EP371 - Can Pornography Empower Women?

Welcome to episode 150 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am joined by Dr. Robert Glover. In this episode we discuss the Nice Guy Syndrome, the issues nice guys have around sex, and the ways they can change things inside and outside the bedroom.     Dr. Robert Glover is an internationally recognized authority on the Nice Guy Syndrome and author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan For Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life. He is a frequent guest on radio talk shows and has been featured in numerous local and national publications. Through his book, online classes, workshops, podcasts, blogs, consultation, and therapy groups, Dr. Glover has helped change the lives of countless men and women around the world.     As a result of his work, Dr. Glover has helped thousands of Nice Guys transform from being passive, resentful victims to empowered, integrated males. Along with these personal changes have come similar transformations in these men's professional careers and intimate relationships.    Dr. Glover is the creator of Dating Essentials for Men and the director of TPI University. He lives in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico.    In This Episode You Will Hear:     What is the nice guy syndrome?   What do nice guys struggle with?   How now guys are terrible receivers   The ways in which nice guys show up in the bedroom   Why nice guys have issues around sex   How nice guys struggle with being too routine   Looking at the issue of paying for forms of sexual pleasure over communicating what you want   Worrying too much about performance during sex   Learning to take off the pressure away from performance   How can nice guys change things in and outside of the bedroom?  Learning to ask for what you need        101 Ways To Keep Your Relationship Hot  http://www.sexologypodcast.com/subscribe/  https://oasis2care.com/subscribe/     Find Dr. Glover here:   https://www.drglover.com/    Find me on social media:   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care      Work with me:  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

12 Nov 201933min

Welcome to episode 149 of the Sexology Podcast! Today it’s my pleasure to welcome Dr. Tammy Nelson to the podcast. In this episode she speaks with me about sexual boredom, contributing factors as to why people cheat, and the concept of new monogamy.     Tammy Nelson, Ph.D. is a Board Certified Sexologist and Certified Sex Therapist as well as a  Relationship Therapist and author of several books for couples including Getting the Sex You Want, The New Monogamy, When You're the One Who Cheated,  and the upcoming Integrative Sex and Couples Therapy due out in March.     She is the Director and Founder of the Integrative Sex Therapy Institute in Washington DC., a training Institute, and Think Tank focused on obtaining and creating sustainable relationships. She is also an expert consultant for Ashley Madison, an online dating site for married people. She has been featured in the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Business Insider, Time Magazine, and is the host of a popular podcast, The Trouble with Sex.    In This Episode You Will Hear:     The common mistakes people make to become sexually bored   How sexual boredom can be akin to eating the same food every day   Why being too comfortable in a relationship can cause sexual boredom   Contributing factors as to why people cheat   How desire can increase for a partner when they show interest in someone else  Increasing the quantity and quality of sex in a long-term relationship   Rebuilding sexual intimacy   How changes in personality and identity can lead to cheating   Looking at the concept of new monogamy   What’s the difference between new monogamy and old monogamy?   Managing your unrealistic expectations   The role that technology plays in these changes        Find Dr. Tammy here:   https://drtammynelson.com     Free gift:   Email Tammy through her website and she will send you "37 Questions for your New Monogamy Agreement" -  a handout to create a relationship discussion that can help you start your new vision for the future of your new monogamy.    Find me on social media:   https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care     Bonus:  101 Ways to Keep Your Relationship Hot: Sign up and receive this checklist to spice things up in your relationship for free: http://sexologypodcast.com/subscribe     Work with me:  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

5 Nov 201940min

Welcome to episode 148 of the Sexology Podcast! Today’s episode is a solo episode during which I will respond to listeners’ pre-recorded questions. Here are the questions that I will answer in this episode: Why do so many women have spanking fantasies? How common are BDSM fantasies? How hard should a “normal” erection be? How do I know if I am “hard enough”? What do I do if I can’t get “hard enough”? How can you get your partner to initiate sex more often? How do you ask your partner to have sex without sounding desperate? If you’ve got questions, I have answers! Record your questions here: http://www.sexologypodcast.com/ or email it to drmoali@sexologypodcast.com   Resources mentioned in the episode: Books: Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies https://www.amazon.com/Arousal-Secret-Logic-Sexual-Fantasies/dp/0312302428   Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life  https://www.amazon.com/Tell-Me-What-You-Want/dp/0738234958   Articles:  http://www.repositoryeffetti.it/2010/agoraDisfunzioneErettile/download/letteratura/efficaciaClinica/Mulhall_JSM2007.pdf   https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/jsm.12734 Find me on social media:  https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care   Work with me: https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/ Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

