210:  Well-meaning organization getting off-course, Personality cancer

210: Well-meaning organization getting off-course, Personality cancer

In today's show, Dr. Howk discusses the following questions: 1. I belong to a professional organization that has been working to root out genuine problems with racism, albeit in fits and starts. But lately it feels as though the tone has devolved from one of problem-solving to grievance-seeking and grievance-magnification. The communications have been hijacked by highly disagreeable and/or highly neurotic individuals, plus those who are gaining status as lead torchbearer. A few have said they'd rather destroy the organization than be part of one which hasn't achieved their goals for diversity, even if said organization was doing good advocacy work for others. Is there any coming back from this? All pleas for mutual respect and professionalism are decried as tone-policing and their originators as enablers and bigots. Anything I can do besides keep my tongue tucked and eyes on my own work? Thank you for your thoughts! I'm grateful to this podcast for giving some psychological distance from the ongoing shit show. 2. Dr. Lisle has mentioned the concept of "internal ugliness" a couple of times in previous shows. How does one go about identifying their own internal ugliness, and then mitigating or correcting it?

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Avsnitt(402)

386: How to Handle Bad Advice Without a Fight

386: How to Handle Bad Advice Without a Fight

What do you say when a friend or family member recommends horse-assisted coaching, family constellations therapy, or the latest protein fix for your problems? Evolutionary psychologist Dr. Doug Lisle ...

10 Juli 45min

385: It's Not the Men. It's Who You Keep Choosing.

385: It's Not the Men. It's Who You Keep Choosing.

A listener who knows evolutionary psychology well asks Dr. Doug Lisle a painful question. If men seem satisfied once they have food and sex, and never care about her inner life, is she fighting a losi...

26 Juni 1h 12min

384: What Looks Like a Flaw Is Actually a Strategy

384: What Looks Like a Flaw Is Actually a Strategy

Why do some people freeze when they try to speak up in a group, while others jump in without a second thought? Dr. Doug Lisle says it is not shyness or a confidence problem you can train away. It is y...

10 Juni 1h 5min

Why Your Bad Moods Are Never Random

Why Your Bad Moods Are Never Random

A listener noticed their kid gets dissatisfied after too much screen time and asked Dr. Lisle a deeper question: when your mood feels off, is it always worth analyzing, or are some bad moods just rand...

3 Juni 1h 9min

Perfect on Paper, But Not for Me - Mate Value, Attraction, and the Disagreeable Personality

Perfect on Paper, But Not for Me - Mate Value, Attraction, and the Disagreeable Personality

Most people assume mate value is a fixed, rankable number and that attraction follows logically from it. Dr. Lisle says that is the wrong model entirely. Mate value has deep objectivity across a popul...

13 Maj 1h

When the Marriage Is Over, but the Mortgage Isn't

When the Marriage Is Over, but the Mortgage Isn't

Most people think a marriage in trouble can be downgraded into a business arrangement to protect the house. Dr. Lisle says that is the previous investment trap talking, not your judgment. The four wal...

29 Apr 50min

380: You're Not Overreacting About Your Partner (Here's why)

380: You're Not Overreacting About Your Partner (Here's why)

Your partner's habits are driving you crazy and asking nicely isn't working. The common advice is to be more patient, communicate better, or just accept your partner as they are. Dr. Lisle says that's...

15 Apr 1h 7min

379: Why Your Partner Stopped Trying (It's Not What You Think)

379: Why Your Partner Stopped Trying (It's Not What You Think)

Most people assume that whoever cares less in a relationship holds the power. In this episode, Dr. Doug Lisle explains why that framing gets it completely backwards. What people call the "care gap" is...

2 Apr 1h

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