#111 - Dating During The Holidays: 'Tis The Season... of Love

Breakups are brutal. I know you're wondering, “How long will it take before I finally feel like myself again?” Trust me, you’re not alone. In this episode, we’re diving deep into the million-dollar question: How long does it really take to get over a breakup? And, even more importantly, what do you need to DO in order to move forward and not get stuck in the past?  I'm joined by Kendra Allen, the amazing host of Breakup Bestie, and together we unpack the factors that impact your healing timeline. Spoiler alert: it’s different for everyone! But we’ve got insights, personal stories, and actionable advice to help you make sense of your own process and feel more empowered as you heal. We’re covering everything from how long it takes to feel "okay" again, to why some relationships hurt more than others, and how to know if you’re truly moving on. Plus, Kendra shares her journey of transformation after addiction and abusive relationships, offering you hope that growth is possible—even when it feels like the pain of heartbreak will never end. Join us to learn about: 00:00 – The Hardest Question After a Breakup: How Long Will This Take? 05:40 – Kendra’s Story: From Addiction to Empowerment 12:19 – Why Some Breakups Take Longer to Heal Than Others 19:32 – The Emotional Rollercoaster: What Healing Really Looks Like 29:00 – Handling Triggers: Holidays, Anniversaries & More 37:15 – How to Know if You’re Truly Healing or Just Surviving 45:20 – Next Steps: Tools and Advice for Moving On   If you’re hurting after heartbreak, this one’s for you. Thanks for tuning in, and/or for sharing this episode with a friend or loved one who is feeling stuck in heartbreak, and needs some direction for how to move forward.   xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby   PS: Want to see how far along you are in your breakup recovery? Take my free quiz, How Over Your Ex Are You? 👉 Take the Quiz Join me for a live Q&A this Thursday at 12 PM MT on YouTube, where we’ll tackle the topic of Getting Over Your Ex. Submit your questions anonymously in advance ( Ask Here) Or just jump into the conversation on Instagram, Facebook, or YouTube. See you there!

7 Okt 202453min

Friend, partner, or job said "thanks but no thanks"? Well, the joke's on them: If you know how to mine the gold in this opportunity it could wind up being the best thing that’s ever happened to YOU. And... Rejection sucks. Whether it’s from a friend, a romantic partner, or a job you really wanted, it can leave you feeling bruised and wondering, “Is it just me?” Guess what? It’s not just you, and it’s not the end of the world (promise!). 🌟 In fact, rejection can be the key to unlocking your most resilient, powerful self. Yeah, I said it! Join me as I break down the very real emotions behind rejection and share how you can use it as a springboard for serious personal growth. We’ll cover how rejection shows up in your personal, professional, and social life—and how to cope, heal, and come out stronger on the other side. Ready to transform those “no’s” into growth? Let’s do this! 🙌 What We’ll Cover: 00:00 - Rejection Feels Awful, But... Why rejection hits so hard and why it’s universal. 02:42 - Resilience & Growth: Your New Best Friends - Turning setbacks into setups for your future self.  12:47 - Friendship Rejection: Why Does This Hurt So Much? Handling the emotional sting of being ghosted or left out by friends.  20:28 - Heartbreak Hotel: Dealing with Romantic Rejection Why getting dumped can hurt on a primal level and how to come out of it stronger.  43:42 - Career Flops: Professional Rejection and What to Do Next Didn’t get the job? Fired? Here’s how to bounce back like a boss. 💼 51:45 - Your Rejection Recovery Plan: Next Steps Actionable strategies to heal and grow from any kind of rejection. 🔥 Bonus: Want to chat about your own experiences with rejection? Jump into this week’s live stream where we’ll be swapping stories, getting advice, and supporting each other! 🗓️ Submit your questions in advance right here. Want to start doing the work we're discussing today? Book a free consultation for coaching at GrowingSelf.com. xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby #RejectionRecovery #EmotionalResilience #LoveHappinessSuccess #PersonalGrowth

