Unpacking the Hidden Layers of Vulnerable and Grandiose Narcissism: Step 2 of Relationship Growth

In this episode, we examine the complexities of pathological narcissism, focusing on how the grandiose self-structure ("big ego") shapes relationships and hinders authentic connection. Using the case of a man named Barry, we explore how grandiosity serves as a defense against low self-esteem and painful emotions, leading to the creation of a false self. We discuss how understanding these dynamics is crucial for fostering deeper, more genuine relationships. This episode also highlights key the...

30 Okt 202426min

In this episode, we continue our discussion on "narcissistic psychic retreats," focusing on how individuals with narcissistic tendencies often escape into a fantasy world where their needs are instantly met. We explore how feelings of anger and judgment can cover up deeper vulnerabilities and experiences of loss. By examining a real-life example, we illustrate how these emotional defenses operate and their impact on relationships. The conversation emphasizes the importance of staying connecte...

23 Okt 202429min

In this episode, we dive into the concept of the “depressive position” and its relationship to development. We talk about the challenge of accepting the independence and separateness of others, and the struggle to let go of the need to control them. We explore how the depressive position involves facing the tough realities of loss, separation, and limitations — and why this process is crucial for our emotional growth. We also introduce the idea of “pathological organizations”, those defense m...

16 Okt 202426min

In this second part of our live recording with Bre Wolta, a Certified Relationship Clarity Coach, we dive deep into the complexities of trauma bonding and the emotional fog that often clouds toxic relationships. Together, we explore practical techniques for healing and breaking free from these cycles – which we can also call the THE FANTASY TRAP. Bre shares the importance of gathering data about your current reality and the role of body awareness in recognizing unhealthy patterns. We focus on...

9 Okt 202433min

In this episode, I present Part 2 of a live interview with Lisa Taylor-Austin, where we discuss the complexities of narcissism and its treatment. Lisa and I delve into the psychological approaches for addressing Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), agreeing that while building safety and trust is an important and necessary step, it is not enough on its own. I review additional therapeutic techniques that I have found helpful in terms of understanding deep inner struggles caused by project...

2 Okt 202424min

In this episode, I present Part 2 of a live interview with Lisa Taylor-Austin, where we discuss the intricacies of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). Lisa and I continue our discussion on psychological mechanisms like projection, introjection, and splitting, which shape the disorder and impact relationships. I emphasize the need to understand the internal dynamics of NPD, particularly how narcissistic individuals project their negative self-image onto others, leading to distorted percep...

25 Sep 202428min

In this episode, we explore the connection between shame and narcissism. We look at how shame is a powerful and often misunderstood emotion that is central to Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Shame can drive individuals with NPD to either retreat into themselves or lash out to protect their fragile self-esteem. I discuss how shame impacts behavior and how it can be linked to early childhood experiences. We also explore how shame manifests in adult relationships. Overall, this ep...

18 Sep 202428min

In this episode, we explore the complex emotion of shame and its deep connection to Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). We'll uncover how shame influences behavior, leading individuals to either retreat into isolation or lash out to protect their fragile self-esteem. Through relatable examples, we delve into the origins of shame in early childhood and its lasting impact on adult relationships. You'll learn to recognize the signs of shame in narcissistic behavior and gain insights into th...

11 Sep 20248min