Parker J Palmer
The One You Feed5 Juli 2016

Parker J Palmer

Photo Credit: Dan Kowalski, Bainbridge Island, WA This week we talk to Parker J Palmer about finding wholeness Parker J. Palmer, is the founder and Senior Partner of the Center for Courage & Renewal. He is a world-renowned writer, speaker and activist who focuses on issues in education, community, leadership, spirituality and social change. He has reached millions worldwide through his nine books, including Let Your Life Speak, The Courage to Teach, A Hidden Wholeness, and Healing the Heart of Democracy. Parker holds a Ph.D. in sociology from the University of California at Berkeley, as well as eleven honorary doctorates, two Distinguished Achievement Awards from the National Educational Press Association, and an Award of Excellence from the Associated Church Press. In 2010, Palmer was given the William Rainey Harper Award whose previous recipients include Margaret Mead, Elie Wiesel, and Paolo Freire. In 2011, he was named an Utne Reader Visionary, one of “25 people who are changing your world.” Our Sponsor this Week is Casper Mattress Visit casper.com/feed and use the promo code “feed” to get $50 off!! In This Interview, Parker J Palmer and I Discuss... The One You Feed parable That wholeness is not about perfection but it's about embracing all that we are His book, Hidden Wholeness: A Journey Towards an Undivided Life What the idea of "the Soul" means to him His experiences with clinical depression and the lesson he's learned, a.k.a. "the pearl of great price" What "the divided life" is That we need BOTH community and solitude The voice of depression The important concept of, "If you can't be in community, watch out for being alone and if you can't be alone, watch out for being in community." The idea of "The Circle of Trust" That sometimes giving advice to someone is like giving CPR to people who can breathe for themselves & when we give them CPR, we're actually inhibiting their own capacity to breathe The importance of letting another person work their way to the answer themselves His book, Healing the Heart of Democracy What he has to say about the current state of politics That rather than looking at the right vs left division in politics, another view is to look at the people who think they can't do anything politically and have given up vs the activists That our founding fathers really got it wrong when defining who "we the people" are The important role that conflict brings to our form of government The Five Habits of the Heart that are important to healing the heart of democracy For more show notes visit our webpageSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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The Happiness Formula: Using Your Body to Transform Your Mind with Janice Kaplan

The Happiness Formula: Using Your Body to Transform Your Mind with Janice Kaplan

In this episode, Janice Kaplan explores the happiness formula and how to use your body to transform your mind. She discusses the powerful connection between our bodies and our minds. Drawing from her latest book, What Your Body Knows About Happiness, Janice shares groundbreaking research on how our physical state directly influences our emotions, thoughts, and overall well-being. You'll discover how simple bodily changes—like posture, movement, and even temperature—can dramatically impact our happiness. Key Takeaways: How your body sends signals to your brain that shape your emotions Why small physical changes (like sitting up straight or smiling) can boost your mood The surprising ways environment and sensory input influence perception and behavior How chronic pain can be “rewired” in the brain and why movement is key to relief The underestimated power of touch and human connection in emotional well-being Why new experiences—no matter how small—can dramatically improve happiness For full show notes, click here! If you enjoyed this episode with Janice Kaplan, check out these other episodes: Ruth Whippman on the Complexity of Happiness How to Unleash the Power of Happiness and Success with Emma Seppala Hope for Healing Chronic Pain with Yoni Ashar Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

4 Mars 20251h 3min

The #1 Mindset Shift to Stop Overthinking and Start Living with Nikki Eisenhauer

The #1 Mindset Shift to Stop Overthinking and Start Living with Nikki Eisenhauer

In this episode, Nikki Eisenhauer shares the #1 mindset shift to stop overthinking and start living. She explores the profound role of insight, emotional maturity, and personal responsibility in personal growth. With her extensive wisdom gleaned from her 17+ years of experience working with highly sensitive individuals, she dives into why some people change while others remain stuck, how overthinking can become a trap, and the importance of balancing self-compassion with accountability. Key Takeaways: 00:00 Insight is the Key to Change 04:37 Maturity Matters More Than We Think 08:37 Your Feelings Don’t Have to Drive the Bus 14:09 Overthinking is a Coping Mechanism 33:40 Stillness is a Superpower in a Distracted World 45:41 Personal Responsibility is Empowering, Not Harsh If you enjoyed this episode with Nikki Eisenhauer, check out these other episodes: How to Harness the Chatter in Your Head with Ethan Kross Overthinking and Internal Soundtracks with Jon Acuff For full show notes, click here! Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