30 Sep 202458min

Let’s get real for a minute—have you ever found yourself thinking, "I have no sex drive," and feeling completely stuck about what to do next? You’re not alone. So many people are struggling with this exact issue, and today, I’m diving deep into why that happens, how it affects your relationship, and most importantly—what you can do about it. In this episode, I’m joined by Allison Gilbert, co-author with the iconic Dr. Ruth Westheimer on her last book "The Joy of Connections." We’ll explore how a lack of intimacy in your relationship can leave you feeling lost, but we’re also unpacking Dr. Ruth’s brilliant “menu for connection.” It’s full of ways to reignite your bond—not just in the bedroom, but through shared activities, better communication, and ultimately, deeper self-reflection. We’ll tackle some tough love truths (like the role self-love plays in intimacy), and I’ll share actionable strategies to help you reconnect with your partner, starting today. Episode Breakdown: [00:00] – Where’s the Spark? Why so many people feel disconnected from their partners—and how it happens more often than you think. [00:47] – Dr. Ruth’s Secret Sauce The first thing to check when your sex drive is gone—your relationship dynamics! [02:09] – It’s Not Them, It’s You? The surprising role self-love plays in keeping intimacy alive. [03:47] – The “Menu for Connection” Five elements Dr. Ruth swears by to build a richer, more meaningful connection with your partner. [05:47] – Fun Outside the Bedroom How activities like pickleball (yes, pickleball!) could reignite the flames of passion. [08:06] – What’s Really Going On? Digging deeper: how emotional barriers like resentment might be blocking your connection. [12:41] – Therapy or Time to Move On? When it’s time to seek help—or even consider a bigger decision. [15:41] – You Deserve Better Dr. Ruth’s empowering message: You deserve happiness, fun, and great sex—don’t settle for less. [17:16] – Let’s Wrap This Up! Final thoughts and inspiration to help you take that first step toward a better, more intimate relationship. Tune in, share your thoughts, and let’s create a life full of love, connection, and fun together!   Xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby   P.S. ⭐ Ready for more? ⭐ Download my free guide, "Communication that Connects," to start having meaningful conversations that build closeness in your relationship. And don’t forget to join me for this week’s live stream on Thursday at 12 PM MT—we’ll dive even deeper into intimacy and connection. Submit your anonymous questions ahead of time right here! P. P.S: Who else in your life needs to hear this message today? Forward this episode to them and feel good about being a positive “change agent” in the lives of others. You and I are on the same mission my friend! Xo, L

23 Sep 202425min

Where did everyone go?? At some point, many/most adults look up one day to realize that all their old friends have either moved to Austin or are completely buried in #babylife or never-ending home improvement projects… and they have nobody to spontaneously get a beer with on a Tuesday night. Can you relate? It's not just you. Did you know that, on average, most people lose more friends every year than they gain? Over time, your life can become increasingly lonely unless you’re actively working to build and maintain friendships. But here’s the thing: making new friends as an adult is harder than it sounds. 😅 In this episode of Love, Happiness, and Success, we dive deep into the complexities of adult friendships with journalist Kelly Stout, who spent a month trying to make just one new friend… and learned some important things that she’s sharing with YOU.  From the unexpected emotional hurdles to the surprising lessons about vulnerability and connection, we explore what it really takes to form meaningful relationships in adulthood. 💛 If you’ve ever struggled with loneliness, wondered why your social circle shrinks as the years go by, or just feel stuck when it comes to making new friends, this episode is for you. 🙌 Chapters 00:00 Can Happiness Really Be Found Through Friendships? 00:19 Why Your Friendships Are More Important Than You Think 00:58 Meet Kelly Stout: Her One-Month Quest to Make a New Friend 02:30 What Happens When You Set a Deadline to Make a Friend? 04:58 The Hidden Challenges of Building Friendships as an Adult 12:55 What Actually Defines a True Friendship? 15:40 Friendship Experiments: What Works and What Doesn’t 18:32 Why Opening Up to Others Feels So Scary—And Necessary 22:33 The Biggest Lessons We Learned About Friendship 25:01 When Friendships Feel Fleeting: Why It Happens 25:45 Vulnerability Hangover: Ever Felt It? Here’s Why It Happens 25:56 Turning Points: When You Realize You’re Doing Friendship All Wrong 26:33 Can You Fast-Track Emotional Intimacy? Let’s Find Out 27:18 Why We Gravitate Toward People Just Like Us—And What to Do About It 27:45 Discovering the Power of Friendships with People Who Are Different 28:19 The Comfort and Complexity of Long-Term Friendships 29:53 Bumble for Friends: Can You Really Make Friends on an App? 32:01 How Internalized Shame is Holding You Back from Friendship 34:03 The Reality of Keeping Friendships Alive as an Adult 43:57 Why We Crave Community—and How to Build One 47:01 Modern Loneliness: Why Life is Designed to Keep Us Isolated 53:44 Final Reflections: How to Create Real Friendships That Last 💡 Learn how to overcome the struggles of making friends as an adult and build a community that brings joy and connection back into your life. xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby PS: I think you and I should be friends! Come hang out with me on a Thursday live stream! Mark your calendar right now, it's at 12pm MT / 2pm ET on my Instagram, Youtube, and Facebook. This week we're talking about friendships. If you have a question or conundrum related to this, here's the link to ask in advance: https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa. Be sure to subscribe/follow so you get updates and recaps! P.P.S. As promised in this podcast, here's the link to grab your totally free and VAST collection of all my best articles and podcasts on the subject of healthy relationships. I made it for YOU.

