TU161: Managing Unconscious Defense & Fear with Ann Kelley PhD and Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP

TU161: Managing Unconscious Defense & Fear with Ann Kelley PhD and Sue Marriott LCSW, CGP

Season 6 Premiere! Move from defense and fear

It’s been a ride, but hosts Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley are back in full force and ready for this exciting season. In this episode, we catch up with you and discuss the depths of the defensive process and how to resource ourselves to put down the walls we don’t even mean to put up. Cis-women are socialized to subsume themselves to others’ needs and Ann and Sue are no exception. They are working on holding their own voice and letting their little light shine freely. Watch this 3 min clip to see what we mean and to get into the spirit yourself! 🙂

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Acfc2gUErI

Content-wise, they discuss the difference between cognitive understanding of modern attachment and regulation, and the bottom-up experience of it. We distort information coming in – either by not registering interpersonal information (dismissing/blue side of the spectrum) or by over-interpreting the importance of an exchange (up-regulating with fear). This is an unconscious process that to undo we have to have the courage and the resources to feel the feelings that cause us to defend. They walk through it with you – they don’t just tell you what to do – so join us in understanding our own defensive process.

Check out our recent replays for a refresher on each of the attachment styles:

TU158

TU159

TU160

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TU109: THIS is Resilience in Action With Guest Alphanso Appleton

TU109: THIS is Resilience in Action With Guest Alphanso Appleton

Resilience in real-life from a non-Western perspective. (Cover photo, Appleton took responsibility for feeding kids in his village by diving and spearing food from the sea.) “And if there’s any other ...

22 Nov 201934min

TU108: Judgment and Self-Criticism Unchecked – a Great Interpersonal Defense

TU108: Judgment and Self-Criticism Unchecked – a Great Interpersonal Defense

Judgment says more about the judg-er than the judg-ee. It’s not Judgement – Bad. It’s Judgment-Interesting. Everybody judges and in truth, we unconsciously evaluate good/bad all the time – both positi...

15 Nov 201921min

TU107: What is Somatic Experiencing With Guest Abi Blakeslee

TU107: What is Somatic Experiencing With Guest Abi Blakeslee

Trauma is not a life sentence. We are rapidly learning what works to reverse the effects of stored injuries and today we will explore one treatment version of that, called Somatic Experiencing.  First...

30 Okt 20191h

TU106: What Actually Heals in Therapy with Psychoanalyst Nancy McWilliams

TU106: What Actually Heals in Therapy with Psychoanalyst Nancy McWilliams

Learn what actually works in therapy. It’s hard to verbalize the problem with “evidence-based” models of care, but renowned psychoanalyst and psychologist Nancy McWilliams does just that. She further ...

18 Okt 201945min

TU105: Narcissism – What is Going on Under the Defense with Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley

TU105: Narcissism – What is Going on Under the Defense with Sue Marriott and Ann Kelley

Hey everybody, we are BACK and ready to take off on Season 4!!! Wahoo! Narcissism – This time we focus on how it’s created and what is going on behind the narcissists defenses. Later we will address M...

3 Okt 201944min

TU104: Attachment Science & the Single World With Becki Mendivil (Replay)

TU104: Attachment Science & the Single World With Becki Mendivil (Replay)

Are you sick of hearing about relationships but interested in attachment? (Or want to deepen your understanding of real world application of the relational sciences while you have a good laugh??!) All...

25 Sep 201954min

TU103: Curiosity – One of the Most Powerful Tools For Connection (Replay)

TU103: Curiosity – One of the Most Powerful Tools For Connection (Replay)

Have you ever just sat back and observed a small child as they learn something new? There is this profound sense of awe and wonder with each new discovery they make. Kids are naturally curious. As adu...

15 Aug 201940min

TU102: Finding Neurological Safety through Relationships, with Guest Bonnie Badenoch (Replay)

TU102: Finding Neurological Safety through Relationships, with Guest Bonnie Badenoch (Replay)

The Power of Co-Regulation Explore the myth of self-regulation, the natural neurobiology of co-regulation and it’s capacity to engage safety and heal trauma. Learn about using interpersonal neurobiolo...

1 Aug 201950min

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