commuter town, David went to school that morning knowing his dad worked in the World Trade Center but with no way to comprehend what was unfolding. More than two decades later, he still lives with a uniquely public kind of grief—one where the day his father died belongs, in some way, to everyone. From unexpectedly encountering footage of the attacks to grieving the relationship with his dad he never got to have as an adult, that loss has profoundly shaped the way David thinks about death, life, and what we do with the time we're given.

In this conversation, David and Heather talk candidly about losing a parent young, the strange reality of grieving someone whose death is part of history, and why humor—even the wildly inappropriate kind—can sometimes help us carry the unbearable. David shares how repeatedly confronting the footage of 9/11 became part of his own grieving process, why he believes getting unstuck requires both grace and accountability, and how his father's death ultimately led him to create the podcast DEAD Talks. They also explore post-traumatic growth, survivor's guilt, mediumship, the possibility of an afterlife, and the importance of staying present when you know firsthand how quickly everything can change. It's an honest, sometimes funny conversation about accepting the absurdity of life and death, leaving room for the "maybe," and choosing to keep living when someone you love no longer can.

Resources & Ways to Connect

• You're Not Dead Yet: https://a.co/d/0fcJmUZB

• DEAD Talks: https://deadtalks.net/

• Jake’s Help from Heaven Website: http://jakeshelpfromheaven.org/

• Jake’s Help from Heaven Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jakeshelp

• Jake’s Help from Heaven Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jakeshelp

• APOY Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aplaceofyespodcast

• Heather’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heathersstraughter

• Our YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/@aplaceofyespodcast

• For more of Heather’s writing and thoughts: https://ohheather.substack.com/

• Everything’s Jakey (Substack): https://everythingsjakey.substack.com/