28 Feb 20251h 10min

The Secret to Learning & Problem-Solving in Life with Ben Orlin

The Secret to Learning & Problem-Solving in Life with Ben Orlin

In this episode, math teacher and author Ben Orlin explores the secret to learning and problem-solving in life. He explains why struggling through challenges (in math and life) can actually be a good thing. Ben also discusses the unexpected power of humor and how we can rethink our approach to learning and change. Key Takeaways: 05:16 – Struggle is a Sign of Learning, Not Failure 13:27 – Why We Fear Math (And How to Overcome It) 25:06 – The Role of Humor and Play in Learning 27:36 – The Paradox of Change and the Infinite Steps of Progress 22:03 – Why We Need to Step Away to Solve Problems 50:27 – The Link Between Happiness and Expectations If you enjoyed this episode with Ben Orlin, check out these other episodes: How to Find Real Life in Stories with George Saunders Improvising in Life with Stephen Nachmanovitch For full show notes, click here! Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

25 Feb 20251h 11min

The Hidden Cost of Perfectionism: Why You Never Feel Good Enough with Ellen Hendriksen

The Hidden Cost of Perfectionism: Why You Never Feel Good Enough with Ellen Hendriksen

In this episode, Ellen Hendriksen discusses the hidden costs of perfectionism and why you never feel good enough. She shares the various ways perfectionism disguises itself as a positive trait—when in reality, it can lead to self-criticism, procrastination, and emotional exhaustion. Ellen also explains why perfectionism is less about being perfect and more about never feeling good enough, how self-acceptance is the antidote, and why procrastination is actually an emotional regulation problem (not a time management issue). Key Takeaways: (01:02) – Perfectionism isn’t about being perfect—it’s about never feeling good enough (03:26) – The two wolves of perfectionism: Conscientiousness vs. Self-Criticism (07:36) – Overevaluation: When self-worth gets tangled with performance (16:57) – Guided Drift: Mr. Rogers’ surprising philosophy on perfection and mistakes (26:51) – The power of self-compassion: You don’t need to be perfect to be worthy (39:40) – Emotional Perfectionism: The toxic belief that you “shouldn’t” feel a certain way (43:59) – Why procrastination is actually about emotion management—not time management (50:46) – How to release past mistakes and stop ruminating over failures For full show notes, click here! If you enjoyed this episode with Ellen Hendriksen, check out these other episodes: How to Overcome Perfectionism and Create Your Best Work with David Kadavy How to Manage Social Anxiety and The Inner Critic with Ellen Hendriksen Being a Procrastinator with Tim Pychyl Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

21 Feb 20251h 2min

The Truth About 12-Step Programs: What No One Tells You with Arlina Allen

The Truth About 12-Step Programs: What No One Tells You with Arlina Allen

In this episode, Arlina Allen explores the truth about 12-step programs and dives deep into the common misconceptions, barriers, and unexpected benefits. Arlina shares her personal journey from resistance to transformation, highlighting how reframing common challenges—like the language of “character defects” and the concept of powerlessness—can make the 12 steps a powerful tool for healing. Key Takeaways: [01:06] – Why 12-Step Programs Are So Misunderstood [05:00] – Reframing the Good Wolf vs. Bad Wolf Parable [07:22] – The Problem with “Character Defects” [15:46] – The Illusion of Moderation: Can You Control Your Drinking? [25:14] – Why 12-Step Programs Get a Bad Reputation [28:46] – Rethinking the Role of God in Recovery [37:35] – Why Words Like “Alcoholic” Can Be Both Useful & Limiting [46:31] – The 12 Steps as a Structured Path to Change [50:49] – The 4th Step: Why Looking at Ourselves is So Hard [54:28] – Is AA a Cult? Debunking the Myth For full show notes, click here! How to Recover the Person You Were Meant to Be with Paul Churchill A Journey to Sobriety with Laura Cathcart Robbins How to Embrace Sobriety with Gillian Tietz Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

18 Feb 20251h 8min

The Hidden Relationship Trap: How Negative Narratives Sabotage Love with Jillian Turecki

The Hidden Relationship Trap: How Negative Narratives Sabotage Love with Jillian Turecki

In this episode, Jillian Turecki delves into relationships, the hidden relationship trap, and how negative narratives sabotage love. Jillian emphasizes the internal battle we face between positive and negative thoughts, likening our minds to battlefields. She highlights the importance of not believing every thought that crosses our minds and instead tuning into our hearts and instincts for a more fulfilling life. Key Takeaways: [00:05:20] Relationship dynamics and interpretations. [00:12:17] Relationship resistance and patterns. [00:15:14] Responsibility in toxic relationships. [00:18:04] Taking responsibility for love life. [00:22:14] Relationship patterns and personal growth. [00:29:01] Accountability in relationships. [00:30:27] Truth as medicine in relationships. [00:39:08] Making peace with unhealthy habits. [00:44:26] Relationship accountability and needs. [00:50:22] Importance of genuine appreciation. [00:52:56] Relationship positivity ratio. [00:57:12] Emotional patterns in relationships. [01:04:38] Fear driving relationship behaviors. [01:05:58] Effective communication strategies. [01:10:56] Positive intent in relationships. [01:16:36] Healing from heartbreak. For full show notes, click here! If you enjoyed this conversation, check out these other episodes: How to Make Great Relationships with Dr. Rick Hanson Dr. Sue Johnson on Navigating Romantic Relationships Cindy Stulberg on Relationships Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

