227 - A Mothers Shame

"Hello Sandman, I was wondering if you could give advice to college level MGTOW's on how prevent their parents, especially mothers, shaming them for being single." Well, thanks for your question Dave I'll do my best trying to answer it. First of all college or University is a major right of passage into adulthood in North American society. There's the prom and high school graduation and then comes college. And your parents are seeing these rights of passage go by and they think to themselves, my child is going to meet someone and get married and have grandchildren. So you are messing with the rights of passage that they expect you to go through. And remember Dave, your parents probably had you around the time they were twenty five or thirty years of age. To them it's expected that you're going to do the same thing, marry and have kids in the next five to ten years. Many mothers also see their sons as an insurance policy. Someone to help out if things get tough in the future. Someone to help keep them from being lonely. Someone to pass on their DNA. Someone to visit

them when they are in the nursing home. And remember up until you went to college your parents might have seen you as their property. Not a human being but something to be coddled and looked after. And they made decisions for you most of your life and now they expect you to make the decision of finding a life partner and you're not doing that. You've chosen to go off the scripted life plan. You are rebelling against their plans for you. They don't understand that you are a man going his own way. And they probably wouldn't understand what that means even if you explained it to them. You need to accept that they will never accept you and they need to agree to disagree with you. I know that's easier said then done but that's what needs to happen. And you have to either let the shame roll off your back and play nice or you can strike back every-time your mother shames you by pointing out other bad relationships and divorces that everyone in your family sees. And just tell your mother you don't want to end up like that. And you can even say that you don't think you could go on living if that ever happened to you. Remember your mother fears only one thing more then you not getting married and having children. And that's your untimely death or if you abandon her and never speak to her again. And in the worst case scenario if your mother refuses to get off your back and continues to pester you

all the time, you can threaten to go your own way from her. I'm not suggesting this and am just saying it as the last or worst case scenario. What I want to see you do is stand up for yourself. Build your self confidence and when she shames you I want you to call her on what she's doing. My mother is predictable.

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