989: Bad Behavior Uncorrected Leaves Dad Unprotected | Feedback Friday

Johann Hari (@johannhari101) is a New York Times best-selling author and top-rated TED speaker. His latest book is Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention—And How to Think Deeply Again. What We Discuss with Johann Hari: It's not just your imagination: attention spans are shortening, and finding the mental state that fosters deep thinking is increasingly elusive. It's not just kids: college-age people switch tasks, on average, every 65 seconds. Adults? Every three minutes. We've become accustomed to interrupting ourselves when external distractions aren't there to do it for us. It's not your fault: your inability to focus isn't a personal failure; your focus has been stolen from you by powerful external forces that have left all of us uniquely vulnerable to corporations determined to raid our attention for profit. It's not just the internet and technology: our lack of focus has actually been happening for generations. Discover what Johann learned about reclaiming this focus—as individuals, and as a society—on a trip that took him around the world. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/707 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Miss the conversation we had with Tristan Harris, a former Google design ethicist, the primary subject of the acclaimed Netflix documentary The Social Dilemma, co-founder of The Center for Humane Technology, and co-host of the podcast Your Undivided Attention? Catch up with episode 533: Tristan Harris | Reclaiming Our Future with Humane Technology here! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

4 Aug 20221h 20min

Tessa West (@tessawestnyu) is a social psychology professor at New York University and the author of Jerks at Work: Toxic Coworkers and What to Do About Them. What We Discuss with Tessa West: The seven types of jerks at work: the kiss up/kick down, the credit stealer, the bulldozer, the free rider, the micromanager, the neglectful boss, and the gaslighter. Why prioritizing conflict management as a skill is crucial for identifying and coexisting with jerks at work. How to stop the jerks at work from taking credit for all of your good ideas. Have mercy: jerks at work aren't necessarily villains -- their poor patterns hurt them just as much as they hurt everyone else. What we can do to ensure that we're not the jerks at work. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/706 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Miss the first show we did with Pivot co-host and NYU Stern School of Business professor Scott Galloway? Catch up here with episode 204: Solving the Algebra of Happiness! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

2 Aug 20221h 6min

On this Feedback Friday, Gabe relays the tragic story of a paranoid schizophrenic neighbor that illustrates just how destabilizing unchecked mental illness can be for family members, friends, neighbors, and the patients themselves. And in case you didn't already know it, Jordan Harbinger (@JordanHarbinger) and Gabriel Mizrahi (@GabeMizrahi) banter and take your comments and questions for Feedback Friday right here every week! If you want us to answer your question, register your feedback, or tell your story on one of our upcoming weekly Feedback Friday episodes, drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com. Now let's dive in! Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/705 On This Week's Feedback Friday, We Discuss: Gabe relays the tragic story of a paranoid schizophrenic neighbor that illustrates just how destabilizing unchecked mental illness can be for family members, friends, neighbors, and the patients themselves. In spite of having a dream job and a significant other who checks most of your boxes, current circumstances make imagining a future in your native Russia difficult. Unfortunately, this significant other comes from a conservative family and doesn't understand why you'd ever want to move abroad. Are your differences too radical to build a life together? Your boss is an incredible leader who commands respect across the board. Unfortunately, a family tragedy has overwhelmed her with grief. How can your team offer support without intruding on her personal life? Your significant other is great in every respect -- except for when he gets in a "mood" and resorts to calling you names and putting you down. Where do you draw the line on verbal abuse? Is it possible to profit from selling your business idea when you don't have the financial means to create your own startup around that idea? Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com! Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @JordanHarbinger and Instagram at @jordanharbinger. Connect with Gabriel on Twitter at @GabeMizrahi. Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider leaving your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

29 Juli 20221h 15min

Robert Greene (@RobertGreene) is the author of multiple New York Times bestsellers on power and strategy, including The 48 Laws of Power and The Art of Seduction. His latest book is The Daily Laws: 366 Meditations on Power, Seduction, Mastery, Strategy, and Human Nature. [Note: This is a previously broadcast episode from the vault that we felt deserved a fresh pass through your earholes!] How to learn multiple languages and maintain their use throughout your life. Why it's important to apprentice, and how you can find the right mentor to guide you. How to find your life's task -- even if you think you're too young, too old, or already established in your field. Why social intelligence is crucial on the path to mastery. How keen observation of others serves to sharpen our own skills. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/704 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Miss one of our earlier shows with The 48 Laws of Power author Robert Greene? Catch up here with episode 117: What You Need to Know about the Laws of Human Nature! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

28 Juli 202249min

Benjamin Hardy (@BenjaminPHardy) is an organizational psychologist and author of books about willpower, self-limiting beliefs, teamwork, and the pursuit of happiness. He returns to the show to discuss his latest offering: Be Your Future Self Now: The Science of Intentional Transformation. What We Discuss with Benjamin Hardy: Prospection: rather than remaining tethered to a past over which we no longer have any control, we can visualize a number of possible futures and choose the course of action that guides us toward the one we find most desirable. Most of us don't guide ourselves toward our most desirable future because we're too busy coping with the immediate concerns of daily life to clearly see the course that would take us there. Are you committing yourself to avoidance-driven goals (like doomscrolling through the news) that serve to distract and knock you off course instead of approach-driven goals that nudge you toward your ideal future self (like learning more about your chosen career so you can do your best work and get promoted)? Connecting with your long-term future self to make the decisions that speed you toward this person may require extra effort because humans are living longer than ever before and probably didn't evolve to think far beyond immediate survival. Why it's important to envision your future self as an actual different person -- with different thoughts and motivations -- than you are today rather than just a later iteration of your current self. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/703 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence...See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