16 Sep 20241h 1min

Could you be accidentally and unintentionally DESTROYING your relationship? Pro tip from a marriage counselor: Many, many people are... and literally have no idea.  I think I know why. Everyone with an Instagram account is posting things about what they think you should do to have a great relationship—communication tips, romantic date ideas, etc.—but let’s be real... sometimes, it's more important to know what NOT to do! And nobody talks about that!!  That’s why today, we’re flipping the script on the usual relationship advice you hear. 💥 In this episode, we’re breaking down the 12 Most Effective Ways to Destroy Your Relationship (so you can avoid them like the plague). Trust me, as a marriage counselor, I’ve seen it all. Whether it’s neglecting your partner or constantly blaming your “issues” when you behave badly, even the strongest couples can unknowingly make these mistakes. But don’t worry, I’m not here to throw shade—I'm here to help you laugh, learn, and most importantly, grow! 🌱 By the end of this, you’ll not only recognize these pitfalls, but also walk away with actionable tips to make sure you’re NOT sabotaging your love life. 🙌 Here's what you'll learn: ⏱️ 00:00 Intro: The 12 Biggest Relationship Mistakes 02:36 Mistake #12: Making the Relationship ALL About You 04:36 Mistake #11: Blaming Everything on Your Issues 08:26 Mistake #10: Neglecting Your Partner (The Silent Killer) 11:20 Mistake #9: Too Much Togetherness (Yikes!) And all the way down... to the number one biggest relationship killer!  💬 Let’s talk: Have you fallen into any of these traps? What’s one mistake you’re guilty of? Drop a comment on Instagram @drlisamariebobby —I’d love to hear from you! AND if you want to get my perspective on some not-so-fantastic things that might be happening in your relationship (and how to make it stop) join me on Thursday for a live stream on this topic! Use this link to ask your Q and get reminders to join on Thursday at 12 pm MT / 2pm ET. https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa If you're feeling like, "uh oh" after hearing this... you're not alone! I’ve helped thousands of couples turn things around, and you can too. 🌟 Xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby 💡 PS: If you're ready to start working on some positive new communication tools after hearing about the not great ones, check out my FREE training, “Communication That Connects” — it’s packed with tools to help you strengthen your connection and communicate like a pro!

9 Sep 202451min

🎧 Forget Everything You Knew About Anxiety – This Changes Everything! 🎧 Ever feel like anxiety has a grip on your life? Here’s the game-changing truth: You can heal anxietyy, not just manage the symptoms. 💥 In this transformative episode of the Love, Happiness, and Success podcast, I sit down with the brilliant Dr. Nicole Cain, a holistic anxiety expert and author of the upcoming book Panic Proof, to discuss a revolutionary approach to healing anxiety from the inside out. 🌱 👉 Imagine freeing yourself from anxiety by nurturing your body, mind, and soul. Together, we dive into practical strategies that blend psychology and holistic medicine to uncover the root causes of anxiety and address them at the deepest level. We even explore how anxiety shows up in relationships and, yes, even in the bedroom! 💡 What You'll Learn Today:  00:00 The Truth About Healing Anxiety, Naturally  00:18 Dr. Nicole's Story 12:28 Understanding Anxiety and Its Roots  19:22 Esme’s Story: A Powerful Case Study  33:54 Anxiety in Relationships & Sexuality  42:43 Dr. Nicole's Three-Minute Hack for Instant Anxiety Relief  50:39 How the Salience Network Impacts Anxiety  54:30 VERY Generous Offer from Dr. Nicole! ✨ And... I'm so thrilled to share that Dr. Nicole will be my guest host on this week's live stream, and available to answer YOUR questions. Join us Thursday 9/5 at 12 PM MT on my YouTube, Instagram, or Facebook. Want a reminder or to ask a Q in advance? Get that set up right here: www.growingself.com/dear-lisa.  🙌 If you missed the chance to hop on with us LIVE you can catch the recap video right here starting 9/6: https://www.growingself.com/natural-anxiety-relief 🎥 Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share this episode with anyone you know who’s struggling with anxiety—this could be the breakthrough they’ve been waiting for! Your partner in growth,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

