#68 - Overcoming Perfectionism

#68 - Overcoming Perfectionism

Perfectionism is Paralyzing The pressure to be perfect infuses every aspect of our lives: From our homes to our jobs to our appearance to our kids we can feel driven to perform perfectly. Trying to do your best and excel is not a bad thing in itself. The problem arises when anything LESS than perfection is unacceptable. Of course we understand intellectually that being perfect all the time is impossible. But that doesn't change the grinding feelings of anxiety, failure and fear of judgment that rear up when we don't live up to our own expectations. If you are vulnerable to perfectionism you run yourself absolutely ragged attempting to live up to some impossible standard. But then messy, freewheeling life inevitably sideswipes your efforts. Your dinner party fails to meet your Pinterest-worthy standards, your garden is a weedy mess, your kids are grubby, or you're late again... and a black hole of guilt and shame rises up inside you, making it difficult to enjoy the beauty and goodness that also exists in your imperfect world. Many people who struggle perfectionism are incredibly competent, thoughtful, and thorough in everything that they do. However they can put SO much time and energy over-focusing on small details, it can make even the simplest projects seem overwhelming. The result, ironically, is procrastination, which leads to not having enough time to do a good job, which leads to more imperfection and feelings of shame and failure. If perfectionism gets too powerful it can lead to total avoidance of tasks: Piles of unfolded laundry, tons of clutter, unfinished household projects, and even serious problems at work or school are the hallmarks of a severe case of perfectionism. 3 Keys to Overcoming Perfectionism The good news? Perfectionism CAN be overcome. I know this, because in addition to working with many people who have struggled with and conquered perfectionism, I'm a perfectionist (in recovery) myself. This episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast is all about how to help you overcome the anxiety and self-judgment that leads to perfectionism, and start enjoying you're life again. (And being more successful, productive and effective in the process). Listen and learn the three new ideas that will help you overcome perfectionism: Can you relate to perfectionism? Is it something that you're currently struggling with, or something that you've already overcome? Either way, I hope you share your story in the comment section of this post! http://www.growingself.com/overcoming-perfectionism/ -- xo, Lisa Marie

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#311 - Six Signs Your Relationship is In Trouble

#311 - Six Signs Your Relationship is In Trouble

All couples have differences, and having “spirited conversations” (aka, “conflict”) as you work towards resolving them is a normal part of every healthy relationship. That said, there are certain types of relationship conflict and emotional experiences that you should never minimize, or underestimate the importance of. These are the warning signs your relationship may be in real trouble, and when those are happening it's vital to deal with them. Understanding what they are can help you take positive action to repair your relationship so that you can heal your bond. Learn about the six signs your relationship is in trouble, and what to do if they’re present, on this episode of the podcast.  Your partner in growth,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

22 Aug 202259min

#310 - How to Deal With Trust Issues

#310 - How to Deal With Trust Issues

Is it hard for you to trust your partner, or feel secure with them? If you've ever caught yourself double checking them (and then wondering to yourself, "Do I have trust issues?") this podcast is for you. We're talking about what trust issues are (and what they are not), signs of trust issues, what causes trust issues, how unresolved trust issues damage relationships, and what you can do to overcome them — so you can feel confident and secure. Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby Ps: Access all the resources I mention in this podcast on the blog at GrowingSelf.com!

15 Aug 20221h

#309 - How to Stop Being Codependent

#309 - How to Stop Being Codependent

Are you in a codependent relationship? If so you're probably feeling anxious, frustrated, and exhausted from trying to create positive change in your relationship single-handedly. (Or feeling like you're never quite good enough to meet the standards of your partner). Not fun for anyone! On today's episode, we're taking a deep dive into codependent relationships. Listen, and learn: - What codependent relationships are - Why they happen - The stages of codependency recovery - How you can get un-fused from each other so that you can both grow and flourish. How to stop being codependent: All for you! xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

