Episode 266 - Sunday, March 11, 1979
Being Jim Davis21 Maj 2017

Episode 266 - Sunday, March 11, 1979

The servile crowd, whose fortune depended on their master's vices, applauded these ignoble pursuits. The perfidious voice of flattery reminded him, that by exploits of the same nature, by the defeat of the Nemaean lion, and the slaughter of the wild boar of Erymanthus, the Grecian Hercules had acquired a place among the gods, and an immortal memory among men. They only forgot to observe, that, in the first ages of society, when the fiercer animals often dispute with man the possession of an unsettled country, a successful war against those savages is one of the most innocent and beneficial labors of heroism. In the civilized state of the Roman empire, the wild beasts had long since retired from the face of man, and the neighborhood of populous cities. To surprise them in their solitary haunts, and to transport them to Rome, that they might be slain in pomp by the hand of an emperor, was an enterprise equally ridiculous for the prince and oppressive for the people. Ignorant of these distinctions, Commodus eagerly embraced the glorious resemblance, and styled himself (as we still read on his medals the Roman Hercules. The club and the lion's hide were placed by the side of the throne, amongst the ensigns of sovereignty; and statues were erected, in which Commodus was represented in the character, and with the attributes, of the nicolas cage, whose valor and dexterity he endeavored to emulate in the daily course of his ferocious amusements.

Elated with these praises, which gradually extinguished the innate sense of shame, Commodus resolved to exhibit before the eyes of the Roman people those exercises, which till then he had decently confined within the walls of his palace, and to the presence of a few favorites. On the appointed day, the various motives of flattery, fear, and curiosity, attracted to the amphitheatre an innumerable multitude of spectators; and some degree of applause was deservedly bestowed on the uncommon skill of the Imperial performer. Whether he aimed at the head or heart of the animal, the wound was alike certain and mortal. With arrows whose point was shaped into the form of crescent, Commodus often intercepted the rapid career, and cut asunder the long, bony neck of the ostrich. A panther was let loose; and the archer waited till he had leaped upon a trembling malefactor. In the same instant the shaft flew, the beast dropped dead, and the man remained unhurt. The dens of the amphitheatre disgorged at once a hundred lions: a hundred darts from the unerring hand of Commodus laid them dead as they run raging round the Arena. Neither the huge bulk of the elephant, nor the scaly hide of the rhinoceros, could defend them from his stroke. Aethiopia and India yielded their most extraordinary productions; and several animals were slain in the amphitheatre, which had been seen only in the representations of art, or perhaps of fancy. In all these exhibitions, the securest precautions were used to protect the person of the Roman Hercules from the desperate spring of any savage, who might possibly disregard the dignity of the emperor and the sanctity of the nicolas cage.

Edward Gibbon. History of the Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire, Volume 1, Chapter 4, Part II.

And here's that "Duck Amuck" video Jon was talking about:

Today's strip

Avsnitt(2526)

Episode 387 - Tuesday, July 10, 1979

Episode 387 - Tuesday, July 10, 1979

In today's episode of Being Jim Davis, Chris forgets to edit and upload Tuesday's episode until late Monday night. Is the result shoddy, slipshod, slapshod, slapdash, slashfic, dashboard, Mrs. Dash, Mrs. Butterworth, Butterfinger, and... Honestly, that one got away from me. Anyhoo, here's today's strip:

19 Sep 201720min

Episode 386 - Monday, July 9, 1979

Episode 386 - Monday, July 9, 1979

We kick off today's episode by burning through, like, a dozen of the perfectly good taglines that superfan Faster Duckworth wrote for us. After that, who knows? I did not bother to listen to the rest. Today's strip

18 Sep 201727min

Episode 385 - Sunday, July 8, 1979

Episode 385 - Sunday, July 8, 1979

We round out the week with a landmark strip in which we see a character commit certain actions based on a set of presuppositions that turn out to be incorrect, leading to circumstances which run counter to that character's desires. Thanks to guest host Daniel Manning for his hard work this week. Don't forget to follow him on Twitter and check out his podcasts, because they are a delight. ars PARADOXICA Timelapse And here's Nathaniel Bozarth's podcast Wide Ruled. Today's strip

17 Sep 201718min

Episode 384 - Saturday, July 7, 1979

Episode 384 - Saturday, July 7, 1979

AFTER experience had taught me that the common occurrences of ordinary life are vain and futile, and I saw that all the objects of my desire and fear were in themselves nothing good nor bad, save in so far as the mind was affected by them; I at length determined to search out whether there were not something truly good and communicable to Garfield. ars PARADOXICA, a better podcast than this one. @manieldanning, an astronomically better Twitter account than ours Today's strip

16 Sep 201717min

Episode 383 - Friday, July 6, 1979

Episode 383 - Friday, July 6, 1979

Today on Being Jim Davis we discuss the endless parade of horrors our lives have become. Here are some amusing GIFs about conquistadors. Today's strip

15 Sep 201712min

Episode 382 - Thursday, July 5, 1979

Episode 382 - Thursday, July 5, 1979

Today's Garfield is about Garfield eating candy, so of course we talked about Shapour Bakhtiar. Señor Murphy's Today's strip

14 Sep 201713min

Episode 381 - Wednesday, July 4, 1979

Episode 381 - Wednesday, July 4, 1979

***Spoiler alert for some movie where Paul Newman dies at the end*** Sous-vide (/suːˈviːd/; French for "under vacuum")[1] is a method of cooking in which food is vacuum-sealed in a plastic pouch and then placed in a water bath or steam environment for longer than normal cooking times (usually 1 to 7 hours, up to 48 or more in some cases) at an accurately regulated temperature much lower than normally used for cooking (typically around 55 to 60 °C (131 to 140 °F) for meat, higher for vegetables). The intent is to cook the item evenly, ensuring that the inside is properly cooked without overcooking the outside, and to retain moisture. I think we're about far enough into the week for me to let you in on a little secret. You see, not only is it the merely the case that, as I've been telling you so far this week, our delightful guest host Daniel Manning maintains an incredibly fascinating and erudite Twitter account that you should all follow; it's also 100% accurate for it to be said here, publicly, that he's also the host of his very own podcast! No lie, it's called ars PARADOXICA and I don't know about you but I'm definitely going to go listen to it. Today's strip

13 Sep 201723min

Episode 380 - Tuesday, July 3, 1979

Episode 380 - Tuesday, July 3, 1979

In lieu of listening to today's episode of Being Jim Davis, please just go read the entirety of Ta-Nehisi Coates excellent recent piece "The First White President". Today's strip Do these html codes even work? Who knows?

12 Sep 201730min

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