Say This, Not That: Autistic Partner Communication

Say This, Not That: Autistic Partner Communication

Autistic partner communication, neurodiverse relationship conflict, de-escalation. Learn soft startups and simple phrase swaps so your partner can actually hear you—without repeat fights. Clara joins Jodi to unpack why harsh openings trigger fight/flight (and shut down logic), how to use a respectful Pause (often 20–30 minutes), and the scripts that turn interrogation into curiosity: “I’d like to understand…”, “I’m curious about…” Listen in for words you can use tonight!

What You'll Learn

  • Why “Why didn’t you…/Always/Never/You’re wrong” spikes defenses
  • Soft startup scripts that lower cortisol and invite dialogue
  • The Pause: a fast reset when emotions surge
  • Noticing fight/flight (including interoception gaps for autistic partners)
  • How to change what you control—without changing who you are

Try it now — phrase swaps:

  • Instead of “Why didn’t you…?” → “I’d like to understand…”
  • Instead of “You never/always…” → “I notice X. Could we try Y?”
  • Instead of “You’re wrong.” → “I see it differently—here’s my view.”

Key Moments

00:00 Welcome & who this is for

00:30 Soft vs. harsh startups (with Clara)

04:05 Fight/flight: why harsh openings fail

08:59 Phrase swaps that invite connection

12:05 The Pause (20–30 min reset)

19:22 Change what you can control

33:34 Soft startup scripts that work

Resources Mentioned

Det här avsnittet är hämtat från ett öppet RSS-flöde och publiceras inte av Podme. Det kan innehålla reklam.

Avsnitt(117)

Not a Deal Breaker: Hope for Neurodiverse Couples

Not a Deal Breaker: Hope for Neurodiverse Couples

What happens when two people in a neurodiverse relationship remember the same conversation completely differently? This week, Mona and I explore the memory and communication disconnects that can put n...

15 Sep 22min

Why Your ADHD Brain Forgets Everything (Except What It Loves): S6E8

Why Your ADHD Brain Forgets Everything (Except What It Loves): S6E8

This week we're getting really personal. We're opening up about our own ADHD brains — the things we've struggled with, the stuff that drove our partners crazy, and the moments that only made sense onc...

2 Sep 24min

"There Might Be Zero Sex" — The Truth About Intimacy in Neurodiverse Relationships S6E7

"There Might Be Zero Sex" — The Truth About Intimacy in Neurodiverse Relationships S6E7

If you're in a neurodiverse relationship — whether you're ADHD, autistic, or both — intimacy can be one of the most complicated things to navigate. In this episode, Mona Kay & I get real about love vs...

18 Aug 16min

Is this Sabotaging Intimacy in Your Neurodiverse Relationship? S6E6 with Jodi Carlton & Mona Kay

Is this Sabotaging Intimacy in Your Neurodiverse Relationship? S6E6 with Jodi Carlton & Mona Kay

If you're in a neurodiverse relationship — whether you're ADHD, autistic, or both — intimacy can be one of the most complicated things to navigate. In this episode, Mona Kay & I get real about routine...

4 Aug 19min

Neurodivergent Dating After Divorce: Sensory Differences, Sex & Red Flags S6|E5

Neurodivergent Dating After Divorce: Sensory Differences, Sex & Red Flags S6|E5

Are you neurodivergent and trying to navigate dating? Especially after a divorce? We can relate! In this episode, my co-host, Mona Kay, and I get real about our personal dating experiences after divor...

21 Juli 32min

Is It Autism or Incompatibility? What Neurodiverse Couples Need to Know

Is It Autism or Incompatibility? What Neurodiverse Couples Need to Know

Is your relationship struggling because of neurodivergence — or because you're just not compatible? In this episode of Navigating Neurodiverse Love and Life, Jodi Carlton and Mona Kay get honest about...

7 Juli 17min

The Sound of My Voice Was Hurting Him: Compatibility in Neurodiverse Relationships

The Sound of My Voice Was Hurting Him: Compatibility in Neurodiverse Relationships

Have you ever felt like your emotions were wrong — or like your partner simply couldn't understand why you were upset? You might be experiencing the impact of alexithymia in your neurodiverse relation...

23 Juni 22min

Alexithymia in Neurodiverse Relationships: My Emotions Didn't Make Sense to Him

Alexithymia in Neurodiverse Relationships: My Emotions Didn't Make Sense to Him

Have you ever felt like your emotions were wrong — or that your partner just couldn't connect with what you were feeling? In this episode, Mona Kay and Jodi Carlton share candidly about their decades-...

10 Juni 22min

Populärt inom Utbildning

historiepodden-se
det-skaver
rss-bara-en-till-om-beroende-medberoende
nu-blir-det-historia
harrisons-dramatiska-historia
not-fanny-anymore
johannes-hansen-podcast
allt-du-velat-veta
rss-viktmedicinpodden
roda-vita-rosen
sa-in-i-sjalen
rikatillsammans-om-privatekonomi-rikedom-i-livet
rss-foraldramotet-bring-lagercrantz
rss-max-tant-med-max-villman
i-vantan-pa-katastrofen
rss-traningsklubben
sektledare
rss-basta-livet
rss-autismandan
rss-okrystat