72. Attachment styles, non-negotiables and dating men ft. Chidera Eggerue

72. Attachment styles, non-negotiables and dating men ft. Chidera Eggerue

This week I am joined by Chidera Eggerue, otherwise known as the Slumflower, host of the Slumflower Hour and author of the Number 1 Sunday Times Bestsellers What a Time to be Alone (2018) and How to Get Over a Boy (2020) to discuss attachment styles, how to set boundaries and non-negotiables when dating men. We discuss the own hard lessons we’ve learnt through our intimate relationships, how to reclaim your power, the psychology behind why we accept the bare minimum and so much more. Listen now!

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228. The psychology of limerence

228. The psychology of limerence

Limerance - the state of having undeniable feelings for someone who does not feel the same way - feels so much like love but can be so confusing, because deep down we know this person is probably not the one. Despite that we find it impossible to move on, impossible to disconnect or detach despite our best efforts because our affections for this person feel so permanently wired into our brain. Today we talk about why that may be, including:  The first ever studies into limerance The 4 stages of limerance  The addictive explanation for limerance  Limerance, attachment style, fantasy and ADHD What the long term emotional impacts of limerance are  How to recover + 4 tips for moving on Listen now!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

6 Sep 202442min

227. The power of staying present

227. The power of staying present

Our attention is constantly being pulled in every direction: we're thinking about the past, overthinking the future, getting notifications from our phones, information from our environment. When was the last time you truly slowed down and enjoyed the present? When was the last time you savoured the moment like you do a nice meal, or a sleep in? Today we are discussing the power of mindfulness, and the power of staying present, including:  The three biggest enemies to staying present The psychology of disassocation The psychological benefits of living in the moment What the world's biggest happiness study says about staying present  The 3x3x3 mindfulness method  Embracing your 'romance' moments, and more  Listen now to learn about the art of noticing, staying present, and feeling life fully.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

3 Sep 202437min

226.  How money impacts our mental health

226. How money impacts our mental health

Money is as much psychological and emotional as it is a physical resource. For that reason, sometimes money and our mental health don't always mix. Many people think that we only experience financial anxiety or financial stress when we are struggling with money, but it turns out that it's a lot more complicated than that. In today's episode, we break down the interactions between our psychology and our mental health, including:  The difference between objective and subjective financial stress The long term impacts of worrying about money  Why this generation is more concerned with money than ever before  Our 9 money languages or archetypes and how to identify yours  How to manage financial stress in your 20s  How to override your financial impulses and poor money decisions All of that and so much more! Listen now.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg  Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

30 Aug 202452min

225. Overcome your fear of being perceived

225. Overcome your fear of being perceived

Our fear of being perceived is more than just social anxiety, its a real phobia around being scrutinised, observed and primarily judged by others. It's also greatly limiting your potential and ability to be your true self. But there is a way through, there is a way to escape the constant fixation on what others are thinking about you. In today's episode, we discuss:  The origins and effects of scopophobia How our fear of being perceived is both a social and specific phobia Why do we worry about what other people think? Perfectionism and our fear of being perceived  The impact of early childhood experiences  Three mental shifts to overcome your fear of being perceived  Listen now for all that and more!  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

26 Aug 202443min

224. 5 ways to support someone with their mental health

224. 5 ways to support someone with their mental health

Loving someone who struggles with their mental health can be devastating. You want to do all you can to help, but no one has ever taught you how or what exactly you should say, how you can help, the right questions to ask. In today's episode we break down the biggest pieces of advice I have for people who are supporting someone they love with their mental health from education, to understanding our processing languages, listening, advocating and setting boundaries! Listen now.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

23 Aug 202437min

223. Why are female friendships so hard?

223. Why are female friendships so hard?

In today's episode we break down the controversy but also the beauty of female friendship - why exactly are they so difficult? Or is that all a myth? It turns out what makes female friendships sometimes so difficult is also what makes them so rewarding - the intensity, the level of disclosure, the expectations, the bond! We also discuss how society tries to undermine the sacred nature of female friendship through competition, comparison and the cursed role of male attention, but also how to ensure healthy, long lasting connections with your girlfriends.  A big thank you to the listeners who contributed to this episode! Listen now.  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

20 Aug 202443min

222. Am I too sensitive?

222. Am I too sensitive?

The life of the highly sensitive person is often misunderstood. Highly sensitive aren't just people who cry too much or get overwhelmed, take things too personally: they actually take in so much of the world that it can be too much. They feel everything, from joy to sadness, so immediately and profoundly. They are also so in tune with the emotions of all those around them that sometimes it can be too much. Today we break down the psychology of the highly sensitive person, including:  What are the core assessment criteria for identifying if you're highly sensitive? What causes someone to be highly sensitive?  The genetic, personality, parental and temperment contribution  The link between sensitivity, IQ, EQ and creativity + the gentle superpower of sensitive people  Do highly sensitive people have more empathy?  The link between neurodivergence and sensitivity  How to explain your sensitivity to others  How to make the world work for your gentle, feeling soul, and so much more! This episode is FULL of tips, research and studies. Listen now!  The assessment: https://hsperson.com/test/highly-sensitive-test/  Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.com   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

15 Aug 202446min

221. How to be truly successful in your 20s

221. How to be truly successful in your 20s

This episode might be the wakeup call we all need that our traditional notions of success aren't working. We have been conditioned to see success as individualistic, full of sacrifice, centred around discipline, productivity and all about image and looking impressive. Actually, success is a lot more nuanced. Some of the most successful people in the world as the least happy because success does not allow us to prioritise what really matters to us and drives us. In this episode we break down:  The problems with our idea of success Overachiever burnout  Why being successful doesn't always equal happiness  The alternative and how to find your purpose What makes a successful life in your 20s Listen now! Follow Jemma on Instagram: @jemmasbeg Follow the podcast on Instagram: @thatpsychologypodcast  For business enquiries: psychologyofyour20s@gmail.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

13 Aug 202439min

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