Shinzen Young: Meditation, Mindfulness and Enlightenment

Oren Jay Sofer leads retreats and workshops on mindful communication and meditation at retreat centers and educational facilities around the United States.  He is the founder of Next Step Dharma and Mindful Healthcare and he holds a degree in Comparative Religion from Columbia University. In this episode, he and Eric discuss his new book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication. In it, you’ll learn an updated model on how to skillfully communicate – especially in difficult situations. Practical strategies and helpful perspectives are what you’ll get in this episode.  Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. In This Interview, Oren Jay Sofer and I Discuss… His book, Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication That we’re not stuck, our minds can learn and it depends on the choices we make moment to moment The three steps to create effective conversation Lead with Presence Come from Curiosity and Care Focus on What Matters How most people live with fragmented attention and it takes training to be fully present with another person That you can feel whether a person is fully present with you or not Bringing awareness and attention to the body to come into the present moment (the body is always in the present moment) Bodily sensations happen in the present moment The power of pausing How our rate of speech is connected to our nervous system That when we are present, we have a lot more choices That our intention shapes our verbal and non-verbal communications The intention to understand The intention of kindness and care How you can practice kindness to someone you don’t like Kindness can be about protecting your own heart The phrase “Let me see if I’ve got it…” Listening for what matters to the other person – what do they need? The difference between needs and strategies The Nonviolent Communication Model Observations, Feelings, Needs, Requests Communicating in the workplace Oren Jay Sofer Links OrenJaySofer.com Facebook Twitter Instagram See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

3 Apr 201956min

Dr. Tererai Trent is an inspiring and dynamic scholar, educator, humanitarian, motivational speaker, author and the founder of Tererai International. Dr. Trent is one of the most internationally acclaimed voices for women's empowerment and quality education. Named by Oprah Winfrey as her all-time favorite guest, Dr. Trent's latest book is called The Awakened Woman: Remembering and Reigniting Our Sacred Dreams. She tells her incredible story in this episode and you will be so deeply moved, so deeply touched, and so deeply inspired by it. We'ver never heard anything like it and are honored that she would tell us about her astounding life. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait - there's more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It's that simple and we'll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Dr. Tererai Trent and I Discuss... Her book, The Awakened Woman: Remembering and Reigniting Our Sacred Dreams The two hungers in our life - the little hunger and the great hunger The hunger for a meaningful life Asking yourself, "what breaks my heart?" The rural community she grew up in The wisdom of her grandmother That her grandmother was defined by her wisdom Her answer to the question she was asked - what are your dreams? The moment she was told that her dreams were achievable When her mother said to write down her dreams and bury (i.e. plant) them in the ground. How she broke the cycle of poverty The baton of poverty, illiteracy, early marriage, and abuse that she redefined The baton of wisdom, that she received The four dreams she wrote down When her mother said, "your goals in life will be more achievable when connected to the greater good of your community" The difference between culture and customs The 8 years it took for her to graduate high school Getting into Oklahoma State University but not having enough money to fly to America Feeding the deep hunger that says - you can achieve your dreams When she reconnected with the woman who first believed in her When she finally earned her PhD She worked 3 jobs and took 18 hours of coursework and took care of 5 kids getting her food from trashcans How she is not a victim, she is part of the solution Where her kids are now "It is acheivable" How many girls her work has now impacted See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

27 Mars 201952min

A Teaching, a Song, and a Poem See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

22 Mars 201911min

Oliver Burkeman is an award-winning writer for The Guardian and his book, The Antidote: Happiness for People Who Can’t Stand Positive Thinking explores the upsides of failure, difficulty, and imperfection – which we discussed in our first interview with Oliver several hundred episodes ago. Each week in his column in The Guardian, “This Column Will Change Your Life”, he writes about social psychology, self-help culture, productivity, and the science of happiness. In this interview, he discusses his take on time management in today’s world. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Oliver Burkeman and I Discuss… His take on the modern time management world That technologies of efficiency don’t seem to bring peace of mind How your to-do list is never going to go away That having emails in your inbox is not necessarily a problem Time management whispers of the possibility of true peace of mind Thinking of “a simpler time” How processing through your inbox is like climbing up an infinitely long ladder That tough choices have to be made when deciding what to do with your time – no matter how many productivity assists you have How it’s often easier to spend time on trivial stuff than the big projects David Allen’s book, Getting Things Done How no one beats them self up for not being able to jump a mile in the air because they never thought they could in the first place Similarly, accepting the real limitations in how much time you have and how much you can get done is incredibly liberating  Productivity advice from Warren Buffet The role social media plays in our expectations about how productive we could or should be How digital distractions help us numb out Oliver Burkeman Links Homepage Facebook Twitter See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

