302. How to Ask for a Raise in 2026 with Kathryn Valentine

The 2026 job market has been brutal. If you’ve been looking for a job, you know how tough it is. If you already have a job, I’m sure you’ve been told that you should just be grateful. Keep your head down, don’t make waves, ask for a raise when things "settle." My guest today thinks that instinct is completely backwards, and after this conversation, so do I. Kathryn Valentine –– executive coach, one of the country's leading experts on women's negotiation, and repeat guest –– coaches women inside communities like J.P. Morgan, Bain, and KPMG. And her work starts with an uncomfortable finding: women now negotiate as often as men, but succeed about half as often. Today we're talking about what to do when your company says there's no budget, why the timing of your ask matters so much, what AI gets wrong about your salary, and how to survive the messy middle of a negotiation without folding. If you've been telling yourself you'll just wait a year to ask, listen to this first. Kathryn’s Links: 76 Things You Can Negotiate at Work: http://76things.com/ Learn more about Kathryn Valentine: http://worthmorestrategies.com/ Negotiate Like a Woman with Kathryn Valentine: https://herfirst100k.com/financial-feminist-show-notes/negotiate-like-a-woman/ Learn the exact strategies to save money, pay off debt, improve your money mindset, and increase your net worth. Get your personalized plan: ⁠⁠https://herfirst100k.com/ffpod⁠. 00:00 Intro 02:13 Why negotiation matters: career, stress, and $1M 05:24 Women ask now, but with the wrong tools 06:30 Negotiating during layoffs 08:28 The relational ask (and the WSJ advice that backfires) 11:36 Common negotiation mistakes women are told to make 13:12 What to ask for when raises are frozen 15:33 The 76 things you can negotiate 19:42 The gender gap goes way past base salary 26:42 In the room: what to say when it goes off-script 31:08 The three biggest mistakes that sink negotiations 34:15 How to find your market rate 37:32 "Ask a white guy" 40:34 Should you use AI to prep? 44:29 The average negotiation lasts 25 days 45:57 Live calculator: what one raise is worth 50:25 Who to talk to (and who to avoid) during a negotiation 56:54 Changing jobs when the economy is bad 59:25 When to leave corporate and build your own thing 66:27 Why mid-sized companies are best for flexibility 71:07 What to do this week Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices