Getting Real About Getting Older

A man delivers an unforgettable pickup line. A woman asks her Uber driver out on a date. A rancher swears off men and then, years later, suddenly develops feelings for the guy down the road. This week, listeners share offline dating stories for the ages, including charming meet-cutes, frustrating missed connections, and happily ever afters.  We also hear from Maxine Simone Williams, founder of WeMetIRL, a company that hosts in-person dating events in Brooklyn, NY.  To learn more about our Uber driver love story, check out this marriage announcement in the New York Times!  Podcast production by Cameron Drews. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

13 Maj 51min

Isabel Allende didn’t publish her first book until she was 39, after losing nearly everything in the wake of the Chilean military coup. More than four decades later, she’s become one of the most beloved Spanish-language authors, with over 80 million copies of her books sold worldwide. After political exile, writing books became Allende’s way of making sense of the world. She wrote through divorce, affairs, and moving across continents. But after the devastating loss of her daughter Paula, even writing felt impossible, until her mother urged her to begin again. “My mother knew that the only way for me to walk the tunnel of grief was writing,” she says. In this episode, Anna and Isabel talk about loss, late starts, and new beginnings. Isabel met her most recent husband, Roger, in her late 70s, “an age when most people are knitting for their great-grandchildren.” Allende’s newest novel, “My Name Is Emilia del Valle,” is out now.  Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Maj 50min

In West Virginia, Republicans hold one of the largest supermajorities in the country, and it’s growing. Just 11 Democrats — down from 14 last year — are in the 134-member Legislature. It's a political reality that isn't necessarily conducive to advancing LGBTQ rights. But that's Andrew Schneider's job. As head of Fairness West Virginia, Andrew has spent a decade as the only full-time lobbyist at the state capitol working on LGBTQ issues. His approach? Winning people over through listening rather than confrontation, a strategy he developed in college when he purposely chose a conservative campus to practice changing minds. "I quickly realized that if I sat back and let someone talk to me and did not jump in and judge, they would trust me and we could actually have a meaningful conversation where ultimately I could inject my views," Andrew said. In this episode we talk to Andrew, and political leaders in West Virginia whom he’s lobbied, about his relational approach to getting through issues that matter to him, and how that strategy is being tested in Donald Trump’s second term.    This episode is part of a series we’re calling Living At Odds, you can hear the rest of the series in the Slate podcast How To! Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

29 Apr 53min

To fly a plane, pilots must prove to the Federal Aviation Administration that they’re physically and mentally fit. But when it comes to mental health, the rules are complicated and, some say, outdated. Pilots who need antidepressants are limited to a short list of approved medications and must take a mandatory six-month leave. Even common diagnoses like anxiety or depression can trigger reviews that could ground them. The F.A.A.’s rules are born out of desire to keep the public safe, but in this episode we talk to pilots, aspiring pilots, and medical aviation professionals about their unintended consequence: incentivizing people to stay quiet about their mental health issues. Read: Why Airline Pilots Feel Pushed to Hide Their Mental Illness  Podcast production by Zoe Azulay. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

22 Apr 51min

Kareem Rahma, host of the viral web series Subway Takes, says he’s been working since he was 14 and hasn’t really taken a break. In high school, he worked service jobs. In college, he bought and re-sold motorcycles, jeans, and whatever else he thought he could flip.  This week on the show, Kareem explains why he’s had so many jobs, including posts at Vice and the New York Times, and he discusses the financial maneuvering that allowed him to pivot to comedy in his 30s.  You can check out his podcast, Subway Takes Uncut, here.     Podcast production by Cameron Drews.  Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

15 Apr 53min

At a time when skepticism about conventional medicine has become even more mainstream, we’re revisiting a story about the causes and effects of that mistrust. Archie Matlow’s mother refused to get a surgery that could have saved her life, which led to her and Archie trying to love each other while bitterly at odds. You can listen to the full audio piece Archie made here, and you can order their memoir, Dead Mom Walking, here. Also make sure to check out Archie’s New York Times piece, titled Why My Father Called Me Son, Daughter, He, She and It. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

8 Apr 41min

Alongside life's darkest moments there often are moments of absurdity that make us laugh.  In this episode, from a live San Francisco comedy festival in January, Anna and guests talk about the special kind of comedy born of something sad. Comedians Guy Branum and Carl Tart share stories of writing a sitcom about Zoom-era social relationships. Chanel Miller, author of Know My Name, talks about coping with the trauma of being a victim of a high profile sexual assault case… by doing standup. And Faith Albright, a veterinarian specializing in at-home euthanasia, explores the delicate art of finding humor while supporting grieving families through difficult goodbyes. Plus an AI chatbot and musician Matt Nathanson duke it out over who can more creatively sum up each segment.  Chanel Miller’s books are the memoir Know My Name and Magnolia Wu Unfolds It All, which was recognized by the Newbury Awards this year.  Faith Albright’s work at onelivingsanctuary.org.  Matt Nathanson’s new album is called King of Unsimple and he’s on tour…find dates at mattnathanson.com  Guy Branum has upcoming standup shows in LA, Chicago, Seattle and more…find those dates at guybranum.com  Watch Carl Tart’s writing work on SNL… keep track of all his podcasts and improv shows on his instagram.  Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

1 Apr 1h 8min

When Joe Gow was fired from his position as chancellor and professor at the University of Wisconsin at La Crosse, his superiors said it was due to “abhorrent” behavior. Joe had made porn videos with his wife Carmen and uploaded them onto the internet under the name “Sexy Happy Couple.”  This week, Joe and Carmen tell their side of the story and explain how making porn spiced up their marriage. They also defend themselves against the argument that what they did was inappropriate.  Slate writer Dan Kois’ previous interviews with Joe Gow: The Porn Chancellor Speaks What’s Next for the “Porn Chancellor” You can check out our previous series about erectile dysfunction, called Hard, here.  Podcast production by Cameron Drews.  Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

25 Mars 49min