PTSD, Post-Traumatic Growth, and Prioritizing Mental Health with Jason Kander

Eric Zimmer, a behavior coach and the host of The One You Feed podcast, joins Forrest and Rick to explore what really supports us in changing our ingrained patterns of behavior through the lens of Eric’s journey with addiction and recovery. They share the key lessons from speaking with hundreds of experts, the role of insight, why some people go from insight to action and others don’t, acceptance, shame, and responsibility, and the balance between determinism and agency. About our Guest: Eric is a behavior coach, interfaith spiritual director, and host of The One You Feed, which has over 500 episodes and 25 million downloads. At 24, Eric was homeless and addicted to heroin. In the years since he’s been in recovery, built a meaningful and fulfilling life for himself, and has used the lessons from his own life to help others do the same. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:25: The parable of the two wolves 7:45: Applying our values to our own mental processes 13:00: Change as a three part process: insight, acceptance, and action 14:50: Why some people have an easier time changing than others 19:30: Continuous feedback, quick iterations, and where you rest your mind 23:00: Do we all have the same level of choice? 26:40: Shame, and differing interventions for differing levels of agency 32:40: Feeding the good wolf 40:35: How to want what’s good for us 47:10: Acceptance, responsibility, and beginner’s mind 50:10: What’s missing from the abstinence model? 52:20: Innate goodness, bumping into enlightenment, and self-compassion 1:01:50: “Devote yourself to what remains” 1:03:55: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

13 Feb 20231h 11min

Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners related to how we can build better relationships (particularly with our families) and deal with difficult people. They explore the common traits of happy families, how to deal with people who weaponize psychological jargon, navigating different perceptions of “what happened,” and repairing a damaged relationship with a child. Forrest ends the conversation by talking about the importance of “going to zero” after a breach of trust. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:00: Question 1: Common characteristics of happy families 8:25: Differentiation and integration 10:55: Symptoms of a less healthy family system 12:15: The role of love  19:55: Question 2: What to do when people use psychological jargon during a conflict 26:00: Defending yourself effectively, and staying on topic 30:50: Question 3: Navigating different perceptions of a difficult event 35:45: Question 4: Healing a strained relationship with a child (or parent) 39:45: Functional repair before emotional vulnerability 46:45: “Going to zero” with behavior when repair is needed 56:10: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.   Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Feb 20231h 4min

All of our relationships include some conflict, the big question is how skillfully we handle that conflict when it appears. Dr. Rick Hanson joins Forrest to walk us through some effective ways to deal with common forms of interpersonal conflict. They explore the four common disagreements, the subtle ways power shows up in our relationships, separating content from process, and how to stand your ground. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction and Rick’s new book 1:25: Common conflicts Rick has seen in couples counseling 3:40: The importance of the way something is said 8:10: Disentangling tone from content 9:45: Distinguishing intent from impact 12:10: The unconscious functions of conflict 17:50: Navigating differences in temperament, and cultivating enthusiasm 25:05: Power tripping, control, and misinterpretation 29:50: Primate politics, escalation, and identifying what’s really happening 35:45: Trust 39:15: How much are we willing to tolerate? 41:10: Dealing with entitlement, and when to push back 43:40: Peoples’ capacity to change, balancing harmony and truth 46:10: Focus on communicating for yourself 49:05: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

30 Jan 20231h 1min

The main topic we explore on the podcast, in many different ways, is change. How can we come to understand ourselves better, let go of who we were, and become who we wish to be? In this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest are joined by meditation teacher and former Zen monastic Caverly Morgan. They discuss how we can release our conditioning, identify the inner voice that leads to change, and get to the heart of who we are. About Our Guest: Caverly is a meditation teacher, author, and the founder of Peace in Schools - a nonprofit which created the nation's first for-credit mindfulness class in public high schools. Her practice began in 1995, and has included eight years of training in a silent Zen monastery. She’s also the author of the wonderful new book The Heart of Who We Are: Realizing Freedom Together. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: Caverly’s path to Zen 3:30: Truth and freedom 7:20: Chop wood, carry water 8:30: Why it’s okay to have a “conventional” path to enlightenment 9:35: The voice that says “is this all there is?” 12:25: Distinguishing our conditioning from what we really want 15:40: What supports us in exercising our will 21:20: Resistance, preference, and willingness 23:25: Responding to “should” 29:10: Our will and our ego 35:30: Making room for our own nurturing voice 37:35: Practical ways to listen to the heart 40:40: Awakening together 47:20: Coming home to our own being at the simplest level 50:30: Recap New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