31 Okt 201924min

Welcome to episode 147 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m delighted to welcome CrisMarie Campbell and Susan Clarke to the podcast. In this episode they speak to me about the misconceptions people have around having good relationships, not over compromising in a relationship and finding your voice to communicate what you really want to your partner.     CrisMarie Campbell and Susan Clarke are the co-founders of Thrive Inc. They’ve spent 20 years helping men, women, couples, and teams to resolve difficult conflicts and create strong, thriving relationships. They’ve written two books: The Beauty of Conflict and The Beauty of Conflict for Couples.     They’ve given presentations on conflict resolution, communication, teamwork, and creative problem solving at Fortune 100 companies like Johnson & Johnson, Microsoft, AT&T and Nationwide, as well as, at organizations like the Gates Foundation, University of Washington Medical Center, and San Francisco Giants and many others.     They also run transformational retreats for couples several times a year, including Couples Mojo and Couples Alive.    In This Episode You Will Hear:     The misconceptions people have around having good relationships   Learning to not over compromise in a relationship   How the blame game comes into effect when you’re changing too much of yourself for a relationship  The art of communicating this issue with your partner  How having a good relationship doesn’t always mean you’re having good sex  Strategies to help keep your partner excited   Unconventional ways people can feel closer to their partner  Being stuck having left over sex   Learning to say how what you really want   Recommendations to properly understand what your partner is communicating to you         Find CrisMarie and Susan here:   https://www.thriveinc.com   https://www.facebook.com/thriveincmt  https://www.instagram.com/thriveinc   https://www.beautyofconflict.com       Find me on social media: https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care      Work with me:  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Extra Content    Bonus episode, Sex & Anorexia Nervosa: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-anorexia-nervosa-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

29 Okt 201941min

Welcome to episode 146 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to welcome Jose Luis Tapia-Fuselier Jr to the podcast. In this episode he speaks to me about sex and disability, the effect a chronic illness or physical disability will have on a person's sex life, and sex tips for individuals and couples.     Jose Luis Tapia-Fuselier Jr. (pronouns: he, him, his) is currently a third-year doctoral student in counseling education and supervision at the University of North Texas. Jose’s research is focused on clinical interventions for interabled couples in couples’ and sex therapy. Specifically, Jose focuses on the adjustment process after one partner acquires a disability. Jose provides individual, couples, play, and family therapy with a special focus in working with disabled people in three languages (English, Spanish, and American Sign Language) at a private practice.     Jose has spent time working with interabled couples at a private rehabilitation setting for people with brain injuries (TBI and Stroke). He has also presented at the national, regional, state, and local level on topics related to counseling disabled clients, interabled couples and sex therapy, and bilingual counseling and supervision.    Questions Asked & Topics Talked About:    Does having a physical disability change one’s sexuality? Is it possible for individuals with disability to have fulfilling sex lives?  How does chronic illness or disability affect couples’ relationship and sexual dynamics?  The research that Jose has done in this area   Taking a look at the different relationship dynamics   How couples can learn to enrich the emotional quality of their relationship after experiencing these changes?  Overcoming the challenges people face through therapy   What are some of sex tips that you have for these individuals and couples?    Find Jose here:   JoseTapia@my.unt.edu     Find me on social media:  https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care      Work with me:  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Extra Content:   Bonus episode, Sex & Anorexia Nervosa: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-anorexia-nervosa-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

22 Okt 201939min

Welcome to episode 145 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m pleased to welcome Elizabeth “Liz” Newsom, LCSW to the podcast. In this episode she speaks to me about using BDSM as a form of self-care and finding your healthier self, and provides recommendations on where to get started.     Elizabeth “Liz” Newsom, LCSW, is a sexuality/intimacy therapist/educator specializing in working with individuals who identify as kinky and/or consensually non-monogamous (poly, swingers, etc.); those who identify as gender non-conforming and/or have questions about sexuality; as well as those who need assistance with issues such as depression, anxiety, mood disorders, trauma, communication/anger/intimacy issues and much more. In addition to standard individual, family and relationship counseling, Liz is currently expanding her practice to include supervising and training new therapists with her sex positive inclusive therapeutic approach.     For the last few years she has been providing community/professional education regarding working with kinky clients, specifically with the intent of normalizing kink for professionals that work with kinky individuals and educating on the difference between domestic violence/assault and kink. Additionally, she has been providing support and education around parenting, relationship transitions, and co-parenting in the context of consensual non-monogamy.  She is a member of several organizations including American Association of Sexuality Educators, Clinicians and Therapists (AASECT), World Professional Association of Transgender Health (WPATH), Texas Association Against Sexual Assault (TAASA) and a board member with National Coalition of Sexual Freedom (NCSF).    Questions Asked:   How can you use BDSM as a form of self-care?  What falls under the umbrella of BDSM?  What are ways in which people will find their healthier selves through BDSM?  Is it possible to find pleasure outside of your erotic template?   How did Liz’s clients find body acceptance through BDSM?  What are the first steps Liz would recommend doing?       Find Liz here:   www.realisticexpectations.net    Resources  https://www.amazon.com/Screw-Roses-Send-Thorns-Sadomasochism/dp/0964596008    https://fetlife.com     Find me on social media: https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care  https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care      Work with me:  https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/    Extra Content: Bonus episode, Sex & Anorexia Nervosa: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-anorexia-nervosa-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio  Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