14 Feb 20251h 9min

Languishing vs. Flourishing: How to Feel Alive Again with Corey Keyes

Languishing vs. Flourishing: How to Feel Alive Again with Corey Keyes

In this episode, Corey Keyes explores the concept of languishing vs. flourishing and how to feel alive again He delves into the often-overlooked emotional state that exists between mental illness and thriving and discusses how many of us can feel worn down by life and stuck in a gray zone of stagnation. Corey shares his insights on the importance of mindset and how changing the way we think about our daily tasks can lead us to a more fulfilling life. The discussion touches on the critical aspects of purpose, connection, and vitality, offering listeners strategies to move from languishing to flourishing. Key Takeaways: 00:05:29 – The Role of Positive Psychology and Mental Health 00:06:46 – Corey’s Background and the Successful Aging Research Network 00:08:08 – The Purpose of Positive Psychology and Addressing Languishing 00:09:25 – Flourishing Despite Mental Health Conditions 00:10:08 – The Relationship Between Flourishing and Mental Illness 00:12:49 – The Challenge of Defining Recovery in Addiction and Mental Health 00:14:02 – The Lack of Peer Support Groups for Depression 00:15:05 – The Role of Experts in Mental Health 00:16:15 – The Difference Between Sharing with Experts and Peer Support 00:17:07 – The Importance of Having a Clear Program in Support Groups 00:18:04 – The Need for a New Approach to Mental Health Support Programs 00:19:01 – Defining Languishing and Its Distinction from Depression 00:20:36 – The Overlap Between Languishing and Depression 00:22:29 – The Impact of Languishing on Mental Health 00:23:39 – Personal Reflections on Eliminating Suffering and Seeking Joy 00:25:04 – The Challenge of Recalibrating After Addiction 00:25:58 – The Importance of Functioning Well 00:28:05 – The Nuances of Feeling Good vs. Functioning Well 00:30:09 – The Difference Between Satisfaction and Momentary Feelings 00:31:04 – The Role of Storytelling in Perceived Well-Being 00:32:49 – The Importance of Meaning and Values Over Mood 00:33:59 – Allowing Self-Assessment in Measuring Well-Being 00:35:53 – The Criteria for Flourishing and Languishing 00:37:08 – Encouraging Reflection and Integration for Listeners 00:38:18 – The Importance of Functioning Well in Achieving Flourishing 00:40:28 – The Difficulty of Achieving Social Well-Being 00:41:10 – The Five Vitamins of Flourishing 00:42:01 – Integrating Flourishing Activities into Daily Life 00:45:05 – The Importance of Mindset in Achieving Flourishing 00:47:09 – Research on Mindsets and Practical Applications For full show notes, click here! Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

11 Feb 20251h 6min

How to Shift Your Emotions: Moving from Chaos to Clarity with Ethan Kross

How to Shift Your Emotions: Moving from Chaos to Clarity with Ethan Kross

In this episode, Dr. Ethan Kross discusses how to shift your emotions and move from chaos to clarity. Ethan delves into the complexities of emotions, challenging traditional views that label them as obstacles to overcome. Instead, he presents a fresh perspective, suggesting that emotions can be valuable tools when understood and managed effectively. This conversation explores how our thoughts often skew towards negativity and how conscious effort is required to cultivate a fulfilling life. Key Takeaways: 00:02:30 – Introduction to Dr. Ethan Kross and His Work 00:03:30 – The Parable of the Two Wolves 00:05:22 – Emotions as Valuable Companions 00:06:07 – The Complexity of Emotions 00:07:51 – No One-Size-Fits-All Solutions 00:10:21 – The Metaphor of Physical Fitness 00:12:25 – Variability in Emotional Tools 00:13:34 – The Complexity of Human Emotions 00:16:35 – The Control of Emotions 00:18:43 – The Serenity Prayer and Emotional Control 00:27:00 – The Role of Self-Experimentation 00:30:34 – Tools for Shifting Emotions 00:31:00 – Attention as a Tool 00:34:28 – The Role of Avoidance and Approach 00:38:12 – Perspective Shifting 00:44:11 – Shifting Your Environment 00:48:07 – Using Environmental Cues for Emotional Regulation For full show notes, click here! Connect with the show: Follow us on YouTube: @TheOneYouFeedPod Subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify Follow us on Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

7 Feb 20251h 7min

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