UnF*ck Your Brain: Feminist Self-Help for Everyone10 Sep

526. Why Asking For What You Want Matters Even If You Don't Get It

How many times have you decided there is no point in asking for what you want because you probably won’t get it? Maybe you want to ask for a raise, a different role at work, more support from your partner, or a change in your relationship. Your brain has a million reasons why it won’t work, why it’s not the right time, or why wanting it says something bad about you.

In this episode, I explain why that entire framework is backwards and why the point of asking is not just getting the answer you want. I break down why your brain is not a reliable predictor of what is possible, how fear of your own thoughts and emotions can keep you from speaking up, and why the most important outcome of asking is becoming someone who tells the truth about what she wants.

Because when you stop making the ask about whether you get a yes, you stop handing other people control over what you believe you are allowed to want.

Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://schoolofnewfeministthought.com/526

Watch episodes over on YouTube: youtube.com/@karaloewentheilcoaching

Follow along on Instagram: instagram.com/karaloewentheil/

Mentioned in this episode:

How to Ask for What You Want

Over five days, you’ll find out what’s keeping you from asking for what you want – and how to actually do it, even when your brain tries to stop you. Live Challenge: September 21-25, 2026 · 12 p.m. ET

Det här avsnittet är hämtat från ett öppet RSS-flöde och publiceras inte av Podme. Det kan innehålla reklam.

Avsnitt(604)

How to Ask for What You Want

Over five days, you’ll find out what’s keeping you from asking for what you want – and how to actually do it, even when your brain tries to stop you.Live Challenge:September 21-25, 2026 · 12 p.m. ETSi...

9 Sep 1min

525. Coaching Hotline: I Want to Stay Home with My Kids, but I Need to Make Money

Do you have to choose between staying home with your kids and contributing financially to your family? In this Coaching Hotline episode, I answer a listener’s question about feeling torn between these...

8 Sep 6min

524. You Don't Need to Heal; You Need to Admit What's True – with Dr. Marisa Franco

So much of the self-help world teaches us that the solution to our problems is to become a better, more healed, more secure version of ourselves. In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Marisa G. Franco, a...

3 Sep 30min

523. Coaching Hotline: How Can I Stop My Constant Inner Critic & Monologue

Do you have an inner monologue that is constantly keeping score, reminding you what you accomplished, and trying to prove that you’re doing enough? This week, I answer a Coaching Hotline question from...

1 Sep 5min

522. How to Know What You Want (Greatest Hits)

What if you do know what you want, but you’ve just gotten really good at talking yourself out of it? In this Greatest Hits episode, I break down why so many women feel disconnected from their own desi...

27 Aug 18min

521. Coaching Hotline: I Can't Let Go of a Friendship That Ended

Some endings are hard because the person is still alive, but the relationship you had with them is gone. This week, I answer a Coaching Hotline question from a listener who is grieving a friendship th...

25 Aug 5min

520. Speaking Up from Activation v Peace (My Own Self-Coaching!)

Have you ever been so angry that you wanted to say something immediately, but you also knew you were probably not in the clearest state of mind? In this episode, I walk you through a real moment from ...

20 Aug 15min