912. You are the chooser: How to date with self-worth + stop chasing the wrong people

Serena Kerrigan, author of Let’s Fucking Date, joins us for a candid conversation about relationships, self-worth, and the mindset shifts that can completely change the way you date. She gets real about going from chasing validation to knowing you are the chooser. From the “three P” theory—potential, practice, or plot—to the two-drink rule, Serena shares how to make dating feel lighter, more fun, and less like a search for “the one.” We unpack red flags, the ick, pacing, standards, and why your time is a valuable resource. We also talk about the difference between true self-worth + self-sabotage, why healthy relationships can mirror the parts of yourself you still need to grow, and how to stop projecting old heartbreak onto someone new. We also talk about: Why being single can be such a powerful season of self-worth + personal growth The “Mirror, Mirror” practice + talking to yourself like your own best friend Why we’re often attracted to people who reinforce what we believe we deserve The three P’s of dating: potential, practice, or plot How to tell the difference between the ick + an actual red flag The two-drink rule, pacing, and protecting your time How high standards can sometimes become limitations The difference between a foundation list + a flex list when dating What healthy love feels like: safety, ease, confidence, and being fully seen Why your friendships can become the blueprint for the relationship you want Resources: Book: https://letsfuckingdate.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/serenakerrigan Sponsors: Quince | Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to https://quince.com/almost30. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Instant Hydration | Go to https://instanthydration.com/ALMOST30 and use code ALMOST30 for over 40% off your first subscription order. BetterHelp | Sign up and get 10% off at https://BetterHelp.com/almost30. Ritual | Save 25% on your first month at https://Ritual.com/ALMOST30. The Real Real | Get $25 off your first purchase when you go to therealreal.com/ALMOST30. Upwork | Visit https://Upwork.com right now and post your job for free. Larineco | Get 50% off at https://buylarine.com/ALMOST30. EllaOla | Go to https://EllaOla.com/ALMOST30 for 20% off your first purchase. To advertise on this podcast please email: partnerships@almost30.com. Learn More: Get your copy of Almost 30, A definitive guide to a life you love for the next decade and beyond. https://almost30.com/book Listen to Morning Microdose! A quick trip into higher consciousness - https://almost30.com/morning-microdose Watch on YouTube - https://youtube.com/Almost30Podcast Join our community - https://www.facebook.com/Almost30podcast/groups Follow: https://instagram.com/almost30podcast https://tiktok.com/@almost30podcast Podcast disclaimer can be found by visiting: almost30.com/disclaimer.