15 Okt 201940min

EP144 - Getting Off Without Checking Out with Jessica Graham   Welcome to episode 144 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m delighted to welcome Jessica Graham to the podcast. In this episode she speaks to me about incorporating fantasy in a healthy way, how sexuality is connected to spirituality, and using mindfulness to increase your desire   Jessica Graham is a meditation teacher, sex, relationship, and spiritual guide for couples and individuals, speaker, and author of Good Sex: Getting Off Without Checking Out. She is a contributing editor of the meditation blog, Deconstructing Yourself and co-founded The Eastside Mindfulness Collective. Jessica also founded Wild Awakening, to help people become more human through psycho-spiritual evolution using meditation and self-inquiry. Jessica is also an award-winning actor and filmmaker.   As a gift to Sexology listeners, Jessica is offering one month free on Simple Habit!   Trial Code: WILDAWAKENING First, sign-up for Simple Habit at http://www.simplehabit.com Using a web browser, log into your account. Input the following link: http://www.simplehabit.com/redeem/wildawakening Download the app and enjoy! The free trial will then be applied to your mobile app as well (ios and Android) **Please note, the redeem link ONLY works on the web. Please do not try to input in the app.   In this episode, you will hear: Why are so many partners checking out during sex? Learning to incorporate fantasy in a healthy way Exercises for body awareness Incorporating healthy fantasies with your partner How sexuality is connected to spirituality Learning about the issue of orgasmic shame How women are very cut off from their pleasure Taking a look at the pleasure activism movement Using mindfulness to increase your desire   Find Jessica here: www.yourwildawakening.com https://www.instagram.com/jessicaclarkgraham https://www.amazon.com/Pleasure-Activism-Politics-Emergent-Strategy/dp/1849353263   Find me on social media: https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care/ https://www.facebook.com/oasis2care/   Work with me: https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/   Bonus episode, Sex & Anorexia Nervosa: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-anorexia-nervosa-sex/ Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/ Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/   Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

8 Okt 201936min

Welcome to episode 143 of the Sexology Podcast! Today it is my pleasure to welcome Dalychia Saah to the podcast. In this episode she speaks to me about allowing yourself to have more pleasure, why we struggle to connect with our bodies and finding your erotic voice.    Dalychia Saah (she/her) is a sexuality educator, professor, writer, and speaker. Through her words and work, Dalychia facilitates space for people to connect deeper with their desires for their body, relationships, life, and our world. She is passionate about people unlearning oppressive norms that are externalized, inter-personalized, and internalized that keep us from moving towards a more liberated way of being. Dalychia believes that systematic forms of oppression can be overthrown by a reclamation of intra- and interpersonal power.     Dalychia is the co-founder of Afrosexology, a pleasure based sex education platform that creates educational content and workshops to center the pleasure, empowerment, and liberation of Black people.  Afrosexology’s work covers topics such as masturbation, self love, enhancing communication in relationships, radical twerking, racialized sexual oppression, body agency and much more. Through Afrosexology, she has created space for tens of thousands of people of color to reclaim their sexuality and body agency.     Dalychia is a lecturer professor at the Brown School of Social Work at Washington University in St. Louis, where she teaches graduate level courses in social theory, social justice, and sexuality education. She is also a sought after facilitator and keynote speaker for conferences and events related to social justice and/or sexuality.      Her work and words have been featured in HuffPost, Teen Vogue, Allure Magazine, Vibe Magazine, Glamour Magazine, Harper’s Bazaar, Playboy Magazine, Broadly, and others. She has received the Phenomenal Woman Award, Spirit of Social Work Award, Rev. Robert Gilbert Advocacy Award, and Academy for Leadership & Civic Engagement Leadership Award.    In this episode, you will hear:     The internal and external oppressive challenges that get in the way of pleasure   A lack pleasure pride in our society   How we seek to create goals and aims out of every aspect of our lives   The detrimental effect of being too goal orientated  Why struggle to connect with our bodies   The power of self-care   Liberation through masturbation   Finding your erotic voice   Learning to overcome our fears of allowing ourselves pleasure         Resources  http://www.afrosexology.com     Bonus Episode, Sex & Anorexia Nervosa: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-anorexia-nervosa-sex/ Bonus Episode, Sex & OCD: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-episode-ocd-and-sex/  Bonus Episode, Sex & Depression: https://oasis2care.com/bonus-depression-sex/     https://www.instagram.com/oasis2care   https://oasis2care.com/contact-nazanin-moali-psychologist/     Podcast Produced by Pete Bailey - http://petebailey.net/audio    Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

1 Okt 201939min