EP#105: TikTok’s The Bratty Cat Shares His Story on Polyamory & Kink

I had the pleasure of hosting Kevin, also known as The Bratty Cat on TikTok. Kevin is not just an amazing human and one of my favorite TikTokers, but also a member of the kink community, non-monogamous, has 4 partners, and 4 cats.

We covered so many subjects, I’m going to add them below along with clickable timestamps:

The journey in the kink and polyamorous communities [00:01:16] Kevin discusses his experiences in the kink and polyamorous communities, including his transition from swinging to polyamory and his interest in BDSM.

The concept of a masochistic bratty submissive [00:04:35] Kevin explains the three components of being a masochistic bratty submissive: masochism, brattiness, and submission.

Understanding the dynamics of being a brat and a brat tamer [00:06:27] Kevin delves into the unique relationship between a brat and a brat tamer, discussing how brats challenge authority and how brat tamers handle and guide them.

Negotiating Boundaries and Consent [00:09:10] Discussion about negotiating boundaries and consent in the kink community, including the inevitability of crossing lines and the need for communication and resolution.

Types of Punishments in BDSM [00:10:11] Explanation of the two types of punishments in BDSM, including punishment for wrongdoing and punishment as a means to control bratty behavior.

Managing Multiple Partners in Polyamory [00:12:34] Insight into the speaker's experience of managing multiple partners, including the unique circumstances of each relationship and the challenges of balancing time and communication.

Reluctance to Ask for Sex [00:17:40] Kevin discusses his struggle with asking for sex and the fear of coming off as sexually aggressive.

Difficulty Vocalizing Desires [00:19:27] Kevin talks about the challenge of vocalizing his desires as a submissive and the importance of explicit communication.

Repression and Inability to Communicate Desires [00:22:04] The host shares her observations of women's repression and inability to vocalize desires during sexual encounters, emphasizing the need for empowerment and communication.

Hierarchy: Definition and Misconceptions [00:27:04] Kevin explains his definition of hierarchy and why he believes everyone should work towards being non-hierarchical.

Descriptive Hierarchy vs. Actual Hierarchy [00:27:44] Kevin clarifies the difference between descriptive hierarchy (shared finances, living arrangements, etc.) and actual hierarchy (power dynamics and decision-making).

Non-Hierarchical Relationships and Embracing Change [00:29:43] Kevin discusses non-hierarchical relationships, where feelings and emotions are allowed to shift and change, and opens up about the possibility of drifting apart from his long-term partner.

The journey of finding new partners [00:36:24] The host discusses how letting go of a previous partner led to finding a new partner and the positive experiences that came with it.

Polyamory and multiple partners [00:37:58] The guest explains the concept of polyamory and talks about his partner's other partners, including a nearby partner and a long-distance partner.

Jealousy and the fluidity of relationships [00:39:15] The guest discusses his experience with jealousy in relationships and emphasizes the importance of recognizing that love doesn't last forever and that partners are autonomous.

STI Testing Best Practices [00:46:35] The guest discusses general best practices for STI testing, including how often to get tested and what factors to consider.

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