20 Mars 201948min

Eli Jaxon-Bear founded and currently teaches through The Leela Foundation, a non-profit organization dedicated to world peace and freedom through universal self-realization. Eli is also the author of many books, including the one we discuss in this episode, An Outlaw Makes it Home: The Awakening of a Spiritual Revolutionary. In this episode, he talks to Eric about accessing and experiencing your true self and things that get in the way of that. Also, he hits on a perspective of the Enneagram that we bet you’ve never considered before.  Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Eli Jaxon-Bear and I Discuss… His book, An Outlaw Makes it Home: The Awakening of a Spiritual Revolutionary Discovering who is feeding the wolves within That to know your true self you have to turn away from your false self – the self you construct in your mind NLP, the Enneagram and hypnosis integrated into his therapy His lasting enlightenment  Knowing what you really want and staying true to it in each moment The journey from “me” to “I”  Symptom cure and habit control His book, Sudden Awakening How your heart is already intelligent and alive That the Enneagram Personality Types is actually the Enneagram of Character Fixation Asking, does this bring me freedom, true love, happiness? Go deeper than the character fixation and find your character Waking up from the act, from the show, and stop taking it personally having to prove things The character fixation of an Enneagram type 9 The “Chief Feature” All of our experience has a Mental, Emotional and Physical component and the ego encapsulates all three of those The history of the origins of the Enneagram His book on the Enneagram Eli Jaxon-Bear Links Homepage Facebook Twitter The Great Courses Plus thousands of courses in virtually any topic and you can listen on demand anywhere get a full month for FREE thegreatcoursesplus.com/wolf Phlur makes stunning, non-toxic perfumes, listing every ingredient and why it’s there. Visit www.phlur.com promo code WOLF to get 20% off first custom sampler set Robinhood is an investing app that allows you to buy and sell stocks, EFTs, Options and Cryptos all commission free at any level. All it takes to do so is 4 taps in the app on your smartphone so it makes investing easy for beginners and experienced people alike. For The One You Feed listeners, you can get a free stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help you build your portfolio by going to  youfeed.robinhood.com If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes: Belinda Gore Amoda Maa See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

13 Mars 201941min

This mini episode is about the importance of taking small steps and how being consistent is not about being perfect. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

10 Mars 201911min

Catherine Gray is a listener favorite guest on the show. She’s been on once before to talk about her book, The Unexpected Joy of being Sober and we received so many messages about how people loved the conversation Eric had with her. In this episode, she’s here to discuss her new book, The Unexpected Joy of being Single: Locating Happily Single Serenity. Are you single? Then obviously this episode is for you. Are you in a relationship? Then – unexpectedly – this episode is also for you! Too often, people stay in bad relationships because they’re afraid of being single, afraid of being alone. You don’t want to feel trapped where you are – you want to be empowered knowing that where you are is where you CHOOSE to be – not where you HAVE to be. So, re-framing what it means and what it’s like to be single opens up everyone’s world by bringing you to the point of choice about your relationship status, rather than the point of “panic settling” or “victim mentality” about your relationship status. Trust us, you’re going to like this one. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Catherine Gray and I Discuss… Her book,The Unexpected Joy of being Single: Locating Happily Single Serenity That being single is not terrible! How being single is a whole lot better than “panic settling” That being single can be nourishing and refreshing – it has everything to do with reframing the way you see it Enjoying where you are at the time That there are pros and cons to being in a relationship and there are also pros and cons to being single The “if-then” happiness loop that’s a moving target How you get used to what you have and then you shoot for the next thing Choosing your perspective on your life and counting up your gratitudes That being single is WAY BETTER than being in a bad relationship How people stay in bad relationships because they’re afraid of being single, afraid of being alone What being a “love addict” means How you need bonding with 5 people in your life – not just 1 – to be happy How essential it is to like yourself in order to be happy in a healthy relationship The three different attachment styles that are created in early childhood (but can be changed in adulthood): anxious attached, secure attached, avoidant attached How feminism – in other words, equality – has made it socially acceptable for women to be single now A thought doesn’t have to lead to an action Don’t let yourself get too “HALT” (Hungry Angry Lonely Tired) Catherine Gray Links Homepage Instagram Twitter Daily Harvest – they deliver absolutely delicious organic, carefully sourced, chef-created fruit and veggie smoothies, soups, overnight oats, bowls and more. To get 3 cups free in your first box, visit www.daily-harvest.com and enter promo code: feed Thirdlove – they have 70 sizes including their signature 1/2 cup sizes! Find your perfect fit online in 60 seconds with their no tape measure needed fit finder. Get 15% off our first order at www.thirdlove.com/wolf Quip has guiding features that are a built-in support system for better brushing and it’s an affordable $25. Visit www.getquip.com/wolf get your first refill pack for free If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes: Catherine Gray (First interview 2018) Mary O’Malley See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Mars 201949min

Jonathan Rottenberg is an Associate Professor of Psychology at the University of South Florida where he’s the director of the mood and emotion laboratory. He’s also the author of the book, The Depths:  The Evolutionary Origins of the Depression Epidemic“, which he and Eric have discussed before. In this interview, they discuss some of the studies and research he’s involved with specific to those who go on to flourish after having depression. Why do they? What can we learn from them? There’s hope and practical wisdom in this episode for you. Need help with completing your goals in 2019? The One You Feed Transformation Program can help you accomplish your goals this year. But wait – there’s more! The episode is not quite over!! We continue the conversation and you can access this exclusive content right in your podcast player feed. Head over to our Patreon page and pledge to donate just $10 a month. It’s that simple and we’ll give you good stuff as a thank you! In This Interview, Jonathan Rottenberg and I Discuss… His book, The Depths: The Evolutionary Origins of the Depression Epidemic Thriving after depression The studies and research he’s involved with People who thrive after depression The destructive and recurring nature of depression The typical low expectation for those with depression about life moving forward and how it should be different What is mental “health”? Psychological well being Experiencing positive emotions Experiencing negative emotions to a lesser degree Feeling of balance in life Having meaningful relationships Feeling a sense of autonomy over your life How happy should we expect to be? Having elements of wellbeing amidst struggling with depression The 3 things that seed a low mood: events, temperaments, and routines Rumination Ways that people can work with depression more skillfully Having a different relationship with your negative thoughts Having connections with others Research on flourishing How much control do we have over our state of flourishing? That it’s never too late There is hope Our culture that idealizes euphoria The role of our basic temperament Factors of wellbeing other than emotion and mood The organization he helped found, Depression Army The interesting and transformative experience of depression That his depression has been defanged and it doesn’t break the skin anymore Jonathan Rottenberg, Ph.D. Links: Depression Army Facebook Twitter Instagram Blinkist – Do you have an ever-growing list of books to read? Blinkist can help! With thousands of non-fiction books distilled down to their most salient points that you can consume in 15 minutes or less, go to www.blinkist.com/wolf for a 7-day free trial Policy Genius helps you compare insurance plans and find the right policy for you at a price you can afford and then they handle everything – negotiating your rate and booking your appointment. Visit www.policygenius.com Robinhood is an investing app that allows you to buy and sell stocks, EFTs, Options and Cryptos all commission free at any level. All it takes to do so is 4 taps in the app on your smartphone so it makes investing easy for beginners and experienced people alike. For The One You Feed listeners, you can get a free stock like Apple, Ford, or Sprint to help you build your portfolio by going to  youfeed.robinhood.com If you liked this episode, you might also enjoy these other episodes: Johan Hari Lisa Feldman Barrett Therese Borchard See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

27 Feb 201951min