The Confidence Trap: Why Talented Women Get Overlooked at Work with Laura Weldy

When Laura Weldy was first building her coaching practice, she took a group of the most accomplished women she knew out for coffee, one by one, and asked what was standing between them and what they wanted at work. Almost every answer came back the same: “I don't have anyone advocating for me in the room.” But when she pushed further and asked what they wanted their allies to say on their behalf, nobody had an answer. That gap—between wanting to be seen and knowing how to ask for it—became the foundation of her coaching practice and her framework, the Personal Power Code. Today, Laura is a women's leadership coach, speaker, and podcast host who helps high-achieving mid-career women build fulfilling careers and lead authentically. On this episode, she and Amanda get into the specific phrases that undercut women before they've made their point, the difference between an ally and a sponsor, and why "just be more confident" is some of the least useful career advice out there. This episode is about what happens the moment you stop asking for permission to take up space and start deciding you already belong in the room. Key takeaways: Confidence at work is about having a clear, well-thought-out perspective, and building that perspective is most women's real growth edge. Small qualifiers like "sorry," "just," and "this might be a dumb question" undermine your authority before you've even made your point. Allies will back you up in a room, but sponsors are the ones who speak up for you in rooms you're not in—and you have to tell them exactly what you want before they can do that for you. The "likability trap" hits hardest for women who lead with connection, since softening their language and over-accommodating others can feel safer than risking being disliked. Your work cannot speak for itself: if you're not talking about your wins, nobody knows they happened. Reframing your default language—like swapping "I could be wrong, but" for "my thought is X, and here's why"—changes how people receive you before you've said anything else. Timestamps 0:00 Intro 0:47 What women deserve to know about taking up space 2:20 How ambition has changed for women 4:05 Why "just be more confident" doesn't work 6:00 The real reason women don't get promoted 8:10 How to find your professional point of view 11:21 The five traits that build a leadership brand 13:16 Why women hesitate to ask for what they want 17:34 Phrases confident communicators avoid 19:21 Breaking the "manufactured vulnerability" habit 22:48 Allies vs. sponsors 25:48 Reframing promotions as wins for your manager 28:43 Talking about your wins without feeling cringe 29:39 Rapid fire: better scripts for common powerless phrases 31:26 Laura's final word on confident communication GUEST LINKS Learn more about Laura: lauraweldy.com Follow Laura: instagram.com/lauraweldy Connect with Laura: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laura-weldy/ Join her retreat for women in tech: https://topshelfretreat.com/ FOLLOW THE PODCAST IG: https://www.instagram.com/girlboss/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@girlboss Amanda Goetz: https://www.instagram.com/theamandagoetz/ https://girlboss.com/pages/ambition-2-0-podcast SIGN UP Subscribe to the Girlboss Daily newsletter: https://newsletter.girlboss.com/ For all other Girlboss links: https://linkin.bio/girlboss/ ABOUT AMBITION 2.0 Powered by Girlboss, Ambition 2.0 is a podcast where we'll be exploring what it really means to "have it all" in work, family, identity, and self… and if it's actually worth it. Each week, you'll hear from hardworking women who've walked the tightrope of ambition. They'll share their costly mistakes, lessons learned, and practical tips for how to have it all and actually love what you have. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices