77. Unlock Joy and Resilience: The Power of Celebrating Everyday Wins

Listen, there's no good girl star. So, how about we prioritize our happiness and only let kind people into our lives? This is the topic I'm covering today, as the mantra "let them" became my go-to the other week. You might already be familiar with Mel Robbins' "Let Them" philosophy, which can lessen overwhelm and improve relationships. The theory she explores in her book, "Let Them," is that we will feel less stress and have better relationships if we let others be who they are, without any interference or judgement. And in this episode of The Overwhelm Cure, we explore this concept as a practical strategy to reduce our stress and overwhelm so we can free up mental space and energy to look after ourselves. "Letting them" requires us to fully accept people and their choices. I get it, it can be hard when we disagree with the decisions or actions of loved ones or friends. But then, there's the freedom we experience when we get to focus on ourselves and take care of our needs. Key Takeaways: Breaking down Mel Robbins' "Let Them" theory helps us let go and allow others to be themselves, making their own choices and effectively taking the stress and pressure off ourselves. We often try to change others in an effort to control them, thinking it'll lead to our own peace and happiness. BUT — this usually robs us of our unique journey and learnings while increasing our stress. By adopting the "Let Them" approach, we take our power back and can shift our focus from controlling others to managing our own reactions — freeing up the mental and emotional energy that we'd otherwise spend getting frustrated and angry. Going beyond "Let Them" and using "Let Me" when we need to take actions to protect ourselves, such as setting boundaries, having direct conversations, or limiting contact. Putting our mental health and wellness first, we evaluate relationships, recognize when they're depleting rather than nurturing, and make choices that prioritize our peace. This episode will help you understand how to apply the "Let Them" and "Let Me" principles to create more calm, peaceful, and fulfilling relationships in your life. Quick Links: Work with me 1:1 The Overwhelm Cure Program Mel Robbins "Let Them" Theory Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction to Overcoming Overwhelm 00:46 Identifying Sources of Frustration 02:40 The Concept of 'Let Them' 05:03 Accepting Others and Focusing on Ourselves 08:02 Implementing 'Let Them' in Real Life 09:07 Going Beyond 'Let Them' 10:50 Setting Boundaries with 'Let Me' 15:11 Final Thoughts and Invitation Connect with Kimberly Knull: Sign up for the next Dare To Lead Workshop Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram

8 Sep 19min

Today I'm talking about something incredibly simple yet profoundly impactful: checking in. Recently, my oldest daughter moved out for university, and it was a surprisingly difficult experience for me.  What truly helped actually surprised me.  A friend picked up the phone (like with an actual call) to see how I was doing. It was such a small gesture, but it made me feel so cared for. It really meant a lot to me. As parents, professionals, or even just women who spend a lot of time and energy looking after others, we often don't get that same care in return. That's why I'm realizing the importance of us taking the time to check in on each other.  Whether it's a quick call or even a text message, it can make someone's day. Really, it's a highly underrated yet essential way to connect and nurture the people we care about.  As a psychologist, I see firsthand how loneliness is a real and growing problem — even an epidemic in many countries.  What I'm doing:  I've found it helpful to keep a list of people I want to connect with more often. Then, I schedule time to reach out to them to check in and, in some cases, make plans. If you find yourself craving more connection and even deeper connections, be the one to reach out. As nice as it would be, our loved ones can't read our minds.  So, don't be afraid to reach out and ask a friend if they'd like to grab a coffee.  Here's what you'll find in today's episode: A simple check-in can take 30 seconds and be the thing that completely uplifts someone's mood. How I'm nurturing my connections today: Reaching out demonstrates that we value people — we're investing our time and energy. How a quick text, email, or phone call can help lessen feelings of loneliness. Why, if you're craving connection, I invite you to take the initiative and be the one who reaches out. A reminder that if your friends and family aren't checking in on you, don't take it personally. Don't be afraid to ask for support when you need it. How checking in on others not only helps them but also contributes to your own happiness and well-being. Timestamps:  00:00 Introduction & Watching My Daughter Move Away for College 01:47 The Importance of Checking In 03:43 The Power of Connection 08:56 Practical Tips for Reaching Out 13:55 Building and Maintaining Relationships 17:31 Overcoming Loneliness and Expanding Your Network 19:31 Acts of Kindness 21:26 Final Thoughts and Professional Support Quick Links: Sign up for the next Dare To Lead Workshop Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram

4 Sep 23min

Just because you've always done something doesn't make it a good reason to keep doing it. I'm bringing this idea with me into the changing seasons, as we sadly say goodbye to summer fun and travel, and transition into fall. Whether the kids are going back to school or, in my case, one is heading off to college, it's a season to review what's been working and what needs to change to close out the rest of the year intentionally. September often feels like a fresh start, like a "new year" without the countdown and ball drop — making it the perfect season to reevaluate all our routines.  All of my clients are working to make improvements in at least one area of their lives, and this seasonal shift brings an excellent opportunity to review our priorities and embrace some new habits and routines that foster personal growth. And I'm right there with them reviewing what's been working well and what needs to change. That's why, this week, I'm sharing four simple strategies to help you create intentional and positive changes this fall. Here's what you'll hear today: Why fall is an excellent time to establish new, intentional routines. The importance of routines in conserving mental energy and reducing daily decision-making. How small, consistent actions are more effective than infrequent, large efforts. Why choosing how you'll FEEL is the most important choice in guiding your daily habits. An invitation to challenge all the external "shoulds" and prioritize the habits that genuinely serve you. The key to making habits stick for the long run. Timestamps:  00:00 Introduction: Wrapping Up Summer 00:18 Embracing Fall and Its Changes 01:06 The Importance of Routines 03:00 Creating Effective Habits 05:32 Setting Intentions for Fall 09:48 Evaluating and Adjusting Your Fall Routine 12:59 Practical Tips for Daily Habits 16:23 Conclusion: Make Intentional Choices Quick Links: Sign up for the next Dare To Lead Workshop Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram Related Episodes: 31: Beat Decision Fatigue & Make Better Choices 21: Navigating Life Transitions: How to Cope with Overwhelm 15. How To Create Healthy Daily Routines To Reduce Stress and Overwhelm

25 Aug 17min

"It's the most wonderful time of the year!" These are the sentiments from many parents as their kids head back to school. But for some, it's not quite the best time of the year. Here in Canada, the weather hasn't been cooperating. Though of course, as Canadians, we know we can get fresh air in any weather with the appropriate clothing. Barring the rainy summer weather, some of the clients I've been talking with are feeling: Stressed from summer vacations and having to change plans while navigating the pressure to make everyone happy Overwhelmed with planning when things don't work out "perfectly" Challenged by the tests of parenting, from entertaining young kids to changing roles and becoming more of a coach and mentor to your older kids Even if you've been having some challenges over the summer, these are actually a positive thing. We can learn some essential lessons from the ups and downs of parenting, co-parenting, and life with our families. Consider it a stress test for your family and your life. Key takeaways from today's episode of The Overwhelm Cure: How to reframe difficult summer moments as opportunities to learn and adjust your parenting strategies. Evaluating what's actually fun for ALL your family members. Chances are—simple might be better. How to think intentionally about your guiding principles, values, and goals for your kids' childhoods. Why it's okay to let struggles happen—while it's uncomfortable, this is how kids learn and grow. The importance of taking time to recognize and grieve the shifts in identity that come with kids gaining independence, getting their driver's licenses, and even moving out to go to college. Being okay with the imperfect moments—focus on managing your thoughts and stress response so you can be a good role model for your kids. Most of all, make sure you're taking the time to look after yourself. Take the time to care for your body and mind, and stay connected to what you truly want. Remember, it takes a village to raise kids. We were never meant to parent alone. It's okay to ask for support. Timestamps: 00:00 Welcome to Back-to-School Season 00:56 Summer Parenting Challenges 02:41 Stress Tests and Parenting Insights 05:42 Traveling with Kids: Lessons Learned 07:48 Simplifying Family Vacations 13:02 Reflecting on Parenting through Your Childhood 15:31 Parenting Plans and Values 20:54 Identity Shift as Kids Grow More Independent 24:56 Final Thoughts on Parenting & Invitation to Seek Support Quick Links: Explore working with Kimberly Knull Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram

18 Aug 28min

"Is this as good as it gets?" "Is this really all there is? If you've ever asked yourself these questions, you're not alone. And you might also be focused on productivity and getting things done. We often turn to these unintentional strategies when we get overwhelmed in an effort to make our lives easier. But we end up making things much harder. While our brains try to simplify things, we end up cutting back on the very things that truly nourish us — sleep, fun, and even silliness. The things we often perceive as "nice to haves" or "extras" — but should actually be non-negotiable. We tell ourselves it's temporary and that when we have more time, we'll bring back in the "extras," but these cutbacks can quickly become new, unsustainable habits that neglect sleep, socializing, and fun, leading to burnout. Drawing from my recent Courageous Leaders Mastermind Retreat the other week, I saw how this was showing up in women's lives right now. In this week's episode, I dive into the three main problems contributing to this unsustainable cycle: being overly focused on productivity, ending up tired and grumpy from self-deprivation, and seeing basic self-care as selfish. I also address the lies our brains tell us about needing to control everything and everyone. It's time to realize that you are just as important as everyone else and deserve an extraordinary, fulfilling, and fun-filled life! Here's what you'll learn today: How the attempts to simplify our lives can inadvertently lead to more overwhelm. The reasons why we tend to give up nourishing activities when we're overwhelmed. Why self-care, rest, and connection are essential, not just "nice to haves." How to identify and challenge those tricky self-sacrificing thought patterns. Practical strategies for prioritizing tasks and incorporating joy into your daily life. 3 powerful and practical solutions to help you shift your mindset, make good choices by prioritizing and delegating, dreaming big about what truly makes you happy, and intentionally changing unhelpful thought patterns. Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction: Unintentional Ways We Complicate Our Lives 00:28 The Cycle of Overwhelm 01:59 The Importance of Rest, Connection, and Fun 05:24 The Three Problems Contributing to Overwhelm 10:02 Three Solutions to Take Back Your Time and Joy 15:44 Changing Your Mindset for Better Self-Care 19:12 Conclusion: Taking Control of Your Life Quick Links: Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram

11 Aug 20min

Boost your decision-making skills by practicing them daily. Whether you're on vacation or at work, you've got decisions to make every day. And when we get stuck in a loop, unsure what action to take, we can end up feeling overwhelmed because we're worried about picking the "wrong" choice. But what if there were no "wrong" choices? Did you know that our brains have a limited amount of decision-making capacity each day? Maybe you've noticed how you make better decisions when you're well-rested or right after a healthy meal.  And on the flip side, maybe you make questionable decisions when you're tired, hungry, or stressed. Have you ever tried to focus on a big decision when you're hangry? It's hard!  When we practice decision-making, we improve our skills. The more efficient we are at making decisions, the more quickly we can make good decisions, also leading us to feel calmer in the moment. Summer is winding down, and whether you're heading out to the cabin or vacationing overseas, these are great opportunities to test-drive your decision-making skills. If you struggle with decisions, you'll find today's quick episode super helpful: What you'll learn: Why decision-making skills are KEY for reducing stress and overwhelm. How many decisions you can confidently make in a day depends on your level of "decision fatigue." Practical strategies to help you make fewer decisions each day and conserve your mental energy for the big choices. How timing your decisions at the right time can make every choice easier. The power of habits in eliminating decisions completely. I hope you'll take the strategies I share today to help you become a more effective decision-maker. Timestamps:  00:00 Introduction to Decision Making 01:53 Understanding Decision Fatigue 03:19 Tips for Effective Decision Making 06:49 The Importance of Planning Ahead 12:03 A Real-Life Decision-Making Example on Vacation 20:56 Conclusion and Final Thoughts   Quick Links: Explore working together Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram

4 Aug 22min

How do you handle emergencies? I don't mean the 9-1-1 cases.  This week, I've had several clients share their "emergency situations" that popped up in their lives. This prompted me to reflect on how we perceive and respond to these moments. I've certainly been in emergencies myself, and there are definitely ways we can make things either better or worse. And it's not just this week. For 20 years as a psychologist, I've heard many stories of these non-911 situations described as emergencies.  Perhaps this is how you got your needs met in childhood. But as an adult, constantly labeling things as emergencies can lead others not to take you seriously. When really, you can get help by simply asking for it, expressing that you're overwhelmed or stressed. When our minds perceive something as an emergency, it triggers our stress response, kicking it into high gear and taking our thinking brain offline and pushing us into fight, flight, or freeze mode. This is a basic instinct designed for true dangers, like a bear chasing you.  The problem is that when we react this way to non-emergencies, we can end up making poor choices, leading us to feel even more overwhelmed. While 911 isn't always appropriate, asking for help is. My clients were able to talk through their challenging situations with me, realizing their brains went straight to panic and worst-case scenarios, when really, there wasn't enough information to warrant worrying about those outcomes. We explored various options, developing game plans beyond their initial thoughts. Here's what I cover today: How to differentiate between true and perceived "emergencies." The physiological impact of perceiving everyday situations as an emergency. Why it's important to regulate emotions before taking action in stressful situations. Practical techniques for emotional regulation, such as box breathing. The role of setting boundaries and allowing others to face consequences in non-emergency interpersonal conflicts. The value of asking for help and brainstorming solutions with others. The importance of taking time to assess a situation when no one is in immediate danger. Timestamps: 00:00 Introduction to Emergency Situations 00:44 Defining a Real Emergency 02:05 Perception vs. Reality of Emergencies 04:08 Emotional Reactions and Coping Mechanisms 05:31 Practical Steps to Handling Emergencies 09:20 The Importance of Emotional Regulation 17:05 Real-Life Example: Lost Wallet While Traveling 20:43 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Quick Links: Kimberly Knull Website Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram

28 Juli 22min

Can you relate to this? The panicky sense of overwhelm that comes with deadlines looming or when you're preparing for a trip.  As I get ready for an overseas trip and a workshop, I'm feeling the pressure to get everything done before my calendar closes and I unplug and relax for three weeks.  This inspired me to share my strategies for tackling overwhelm through organization with you today. In this episode, you'll hear why organization truly matters and how it can stop that overwhelm spiral. And it's certainly not about being perfect, but about creating systems that support you through your busy life.  Our brains are great at generating ideas, but they don't always take into account our physical energy or time constraints. Then we end up convincing ourselves we need to do a million things when it's simply impossible.  Here's what you'll learn today: How becoming more organized can cure overwhelm in both the physical and digital spaces Why taming the "perfectionist beast" can save you tons of time and energy How simply identifying the source of overwhelm and naming it can lessen its grip on us  Practical ways to prioritize your to-do list so you can focus on what HAS to be done  My favorite time management technique from Mel Robbins, which works every time especially for the tasks I don't want to do (like bookkeeping) Really, done is better than perfect in most of these situations. This episode delivers a hefty dose of compassion and some practical examples from my life as I hit record for this episode while my lengthy pre-vacation to-do list waited for me. Timestamps:  00:00 Introduction and Personal Story (Preparing for travel and a workshop) 04:28 The Importance of Organization 07:21 Identifying Types of Clutter 10:21 Setting the Stage for Productivity 11:31 Prioritizing Tasks Effectively 14:22 Dealing with Digital Clutter 17:22 Tidying Up with Compassion 21:25 Organizing Your Time 26:04 Celebrating Wins and Self-Compassion 30:57 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Quick Links: Schedule a free 20-minute consultation Connect on LinkedIn Connect on Facebook Connect on Instagram

21 Juli 32min