23 Jan 202357min

Before becoming the “Buddhist brain guy” Dr. Rick spent over 30 years working in private practice as a couples counselor and family therapist. Today we’re leaning on that experience, and learning what we can do to build healthier, happier, and more fulfilling relationships. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction and Rick’s upcoming book 3:20: The importance of deliberate action in making a relationship  5:50: 6 practical steps from Rick’s new book 10:05: The relationship we have with ourselves 13:10: When others don’t want the same thing 18:50: Rick’s recurring observations in relationship counseling 25:00: Balancing intimacy and autonomy, and asserting what you want 30:50: Staying on topic and establishing thorough agreements 36:25: Sticking to our needs without alienating others 37:45: Tolerating discomfort 40:20: Getting to truth with others 41:40: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

16 Jan 202349min

We often know what we “should” do, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to do it. Today Dr. Rick and Forrest are joined by Dr. Scott Barry Kaufman and Dr. Jordyn Feingold to explore how we can learn to consistently choose our best selves, overcome barriers to growth, and fully actualize ourselves. About our Guests: Scott is a cognitive scientist, humanistic psychologist, professor at Columbia University, host of the popular Psychology Podcast, and the author of 10 books, including Transcend: The New Science of Self-Actualization. Jordyn is a resident physician in psychiatry, a well-being researcher, and a positive psychology practitioner. Together, they’re the authors of the recently released Choose Growth: A Workbook for Transcending Trauma, Fear, and Self-Doubt. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:40: Why the title Choose Growth? 3:50: Balancing growth and discomfort 7:20: The value of social support 12:00: Growth from positive experiences 14:15: Mindset 15:40: 8 ways to choose growth 16:35: Building self-esteem and distinguishing it from narcissism 24:55: Becoming a transcender 29:25: Transcending dichotomies 34:15: Practicing self-compassion  36:50: The underlying ground 41:30: Creativity and healing 46:00: Daily positive medicine for collective growth 50:15: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Being Well is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

9 Jan 202356min

This is the podcast’s five-year anniversary, and over that time I’ve submerged myself in psychology, self-help, and personal growth content - and as a result I’ve changed in many important ways. At the same time, some things have been very hard to change. It's surprising how even after learning so much I still often feel like I’m pushing the same old rocks up the same old hills.  On today’s episode I’m joined by Dr. Rick Hanson to explore why we struggle to get better, how much change is realistically possible, what makes real change hard, the hidden barriers to lasting change, and what we can do to overcome them. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 3:55: Why do you want to change? 4:50: Four fundamental strategies 7:00: Three common issues 9:20: Effort, skillfulness, and luck 12:40: People’s autonomy about whether they want to change or not 13:50: “Tailwinds” to help yourself 17:30: Secondary gains, avoiding change, and naming payoffs and costs 24:15: Levity and affection for yourself 27:15: Starting by owning that we choose our behavior 30:10: Resistance and the parts of us that don’t want to change 34:00: Framing, starting with benefits, and absolving shame 39:35: Tactics vs. Strategies 42:30: Celebrating small change, aiming for big healing 46:40: Recap New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Sponsors: This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

2 Jan 202356min

We’ve come to the end of another year, and it’s a good time to take stock and consider how we’d like to grow and change during our next trip around the sun. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick focus on what supports us and what holds us back from reinventing ourselves and becoming all we wish to be. They talk about how they’d like to change over the next year, different approaches to new year’s resolutions, do a little digging around in Forrest’s psyche, and highlight a few practical things we can do to support our growth.  New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year’s sale is going on now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: Different frameworks around goals and intentions 6:15: Forrest’s goal: more freedom, less constraint 8:50: Integrating the mundane and the profound 11:35: What supports us in changing? What constrains us? 13:35: Mentors, and other sources of encouragement 22:00: Reverting to old patterns when returning to old environments 28:00: Self-acceptance makes change possible 29:45: “Trim tabs” and other forms of psychological leverage 35:30: Diligence, effort, and consistency 37:50: Addressing deficits and reassuring yourself 40:30: Relaxing around inevitability 41:40: Embracing the joy of possibility and change 46:35: Recap Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

26 Dec 202254min