7: I Stopped Settling for 50% and Made Room for 100%

What are you holding onto because having fifty percent feels safer than having nothing?

Maybe it’s a relationship you already know isn’t right. A situationship you keep returning to. A job that’s fine. A friendship you’ve outgrown. The “good enough” version of something because letting it go means facing the fear of what happens next.

Nine years ago, I was thirty-seven, sitting alone in a room in Maui, terrified I had missed my window for love.

Instead of distracting myself, thinking positively, or trying to make the fear go away, I let myself feel it all the way through.

And at the bottom of that fear was a question that changed everything:

Where am I in my own way?

The answer was a fifty percent relationship I was holding onto because having something felt safer than having nothing.

So I let it go, with no guarantee of what would come next, and made myself a promise:

I get to have one hundred percent now.

What happened next changed my life.

But this is not a “manifest your soulmate in two weeks” story.

The timing is not the teaching.

This episode is about what happens when you stop running from the fear, clear the space occupied by what you already know isn’t right, and hold the bar long enough for something different to become possible.

Inside the episode, I’ll walk you through three moves:

1. Feel it through.

Fear has a bottom. When you stop running from it, clarity can finally meet you there.

2. Clear the space.

The relationship that’s fine. The comfortable situationship. The safe job. The draining friendship. Sometimes you have to release the fifty percent before you have any proof the hundred percent is coming.

3. Hold the bar.

Don’t clear the space only to fill it with a new fifty percent wearing a different outfit. Maybe means no. Obvious is the standard. Peace, not anxiety. Reaching toward you, not keeping you guessing.

A line to take with you:

“Don’t be upset about the 50%. Get excited for the 100%.”

Your practice this week

This episode asks you to feel the fear you’ve been avoiding.

And sometimes your nervous system needs support to feel safe enough to do that.

I created Cultivating Safety: A Guided Breathwork & Somatic Practice to help your body settle enough to stay present with what you’re feeling instead of running from it.

• Cultivating Safety: Guided Breathwork & Somatic Practice

If this episode landed for you, send it to someone who’s been settling and calling it realistic.

Follow The Way Back to You so you don’t miss what’s next. And if the show is helping you come home to yourself, leaving a rating and review helps another big-hearted human find it.