#39 - Considering Divorce? Or Is There Still Hope?

#39 - Considering Divorce? Or Is There Still Hope?

Having ambivalence about your relationship sometimes is completely normal. You have a fight. Maybe a few fights. You go through a period where you both feel disconnected. Kids, jobs, cleaning bathrooms, the dandelions in the front lawn -- virtually everything seems like it's more of a priority than your marriage. All relationships have ebbs and flows. Disconnection and reconnection is simply the experience of being in a long term relationship. But sometimes ... it is hard to reconnect. Particularly if toxic negativity begins to color your interactions. When attachment stretches thin and you can't remember the last time you laughed together, it's normal to wonder if you ever will again. When negative experiences with your partner start to outnumber the good ones, it's normal to wonder if you've arrived at the "end of the line." Is Divorce the Solution? Not necessarily. Feeling upset and scared about your marriage are exactly the feelings that prompt couples to start marriage counseling. Being unhappy with the situation creates the motivation that you need to do the difficult work of growing back together again. And in my experience, when couples have a will to repair the relationship there is always a way. But sometimes, people begin to fantasize about divorce. They don't know how to resolve their relationship problems, and divorcing feels like the only solution. When divorce starts to feel like the glowing, open door to freedom and happiness -- your relationship is in trouble. And of course, I understand there are situations where you may not have a choice: Your partner unilaterally moves towards the door, or perhaps there are such unhealthy and toxic things going on in a marriage that divorcing is genuinely the only reasonable option. Let's Get Real. If you are toeing up to the edge of this precipice, or perhaps already starting to go through the searing process of taking a marriage apart: This podcast is for you. On this edition of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast I'm speaking with Pro Divorce Mediator Denisa Tova about things to think about if you're on the fence about divorcing, and also practical strategies for creating the best possible outcomes if you decide to move forward with divorce. Main Points: 1) How to tell the difference between "solvable problems" between you and your partner, and situations where divorce is really the best choice. 2) The mindset you need to foster to create a healthy divorce experience. 3) Practical strategies for how to have a civilized, collaborative divorce instead of an ugly, angry one. Listen Now:

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#271 - Emotional Flooding

#271 - Emotional Flooding

Have you ever wondered why you lose it sometimes, and say things you regret later? Or why you get to a certain point where you just cannot talk anymore, and shut down? These are both examples of emotional flooding: Lashing out and withdrawing are two sides of the same coin. Both can be disastrous for your relationship. On today’s episode we’re talking about the reality of emotional flooding, and how to manage it effectively when you’re “coming in hot.”  Join me! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

8 Nov 202158min

#270 - How to Stop Emotional Invalidation

#270 - How to Stop Emotional Invalidation

Feeling invalidated is at the core of communication issues. When couples fight, they're usually fighting to be heard. Feeling shut down, or bulldozed by your partner is not just frustrating — if it happens routinely it can damage your relationship. Today, learn why emotional invalidation happens and what you can do to stop it. By the end of the episode, you’ll have some actionable takeaways to help you feel heard, valued, and understood. With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

1 Nov 20211h 9min

#269 - The Devil Inside: Self-Limiting Beliefs

#269 - The Devil Inside: Self-Limiting Beliefs

What you believe about yourself holds so much power. You have the power to create a really wonderful life for yourself. Or, you can be tricked into believing the devil inside: Your self-limiting beliefs. Self-limiting beliefs are so dangerous because they often masquerade as "truth." But buying into them only creates pain, and damages your self-esteem, your career, and your relationships. On this episode of the podcast, I'm teaching you how to identify your limiting beliefs and overcome them, so you can get back in control.  Happy Halloween!  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

25 Okt 20211h

#268 - Mind Body Connection

#268 - Mind Body Connection

Your mind-body connection is powerful. Sometimes the most direct path to improving your emotional wellbeing isn't through therapy — it’s through lifestyle changes. Other times your physical health suffers because of the way you’re thinking or feeling. The way you think, feel emotionally, and your physical wellness are all interconnected.  Tune in today to gain insight into your mind-body connection, and get actionable strategies to support every aspect of your wellness. Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

