Why We Don’t Change (and what you can do about it) with Dr. Ross Ellenhorn

Why We Don’t Change (and what you can do about it) with Dr. Ross Ellenhorn

Why does change feel so difficult, even when we desperately want it? Dr. Ross Ellenhorn joins the show to explore our resistance to change, and the many good reasons we might have to stay just as we are. Forrest and Dr. Ellenhorn discuss the “fear of hope,” the allure of sameness, and what actually helps people develop the confidence to make meaningful changes in their lives. Topics include challenging conventional self-help wisdom, existential dread, dealing with disappointment, major issues in social work, psychedelics, and self-compassion. About our Guest: Ross Ellenhorn is a psychotherapist and sociologist, the owner and CEO of Ellenhorn, a community-integration program offering services for individuals experiencing addictive behaviors or extreme and complex states of mind and mood, and the author of three books including How We Change (and Ten Reasons Why We Don’t). You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:00: How Dr. Ross’s background in social work influences his outlook on change 6:20: What makes people want to stay the same 18:00: Self-efficacy, faith, and making hope big 24:55: Seeing your problems as solutions 30:00: Grappling with existential anxiety 34:20: The shock of recognition, and connecting with motivations through dialog 40:25: Managing disappointment 43:20: Psychosocial rehab, and the changing definition of mental health 52:55: Psychedelics and direct action 1:04:30: Recap I am now writing on Substack, check out my work there. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors Use promo code hanson at the link below to get an exclusive 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/hanson. Sign up for a one-dollar-per-month trial period at shopify.com/beingwell. Trust your gut with Seed’s DS-01 Daily Synbiotic. Go to Seed.com/BEINGWELL and use code 25BEINGWELL to get 25% off your first month. Transform your health with the ZOE Science & Nutrition podcast. Find it wherever you listen to podcasts. OneSkin focuses on delivering more than superficial results for your skin. Get started today with 15% off using code BEINGWELL at oneskin.co. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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 People Pleasing, AI Therapy, and Sexual Transference: May Mailbag

People Pleasing, AI Therapy, and Sexual Transference: May Mailbag

In this very fun episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest open the mailbag and answer questions from listeners about people pleasing, the potential (and pitfalls) of using AI as a therapist, and what to do when ...

26 Maj 20251h 17min

Disorganized Attachment: Heal By Embracing Your Needs

Disorganized Attachment: Heal By Embracing Your Needs

Dr. Rick and Forrest explore disorganized, or “fearful,” attachment. This complex style occurs when emotional intimacy and distance both feel uncomfortable, and typically arises based on difficult lif...

19 Maj 20251h 12min

Living with Depression with Dr. Scott Eilers

Living with Depression with Dr. Scott Eilers

Forrest is joined by clinical psychologist Dr. Scott Eilers to explore how he both treats and lives with chronic depression. They discuss anhedonia, the catch-22 of treatment resistance, how to build ...

12 Maj 20251h 13min

Live Show: Yung Pueblo on Relationships, Change, and Mindfulness

Live Show: Yung Pueblo on Relationships, Change, and Mindfulness

Forrest is joined by poet and author Diego Perez - better known as Yung Pueblo - for a live conversation recorded at City Arts & Lectures in San Francisco. They reunite the sensitive boys club to talk...

5 Maj 20251h 6min

How to Change Your Personality with Olga Khazan

How to Change Your Personality with Olga Khazan

Can we really change our personalities? In this episode, Forrest is joined by someone who’s actually tried most of the things we talk about on the podcast: journalist and author Olga Khazan. Olga shar...

28 Apr 20251h 14min

Your Parents Are Emotionally Immature. Now What? w/ Dr. Lindsay Gibson

Your Parents Are Emotionally Immature. Now What? w/ Dr. Lindsay Gibson

Dr. Lindsay Gibson joins Forrest to explore emotional immaturity, the consequences of growing up with emotionally immature caregivers, and what we can do to change those patterns in adulthood. They di...

21 Apr 20251h 20min

Self-Concept: The Secret to Changing WHO You Are

Self-Concept: The Secret to Changing WHO You Are

Forrest and Dr. Rick explore how self-concept, the invisible architecture of who we are, shapes our lives. They discuss how identity can become a cage, the unconscious beliefs we have about who we are...

14 Apr 20251h 7min

Linking: The Secret to Rewiring Painful Memories

Linking: The Secret to Rewiring Painful Memories

Forrest and Dr. Rick explore one of his most powerful psychological tools: linking. Over time, linking can help us rewire the brain, softening the impact of painful memories. They discuss the neurosci...

7 Apr 20251h 10min

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