Ten Years

http://polaroid41.com/ten-years/

Sunday, October 17th, 2021 - 10:26am.

I got my first passport in a rush at age 16. My high school German class was doing an exchange with a high school near Stuttgart. My family had signed up to host students, but I had opted out of the three-week trip. I couldn’t imagine going so far away for so long. At the last minute, one of my classmates dropped out, a spot became available at a reduced rate, and my mom said: “Tina, you’re going!” She’d never been abroad herself and she knew it would be an enriching experience for me. We dashed to the courthouse in Mankato to request a passport, we paid extra to get it fast, and I learned the word “expedited.” It all seemed very exciting and grown up.

That trip to Germany was my very first stamp in my passport, my first transatlantic flight and my first time traveling without my parents. At least I was familiar with flying from various family trips to California, Florida, and the East Coast. Many of my classmates from rural Minnesota had never even been on a plane before. We were all buzzing with excitement, and though the exchange soon became a school tradition, we were the very first ones to go. That was 25 years ago now, but I still have vivid memories. Some are just flashes or sensations that are hard to put into words, but they’ve stuck with me all this time: discovering UHT milk that didn’t have to be refrigerated before opening, hearing Radiohead for the first time on German MTV, the feeling of the car flying at top speed along the autobahn, sleeping under a thick comforter without a flat sheet layered underneath, eating warm soft pretzels from the stand outside the high school, meeting up in the evenings at the ice cream shop, going to my first discotheque. My host family lived in an apartment, which seemed very exotic to me, and it was my first time being welcome into a foreign home, a non-American family. I was struck again and again by how much independence the German high schoolers had, how grown up they seemed. Of course, while they were in Minnesota, they all marveled at the fact that we could drive at age 16, at how big and ‘American’ everything was.

I wonder sometimes at the real significance of that trip. If I hadn’t gone, I wonder if I ever would have done study abroad in college, if I ever would have started my love of affair with Europe and traveling, if I ever would have wound up living in France.

I was under 18 when I got that first passport, so it was only valid for 5 years. I remember going to renew it when I was 21 in Iowa City. I’d been up late the night before, busy falling in love with a new boyfriend. In the photo I look a little sleepy, dazed, love struck. My hair is very long and wavy, I’m wearing a floaty green hippie tank top from the Peaceful Fool and a necklace with a jade stone. I remember thinking: “Where will I go with this passport? I’ll be over 30 when I renew it. What will life be like?”

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The complete 'polaroid' - text, minicast and polaroid photo - available at: http://polaroid41.com/ten-years/