18 Okt 202152min

#267 - How to Appreciate The Partner You Have

#267 - How to Appreciate The Partner You Have

It's great to work on your relationship, but sometimes people can get so over-focused on relationship problems they stop appreciating their partner’s positive qualities... to the detriment of the dynamic. In contrast, feeling love and appreciation for your partner — as they are — is the royal road to growth and happiness for both of you.  When do you advocate for change? When do you lean into “appreciative acceptance?” That’s what we’re discussing on today’s episode!  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

11 Okt 202151min

#266 - Love Your Body

#266 - Love Your Body

How to love your body? Although your body is a miraculous engine of life that supports everything you do, it’s easy to get judgy about the way your body looks. Or whether or not it’s as “good” or worthy of love as someone else’s body.  These unhelpful ideas crush your self-esteem, and can lead to truly unhealthy diet and exercise habits.  Let’s all stop. Today, learn how to stop feeling bad about your body, and start moving towards self-compassion, appreciation for your body, and health at any size.  Join me! Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

4 Okt 202145min

#265 - How to Deal With Stress at Work

#265 - How to Deal With Stress at Work

Dealing with stress at work? Whether you’re working from home or back in the office, burnout and career ambivalence are rampant right now. Help is here: On today's episode I’m visiting with an expert career coach who can help you advocate for yourself, set healthy boundaries on the job, manage work related stress and anxiety, make empowered career decisions, and, if you’re an employer, learn how to keep your people happy and healthy.  All for you!  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

27 Sep 202156min

#264 How Do You Get Over Your Ex? Psychology-Backed Strategies That Work

#264 How Do You Get Over Your Ex? Psychology-Backed Strategies That Work

Still stuck on your ex? Like, no matter what you do — they’re still there — in your head, in your heart, maybe even in your dreams? I see you. And more importantly, I understand why. In this episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I’m getting real about something that so many people secretly struggle with: how do you get over your ex when it feels absolutely impossible to let go. Whether your breakup was recent or it’s been way too long and you're still stuck, this episode will help you understand what's really happening in your brain, your body, and your heart — and what to do about it. From the neuroscience of love and loss, to the emotional addiction that keeps you craving contact, I’m diving into the real reasons it’s hard to move on — and the powerful, research-backed steps you can take to finally feel free. Timestamps: 00:00 - How to Get Over Your Ex 05:05 - Understanding the Obsessive Phenomenon 06:55 - Biological Basis of Love and Addiction 11:26 - The Psychological and Emotional Basis of Obsession 13:35 - Accepting the End of a Relationship 21:06 - Strategies to Let Go and Move On 27:01 - Mindfulness and Thought Replacement Techniques 30:16 - Heal from Heartbreak If you resonated with this podcast episode, that tells me something important: You’re not just hurting — you’re trying. You’re searching for answers, hoping for relief, and longing for a way to finally stop feeling so consumed by the past. You’re already on the path forward — even if it doesn’t feel like it yet. Healing doesn’t happen by accident. It happens when you start making intentional choices — to understand yourself more deeply, to process what happened, and to take meaningful steps toward letting go. That might sound like a tall order right now, but the first step is easier than you think. 👉 Start by taking my Heartbreak Recovery Quiz: How Over Your Ex Are You?This quiz is a research-informed tool that will show you exactly where you are in your healing process and what you need to do next. Whether you're stuck in obsessive thoughts, overwhelmed with grief, or just beginning to feel ready to move on, your quiz results will give you clarity and direction.  👉 If you’re ready to talk to someone who truly gets it, schedule a free consultation with a coach on our team. Sometimes you just need a safe space to say what’s on your heart — especially when friends are tired of hearing about your ex. At Growing Self, our breakup recovery coaches are licensed therapists who specialize in helping people heal from heartbreak. We know how to guide you from this place of pain into the peace and self-confidence you deserve.  You can do this— and your next chapter starts now.  Xoxo Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.growingself.com P.S. If you know someone who is struggling to move on, I invite you to share this episode with them to remind them that they’re not alone and healing is possible.

20 Sep 202134min

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