231: Steve's Story: Gleason 9 Prostate cancer, a Second Opinion, and Finding "A Workaround" for Everything and Hope

Episode Overview:

On this episode of The Penis Project Podcast, Melissa Hadley Barrett speaks with Steve Bartley, a 61-year-old filmmaker and television researcher, about his experience with advanced prostate cancer, hormone therapy, and rebuilding his sex life along the way.

Steve's diagnosis in 2024 came out of nowhere. With no family history of prostate cancer, he only had blood work done after noticing unexplained, rapid weight loss. His PSA came back at 8, and his doctor was blunt: this could be cancer. What followed was a fast and frightening escalation, from an MRI scored at the highest level of concern, through to a biopsy showing a Gleason score of 9, one of the most aggressive grades. A PET scan then revealed the cancer had already spread beyond the prostate into his pelvic lymph nodes, moving him overnight from what he expected to be an early-stage diagnosis to low-volume stage 4 prostate cancer.

Because the cancer had spread, surgery wasn't the standard option. Steve was referred for hormone therapy (androgen deprivation therapy, or ADT) alongside radiation, and describes the whirlwind of appointments, procedures and decisions that followed, made even harder by the fact that he was in a relatively new relationship at the time.

Steve talks candidly about how his radiation treatment didn't go entirely to plan. Urinary urgency set in earlier and more intensely than he was told to expect, and after a difficult stretch without clear communication from his treating team, he sought a second opinion. That conversation, and his own research, led him to make the significant decision to stop radiation partway through and focus on hormone therapy instead, a decision he made largely on his own while his partner was overseas.

Melissa and Steve also talk through the practical side of rebuilding erectile function after ADT and radiation, tablets, nasal spray, and injections, and why trying these options on your own first can take the performance pressure out of the equation.

Steve's journey has also become the driving force behind a documentary he is producing, Prostate Cancer: From Crisis to Cure, featuring some of Australia's leading prostate cancer specialists and due for release later this year or early 2027. The aim, in his words, is simple: to give men and their partners hope, and to break the silence that still surrounds this disease. Subscribe to our newsletter and resource library for updates on when the doco will be released https://rshealth.com.au/resource-library

In This Episode, We Cover

• A high-risk diagnosis (a high Gleason score 9, or cancer that has spread to nearby lymph nodes) doesn't mean the outlook is hopeless

• Getting a second opinion, and changing treatment course mid-way, is a legitimate option

• Side effects of radiation and hormone therapy

• Peer support groups for men with prostate cancer offer huge value beyond exercise connecting with other men going through treatment reduces isolation

• Medications, commonly used for depression and menopausal hot flushes, can also help manage hot flushes caused by hormone therapy in men

Key message from Steve:

There's always a workaround, whatever you're facing with your erections, your relationship, your physical health, or your cure. And if there isn't a way through today, there will be tomorrow. Find the best people, ask questions, take notes to your appointments, and don't be afraid to get a second opinion if something doesn't feel right.

Need Support?

At Restorative Health Clinic, we support men and their partners with:

• Penile rehabilitation after prostate cancer treatment

• Erectile dysfunction

• Vacuum pump and constriction ring education and prescription

• Penile injection therapy

• Intimacy and sexual recovery

• Partner-inclusive support where appropriate

• Practical, evidence-based strategies for rebuilding confidence and function

We offer telehealth consultations Australia-wide and internationally, making it easier for men to access experienced, compassionate support no matter where they live. If Steve’s story sounds familiar, we would love to hear from you.

Restorative Health Clinic also has a psychologist-sexologist in the team. If you are struggling with the emotional or psychological side of erectile dysfunction, prostate cancer recovery, or intimacy, we can support you there too as an individual or as a couple.

Resources & Links

• Book a telehealth appointment with our sexual health nurse practitioners at https://rshealth.com.au/book-appointment or email admin@rshealth.com.au

• We also have a free Resource Library, sign up for access here: https://rshealth.com.au/resource-library

• For more information check out our websites www.rshealth.com.au , www.makehardeasy.com.au and www.melissahadleybarrett.com.au

• Click here to shop for medical devices and other products mentioned on the show https://restorative-health-clinic.myshopify.com/

Click here to watch Melissa’s YouTube videos: Melissa Hadley Barrett

Listen & Subscribe

If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe, rate, and review The Penis Project Podcast. Your feedback helps more men and their partners find these conversations. Search for The Penis Project Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your favourite podcast app.

We also have a free Resource Library, sign up for access here: https://rshealth.com.au/resource-library

Connect With Us

We love hearing from real people navigating their health. If you would like to share your story or ask a question, get in touch.

Email: admin@rshealth.com.au

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TEDx Talk:

• Watch on YouTube