26 Juli 20221h 10min

As a closeted, bi, teen atheist, it's a bummer your mom makes you go to a church — three times a week — that has a problem with your very existence. On top of this, she insists you're being overly dramatic about the depression, anxiety, and insomnia you experience every day. How do you even consider coming out to a mother who can't seem to empathize with your most basic needs? We'll try to help find an answer to this and more here on Feedback Friday! And in case you didn't already know it, Jordan Harbinger (@JordanHarbinger) and Gabriel Mizrahi (@GabeMizrahi) banter and take your comments and questions for Feedback Friday right here every week! If you want us to answer your question, register your feedback, or tell your story on one of our upcoming weekly Feedback Friday episodes, drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com. Now let's dive in! Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/702 On This Week's Feedback Friday, We Discuss: As a closeted, bi, teen atheist, how do you even begin the conversation of coming out to your mother when she regularly downplays the depression, anxiety, and insomnia you're going through and forces you to go to her church (which rejects your very existence) three times a week? You were dismayed to learn that your husband (with whom you work) isn't very popular at the office. While you know it's due to his difficulty reading social cues rather than any serious character flaws, you're not sure if telling him will help him improve or completely crush his confidence. You've made the decision not to be bullied by your emotionally manipulative, sometimes violent QAnon-corrupted parents whose values, to put it kindly, do not match your own. The problem: you also happen to work for them. How do you make a clean break from them and their business? As a 73-year-old delver into family secrets lain bare by the modern wonder of DNA testing, you'd like to have a relationship with a few of your newfound relatives. Unfortunately, some people in your family have threatened to cut you out of their lives if you reveal their part in covering up this shared history. What should you do? You're excited about a new relationship that budded from an old friendship. But how do you foster a healthy bond without falling into the rut of codependency you each experienced with prior significant others? Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@jordanharbinger.com! Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @JordanHarbinger and Instagram at @jordanharbinger. Connect with Gabriel on Twitter at @GabeMizrahi. Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship...See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

22 Juli 202249min

Ioan Grillo (@ioangrillo) is a contributing writer at The New York Times specializing in crime and drugs. He is the author of El Narco: Inside Mexico's Criminal Insurgency; Gangster Warlords: Drug Dollars, Killing Fields, and the New Politics of Latin America; and Blood Gun Money: How America Arms Gangs and Cartels. [This is part two of a two-part episode. Make sure to check out part one here!] What We Discuss with Ioan Grillo: The Iron River may sound like something you'd find on a map of Westeros, but it's just a quaint term for the 200,000 guns manufactured or sold in the US moving across the border to Mexico every year. The private-sale loophole that allows "collectors" in the US to sell guns without requiring identification, background checks, or paperwork — often to criminals and cartels at a tidy profit. How "straw buyers" — that is, people with clean records — are paid by gun traffickers to pass background checks and buy firearms en masse without raising any red flags. If they are arrested in the act, however, their punishment rarely exceeds probation. There are 130,000 licensed firearms dealers in the US from which ill-intentioned gun traffickers can make their shady purchases. If that doesn't sound like that many, consider that there are only 14,000 McDonald's restaurants. Thanks to a Reagan-era law enacted ostensibly to protect the privacy of gun owners, the ATF finds its ability to efficiently trace guns hobbled because it can't use searchable, digital databases of sales. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/701 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Miss the conversation we had with behavioral economist Dan Ariely about the invisible (and often frustrating) clockwork that makes us tick? Catch up with episode 417: Dan Ariely | The Hidden Logic That Shapes Our Motivations here! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

21 Juli 20221h 5min

Ioan Grillo (@ioangrillo) is a contributing writer at The New York Times specializing in crime and drugs. He is the author of El Narco: Inside Mexico's Criminal Insurgency; Gangster Warlords: Drug Dollars, Killing Fields, and the New Politics of Latin America; and Blood Gun Money: How America Arms Gangs and Cartels. [This is part one of a two-part episode. Stay tuned for part two later this week!] What We Discuss with Ioan Grillo: How did Ioan Grillo -- a journalist from the UK -- find himself covering the illicit guns and drugs trade from behind the scenes in cartel-controlled Mexico and other pockets of Latin America? The opulent cemetery where narcos are buried in multi-leveled, air-conditioned mausoleums that would make the ancient pharaohs blush. The most devastating examples of human catastrophe Ioan has witnessed while reporting narcos-related crimes over the past two decades. How much danger is a journalist like Ioan really in while reporting from the thick of such unfettered violence? How thousands of children are recruited or forced into doing the cartels' most bloody work. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/700 Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course! Miss our interview with Freeway Rick Ross, the crack empire kingpin gone good? Catch up with episode 121: Freeway Rick Ross | Life in the Crack Lane here! Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

19 Juli 202257min