2 Sep 20241h 3min

Wondering why your therapist acts a little... strange? What are all those long, awkward silences about? Why won't they follow you on social media? You made DIRECT EYE CONTACT with them at the grocery store but they didn't acknowledge your presence. Why?? In this episode, we’re diving into the surprising truth behind therapist boundaries and why they matter for your personal growth.  In this episode of Love, Happiness, and Success, I’m pulling back the curtain on some of the “weird” things therapists do (like, why won’t they just give you a hug already?!), and why those boundaries are actually super important for your healing journey. We’ll also break down the difference between therapy and coaching, why therapists never give direct advice, and how these boundaries create a safe, effective space for you to thrive. Plus, I’m sharing insights that will help you build a strong, healthy relationship with your therapist. If you're in therapy, you’ll walk away with some major a-ha moments! Timestamps: 00:00 - Let’s Get Real: Why Do Therapists Have Such Weird Boundaries? 02:25 - The Surprising Power of Therapist Boundaries 06:43 - Why Your Therapist Won’t Steer the Conversation (Hint: It’s for YOU) 09:10 - Therapist vs. Coach: Which One Do You Really Need? 12:35 - The Ethics Behind the Scenes: How Good Therapists Keep You Safe 24:25 - Why Your Therapist Stays Neutral (Even When It Feels Weird) 31:55 - Session Time Limits & Contact Rules—What’s Up with That? 35:51 - The Secret to a Healthy Therapist-Client Relationship 45:44 - Wrap Up: Final Thoughts and Takeaways Wanna Learn More? Signs You Have a Bad Therapist How to Find a Good Therapist Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and hit the bell so you never miss an episode on all things therapy, coaching, and personal growth! Let’s keep this conversation going! 💖

26 Aug 202450min

Ready to shake off low self esteem for good, and grow into the confident, competent person you want to be? Good news: Confidence isn't born, it's BUILT, meaning you have more control over how you feel about yourself than you might think. On today’s podcast you’ll learn the essence of authentic self-worth, and how to grow into the kind of person that exudes confidence (in a good way). As a licensed psychologist, marriage and family therapist, and board-certified coach, I’m sharing why confidence isn’t just a feeling you magically have—it’s something you build through consistent, value-driven actions.  Together, we’ll explore practical ways to develop self-respect, trust your judgment, and foster a deep-rooted belief in your worth. Whether you're looking to overcome self-doubt or grow into the confident person you aspire to be, this episode offers steps you can start taking today. Here’s what you’ll learn: 00:00 Introduction to Authentic Confidence 01:43 Understanding Authentic Confidence 04:23 Building Confidence Through Actions 06:12 Overcoming Misconceptions About Confidence 07:53 Identifying and Aligning with Your Values 13:26 Personal Story: The Journey to Self-Respect 17:10 Developing a Growth Mindset 34:50 Practical Tips for Exuding Confidence 44:42 Conclusion and Free Resources Want more guidance? Join me LIVE on Thursday for a Q&A, where I’ll answer your questions about building confidence and self-esteem. Submit your questions in advance through https://www.growingself.com/dear-lisa for personalized advice! Don’t forget to take our free "How Healthy Is Your Self-Esteem?" quiz at https://www.growingself.com/self-esteem-test/ to see where you stand and discover next steps for boosting your self-worth. See you there! 👏💪 #Confidence #SelfEsteem #ExudeConfidence #PersonalGrowth #LiveQandA #GrowingSelf

19 Aug 202451min