8 Aug 20221h 14min

#308 - Managing Up for Career Success

#308 - Managing Up for Career Success

Managing Up for Career Success Have you ever worked in a truly terrible environment? Think back to that job now. What made it so bad?  If you’re like most people, the difference between a great job and a horrible job doesn’t have all that much to do with the work itself. Instead, it usually comes down to your relationships with your coworkers — and especially your relationship with your boss.  Having a positive, healthy relationship with your boss, based on genuine trust and respect, makes your working life so much easier, and ultimately helps you both reach your career goals.  So how can you build that kind of relationship? And how can you repair your relationship with your boss if it’s not off to a great start?  On today's episode, we are talking about “managing up,” a professional development strategy that will help you build better working relationships, find more satisfaction on the job and remove the trickiest obstacles between you and your ultimate career goals.  In this episode, we discuss… [00:58] What Is Managing Up? [14:19] What Managing Up Is Not [24:15] Why Managing Up Matters [34:53] How to Manage Up at Work  My guest is Dr. Lisa S., PhD, LPC, CCC. She is a career coach and counselor at Growing Self, as well as the past president of both the National Career Development Association and the Colorado Career Development Association. Today, she shares her insight and wisdom with you.  I hope you’ll join the “Doctors Lisa” for this lively and useful conversation about building an empowered, satisfying career by learning how to manage up. Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

1 Aug 202254min

#306 - Is Jealousy Healthy in a Relationship?

#306 - Is Jealousy Healthy in a Relationship?

People often wonder, “Is jealousy healthy in a relationship?”  Here’s the short answer: It depends. Jealousy can be healthy when it signals that it’s time to draw your partner close in response to a real or imagined threat. This is a good thing that helps preserve and strengthen your relationship — but only if you’re able to handle jealousy in a self-aware, intentional way. When jealousy gets out of control (particularly if it’s due to past relational trauma, rather than a current relational threat), it can be a destructive force that harms your relationship, your partner, and you.  In this episode, we’re talking about jealousy’s ancient roots, when it’s healthy and when it’s a problem, and how you can use feelings of jealousy to start important conversations, establish healthy boundaries, and strengthen your relationship.  Tune in for a discussion about: [03:23] What is Romantic Jealousy? [09:49] What Causes Jealousy in a Relationship? [17:49] When Jealousy is Healthy  [23:56] What to Do When You’re Feeling Jealous [41:56] When Jealousy Turns Abusive [46:01] Learning from Your Jealousy And more!  Xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

18 Juli 202257min

#305 - The Power of Believing In Yourself

#305 - The Power of Believing In Yourself

“Believe in yourself” is more than a soundbite. It’s a necessary ingredient in a happy, self-directed life.  It’s also easier said than done. If you (like basically everyone) have internal narratives about the things you can’t do or changes you can’t make, you’re going to need more than a pep talk or some positive affirmations to shake those narratives loose. You’re going to need a self-belief-building plan.  On this episode of the podcast, we’re discussing how to believe in yourself, and the real steps you can take to build self-confidence, self-efficacy, and self-esteem, so you can start living life by your own design. Our guest is Elise R., M.Ed., NCC, CCC, LPCC. Elise is a therapist, life coach, and “holistic life design” expert here at Growing Self. After helping countless people build their self-belief and reach their most ambitious goals, she’s sharing her sage wisdom and actionable advice with you.  We are discussing: - Self-efficacy - Shifting internally - Raising kids that believe in themselves - Mastering experiences - Building an empowered career - and more!  I hope you enjoy this episode and find the power of believing in yourself! You deserve it.  With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

11 Juli 20221h 7min

#304 - Shifting From Emotional To Intuitive Eating

#304 - Shifting From Emotional To Intuitive Eating

Eating is one of the most basic ways we care for ourselves every day. But having an unhealthy relationship with food can leave you feeling stressed, emotionally drained, and bad about yourself, rather than nourished, energized and empowered.    Unfortunately, many of us have a fraught relationship with food. Emotional eating, shame, and anxiety around food or body image, and negative cultural messages about what we “should” be doing or how we “should” look, can get in the way of mindful, compassionate, and self-aware eating practices.    Intuitive eating is all about listening to yourself, trusting yourself, and having a positive relationship with the food that nourishes your body and brings you pleasure.    Today we're talking about how to shift from emotional to intuitive eating with an intuitive eating counselor who’s sharing some radical wisdom for making peace with food and your body. Tune in to learn all about:    [03:53] Emotional eating   [07:32] Unhealthy relationships with food   [17:06] Changing your relationship with food   [23:29] Adopting healthier coping mechanisms   And much more.     With love,    Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

4 Juli 202253min

#303 - Personality Type Compatibility in Relationships

#303 - Personality Type Compatibility in Relationships

Are we a good fit? Do we have enough in common? Is my partner really “The One?”  Personality type compatibility in relationships isn’t about being alike or agreeing on everything — it’s about learning to understand your differences and use them for the benefit of each other and the relationship.  In today's episode, you’ll learn all about what really makes a couple compatible, and how you can harness your differences for a stronger relationship. With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

27 Juni 202257min

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