I Was Afraid of Losing Myself to Motherhood. I Found Myself Instead.

I Was Afraid of Losing Myself to Motherhood. I Found Myself Instead.

Elissa Strauss always knew she wanted to be a mother, but she also knew she didn’t want motherhood to take over her personality. After all, she had spent years as a blogger making fun of anyone who took motherhood too seriously. She bemoaned the natural birth movement and people who made “mom friends.” Then Elissa had a son, and her view of caretaking started to shift. “I had put so much energy into figuring out how not to lose myself to caregiving,” Elissa writes in her new book, “that I completely ignored the possibility that I might, in fact, find some of myself there.” In this episode, Anna and Elissa talk about why it feels uncool to talk about liking motherhood, the ways caretaking can take from us, but also how it can fill us up and engender “moral transformation.” Plus, the economics of care, and what really valuing care in society would look like. Elissa’s book is called When You Care: the Unexpected Magic of Caring for Others. She also wrote a piece last month in Slate called “It’s Weird Times to Be a Happy Mother.” Are you a paid caregiver? We want to hear from you for a future listener episode. Tell us some things you’ve taken away from the experience – wild stories, observations about class, lessons about the way you want your own loved ones to be cared for. Send us your thoughts and stories at deathsexmoney@slate.com. Death, Sex & Money is now produced by Slate! To support us and our colleagues, please sign up for our membership program, Slate Plus! Members get ad-free podcasts, bonus content on lots of Slate shows, and full access to all the articles on Slate.com. Sign up today at slate.com/dsmplus. And if you’re new to the show, welcome. We’re so glad you’re here. Find us and follow us on Instagram and you can find Anna’s newsletter at annasale.substack.com. Our new email address, where you can reach us with voice memos, pep talks, questions, critiques, is deathsexmoney@slate.com. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Avsnitt(521)

'Precious' Paid Off Gabourey Sidibe's Crunch Gym Debt

'Precious' Paid Off Gabourey Sidibe's Crunch Gym Debt

The actor's first movie role didn't give her total financial security, but it did help her pay off one important bill.   Become a monthly sustaining member of Death, Sex & Money. Sign up now. Subscribe to our weekly newsletter! We'll send you audio picks, letters from our inbox and updates from the show. Sign up at deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

17 Maj 201729min

Kevin Bacon Shows Us His Cash

Kevin Bacon Shows Us His Cash

The actor opens up about money, sex at 58, and working on Jill Soloway's newest TV series, I Love Dick.  Become a monthly sustaining member of Death, Sex & Money. Sign up now. Sign up for our weekly newsletter! deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

12 Maj 201735min

Two Wheelchairs and A Baby

Two Wheelchairs and A Baby

The idea of having children was just fantasy "pillow talk" for Nikki Villavicencio and Darrell Paulsen. Then, a positive pregnancy test proved otherwise.  Thanks to journalist Kathryn Joyce and Cosmopolitan.com for collaborating with us on this story.  Become a monthly sustaining member of Death, Sex & Money. Sign up now. SIGN UP for our weekly newsletter! deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

3 Maj 201728min

Newlywed and Paralyzed

Newlywed and Paralyzed

Three weeks after Rachel Swidenbank and Hiroki Takeuchi got married, an accident changed everything.  Become a monthly sustaining member of Death, Sex & Money. Sign up now. Stay in touch! Sign up for Death, Sex & Money's weekly newsletter here: deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

26 Apr 201732min

Alec Baldwin Talks Money, Family, Fame and Cocaine

Alec Baldwin Talks Money, Family, Fame and Cocaine

The actor and comedian goes deep on death, sex and money in his new memoir, Nevertheless.  Become a monthly sustaining member of Death, Sex & Money. Sign up now. Death, Sex & Money has a weekly newsletter! And we think you'll really like it. Sign up here: deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

12 Apr 201745min

Pleased to Meet You, Nancy

Pleased to Meet You, Nancy

Meet Nancy—a new podcast from WNYC Studios that's all about exploring identity, finding community, and having frank conversations about the LGBTQ experience today. Find out more at nancypodcast.org.  Support Death, Sex & Money by becoming a monthly sustaining member. Sign up now. Death, Sex & Money has a weekly newsletter! And we think you'll really like it. Sign up here: deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

10 Apr 201718min

Why Rashema Melson Left Georgetown

Why Rashema Melson Left Georgetown

When we met Rashema Melson during her sophomore year at Georgetown University, she was tired of people calling her "the homeless valedictorian." A lot's changed in her life since then. Support Death, Sex & Money by becoming a monthly sustaining member. Sign up now. We have a weekly newsletter! And we think you'll really like it. Sign up here: deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

5 Apr 201714min

A Prison Guard In Transition

A Prison Guard In Transition

Mandi Hauwert thought coming out as a transgender woman while working as a guard at California's San Quentin State Prison would be "insane." She did it anyway.  Support Death, Sex & Money by becoming a monthly sustaining member. Sign up now. Subscribe to the Death, Sex & Money newsletter! This week, we feature your advice for a fellow listener who's settling into a new town. Sign up here: deathsexmoney.org/newsletter. Follow the show on Twitter @deathsexmoney and Facebook at facebook.com/deathsexmoney. Email us any time at deathsexmoney@wnyc.org. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

29 Mars 201729min

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