119: Success Story with Kenna and Dave – From Near Divorce to Connection and Safety
Have you ever contemplated ending your relationship because of the hurt and pain you’re feeling? Or because of broken communication that leads to fights or distance and you're not sure how to repair your marriage, despite everything that you've tried? You’re not alone. So many couples get stuck in negative cycles that break down their love and relationship, leading to resentment and distance. I had the awesome opportunity to work with a couple who reached out right on the brink of divorce after having done multiple programs, therapy, and no matter what they did, it just wasn’t working. So I knew we had to take a totally different approach, and if you listen back on episode 108 - I actually took you behind the scenes and recorded a session that this couple and I had together so you could get a sense of how these tools apply to a difficult, real life situation. So in less than 3 months, this couple went from almost getting divorced to feeling so excited and connected in their relationship. And this episode today is a conversation I had with them where they share how they got there, what were the most helpful things they did on the journey, how he created safety in their marriage, and the totally different way they learned to process the triggers that used to cause arguments in the past. For therapy with Sam: Send an email here to get more information – sam@healingcouples.org Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support: https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners? Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
16 Nov 202343min
118: When She Says, “If You Loved Me, You Never Would Have Watched Pornography”
When a man struggles with pornography, addiction or habit, it’s devastating to his wife. She will express her hurt and pain to him hoping that the behavior will stop, but when it continues to happen, it creates hopelessness and despair. In those moments, it's easy for her to interpret the situation as ‘he doesn’t love me or care about me, what’s why he keeps doing it.’ When that is how she interprets his behavior, that creates even more pain in her heart. But what if there was a different way to understand this situation and why he’s doing this? In this episode, I share one of the best ways I’ve seen couples navigate this issue, develop a stronger bond between each other, and create closure from the past. For therapy with Sam: Send an email here to get more information – sam@healingcouples.org Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support: https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners? Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
8 Nov 202329min
117: How to Eliminate the Desire for Pornography So You Can Feel ”Normal”
Imagine what life would feel like if you didn’t have any desire to look at pornography. You just simply had no interest in it anymore? What if you just felt “normal” and could just go about your day without worrying about temptations and urges? Well, it’s possible. And it’s one of the best feelings in the world. In this episode I want to share with you exactly how you can achieve that and leverage that heart change to create safety and trust in your marriage How can you achieve this? The desire for porn will go away when your inner void is filled with something that actually meets your needs. So many men use porn as a method of filling their internal void, but it just doesn’t work. In this episode, I share with you three specific examples of clients who had different voids and how they resolved them in a healthy way. For therapy with Sam: Send an email here to get more information – sam@healingcouples.org Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support: https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners? Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
2 Nov 202322min
116: If a Wife Has Unmet Expectations and a Husband Feels Like His Efforts Aren’t Enough
When working to overcome pornography addiction or habit, it’s easy for expectations to not be met.. This work is difficult, and if a wife has expectations of him sharing, growing, and improving, but his capacity is limited, there can be a breakdown in the marriage. She might feel like he’s not really trying and that he doesn’t care about her. He can feel like no matter what he does, it’ll never be good enough. And when couples get caught in this type of spiral, it actually de-motivates and discourages action and progress. In this episode, I share with you a new way of looking at this so that both a husband and wife can feel progress at every phase of the journey, regardless of whether the expectations are met or not. For therapy with Sam: Send an email here to get more information – sam@healingcouples.org Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support: https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners? Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
26 Okt 202321min
115: When Saying How You Feel Leads to a Fight
When couples are working through the impact of pornography addiction, communication is so important to resolve painful and sensitive issues. But what, if sharing how you feel ends up in a fight? This is exactly what we were talking about in today's episode, and I'll share with your tools and strategies to approach these conversations differently. This can help you find closure and repair the damage that is causing a wall between you and your spouse. For therapy with Sam: Send an email here to get more information – sam@healingcouples.org Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support: https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners? Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
20 Okt 202324min
114: Avoid This Thought Pattern So You Can Overcome Pornography and Betrayal Trauma
It's easy for people to get stuck in a negative thought patterns that increase depression, hopelessness, and feeling paralyzed. When's the last time you thought something like, "I'm a failure," "there's no way I can quit porn," "everything in our marriage has been a lie"? In a couple of recent sessions I had with people, a common theme emerged that was keeping them stuck in how they assessed and thought about situations in their lives. These disempowering thought pattern happens all the time to so many people. In this episode, you'll learn what that thought pattern is (and you're probably doing without knowing) and how you can eliminate it and find the healing you need.
12 Okt 202322min
113: You’ll Never Overcomes Pornography With This Subconscious Belief
If you’ve ever felt depressed after another relapse and you’ve thought that quitting pornography isn’t possible, then this episode is for you. I had a session with a client that was a keystone moment in his life and journey to quitting porn and I wanted to share with you what broke an old limiting belief he had that caused lots of setbacks. In this episode I share how having subconscious beliefs will totally prevent you from finding freedom such as “I’ll never be able to quit” or “this is something I’ll have to deal with forever” Learning how to identify and break these limiting beliefs is the pathway to leaving porn behind you without ever going back. For therapy with Sam: Send an email here to get more information – sam@healingcouples.org Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support: https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners? Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
5 Okt 202326min
112: Avoid Emotional Spirals With This New Approach
Our emotional state determines the quality of our life. Yet, most people allow the external world to determine their emotional responses. One of the most valuable skills that people can learn is how to work through negative emotions, quickly, maintain a feeling of calm, control, and inner peace. In this episode, I share with you a new approach that can help you work through uncomfortable or difficult events without letting your emotions spiral. For therapy with Sam: Send an email here to get more information – sam@healingcouples.org Follow Me on Instagram for daily tips and tools you can implement to overcome pornography addiction Join the free, private men’s Facebook community here for Q&As, live trainings, tools, and support: https://www.facebook.com/groups/toolstoquit Want access to a free course I created for my podcast listeners? Simply go to www.coupleshealing.org and in the course you'll learn some top strategies to find healing from addiction and trauma, rebuild trust, experience freedom, and begin to reconnect with each other in the relationship.
29 Sep 202315min
