Creating Digital Safe Spaces :: Chris McKenna [Ep 360]

Between the pandemic and uncertainty of this last year and all the pressure of the upcoming holiday season, there is a lot of potential for conflict. My friend and mentor Lynn Hoffman is here with some timely advice on how to engage in this inevitable conflict in a healthy way. We talk about doing some inner work when you feel hurt by someone or see conflict on the horizon and Lynn shares some stories of how examining her own heart and feelings have made all the difference in her own relationships.  “It’s about recognizing that I'm a limited human being and I have a limited amount of emotional capacity. It is not infinite. So it's my responsibility. Not somebody else's to pull back and spend some time with the Lord.To do some inner work to really figure out, okay, what's going on with me and what do I need at this moment?” Whether you find yourself in new, hard places of stress and conflict or fear the constant repeating of old woundings when interacting with family, this episode is for you.  Questions to ask yourself in conflict: What happened? What do I think about this situation and person? What did I want (expect)? How do I feel (now and any related past feelings) Links Mentioned:   EP 129: Recovery For Life :: Lynn Hoffman Lynn’s Book: Steps Into God's Grace: Spiritual Formation through God’s Word and the 12 Steps of Recovery EP 250: Setting Healthy Boundaries with Family :: Dr. John Townsend Featured Sponsors:  Hello Bello -- Get 25% off your diaper bundle order. Plus get 15% off any add-ons. Go to hellobello.com/DMA Skylight Frames-- Get $10 off your purchase of a Skylight Frame. Go to: Skylight.com and enter the code DMA Ancestry -- Get an Ancestry gift today with their special Holiday pricing. Ancestry.com/DMA

30 Nov 202049min

You know who is coming to town. The big man in the red suit is everywhere this time of year and each of us grew up with different traditions on how to engage with and celebrate Santa.  My assistant Sarah-Jane and I chat about what it was like for each of us growing up with and without Santa and how we acknowledge the jolly yuletide figure with our kids without taking the focus off Jesus. Sarah-Jane shares how her family adopted a separate holiday in December, Saint Nicholas Day, and I talk about playing the “Santa Game” with my kids. Wherever you fall on the “Santa spectrum,” we hope this conversation gives you grace to celebrate Christmas with your family with or without Santa being a major part (and give that same grace to others).   “Isn't it so great that God doesn't work the same way as Santa? It’s because we're so naughty that we got the gift of Jesus. It's the opposite. So I would, as a teaching moment to reemphasize the glorious grace of Jesus. Instead of thinking, I can't do Santa because it takes away from the grace of Jesus, the good news is we have a different option.” Links Mentioned:   Saint Nicholas Center Veggietales- Saint Nicolas: A Story of Joyful Giving Buck Denver: Who is Santa Claus? Light ‘Em Up  The Star from Afar The Shepherd on the Search Using Santa to Teach Grace [BLOG POST]  Featured Sponsors:  Skylight Frames --get $10 off your purchase of a Skylight Frame when you go to SkylightFrame.com and enter code DMA. Story Worth -- Give your loved ones the gift of spending time together, wherever you live, with StoryWorth. Get started right away with no shipping required by going to StoryWorth.com/dma. You’ll get $10 off your first purchase! PrepDish -- Just go to Prepdish.com/shop and enter code DMA5020 at checkout to get HALF OFF meal plans (deal only lasts from Black Friday to Cyber Monday).

23 Nov 202037min

As a mom of three small children, author and podcaster Tsh Oxenreider found Christmas a bit overwhelming and as Charlie Brown would say, “too commercial.” Year after year she found herself dreading the season and looking for simple ways to refocus the holiday on the things that mattered most.  After living overseas for a year with her family and switching to a more liturgical church, Tsh found the centuries old observance of Advent to be the perfect way to slow down the crazy season of Christmas. She joins me to introduce Advent if you are new to it and to talk about the beautiful new Advent guide she created. “This is for us, this is to reset our hearts and our focus to that which is the true reason we celebrate Christmas. So the thing I love about celebrating Advent in our culture is that it feels pretty counter-cultural in a world that both is focused on the gifts and is focused on the consumption parts of Christmas.” If you’ve ever wanted to know more about the liturgical practice of Advent, this is the show for you! Tsh shares a lot of practicals and perspectives about why celebrating this separate season can help us prepare for both the celebration of Jesus’ birth and the eventual time when Christ will, one day, make all things new. Connect with Tsh:  Website:  https://tshoxenreider.com  Instagram:  @tshoxenreider Twitter: https://twitter.com/tsh  Links Mentioned:   BOOK: Shadow and Light: A Journey into Advent Biblical Feasts with Amber Lee  Advent resources from Tsh Other books from Tsh Featured Sponsor:  BetterHelp -- Get 10% off your first month of online professional counseling betterhelp.com/DMA Acorn TV -- Try FREE for 30 days using code: DMA https://acorn.tv/

16 Nov 202047min

Do  you  ever  find  yourself  replaying  and  reliving  the details of the deepest hurt in your life? My guest today has endured a devastating, public heartbreak – and she has wrestled with the lingering,unresolved pain which followed. Author and speaker Lysa TerKeurst joins me to share part of her  journey of  learning to forgive what you can’t forget. “I don't want to make this sound more clean and pretty than it actually was. It was hard. It was horrific. It was terrible. And walking out something as devastating as an affair in a marriage created tremendous burden and tremendous hardship. But I will say that one commitment that I made that was really important was that I can feel hurt, but I don't have to choose to live hurt. Or perpetuate that hurt into other people.” Lysa shares vulnerably and offers advice for anyone who feels stuck in a cycle of unresolved pain. We talk about the huge help a Christian counselor has been both for Lysa and her children throughout this process and how she delved into what the Bible really says about forgiveness. “The Bible never says that people have to forgive and forget. It actually says quite the opposite. If we can be healed of it, it is actually beneficial not to forget because it becomes a testimony that can be used in powerful ways. And that's part of the good that God can bring in our story. I think how we know that we are experiencing healing is the way that we tell the stories of our lives.” Connect with Lysa:  Website:  https://lysaterkeurst.com  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/OfficialLysa  Instagram:  @lysaterkeurst  Links Mentioned:   EP 45: 5 Schedule Sappers and How to Stop Them :: Lysa TerKeurst EP 131: Uninvited :: Lysa TerKeurst, Kay Wyma & Courtney DeFeo  BOOK: Forgiving What You Can't Forget  Featured Sponsors:  HelloBello --Get a diaper bundle 25% off, free shipping and 15% off add-ons hellobello.com/DMA BetterHelp --Get 10% off your first month of online counseling betterhelp.com/DMA Ancestry --check out the holiday deals on Ancestry DNA products ancestry.com/DMA

9 Nov 202053min

As a long time believer, my friend Molly just couldn’t see much value in prayer. With her always on-the-go personality and her full life raising three boys with her husband, taking the time to sit in silence and pray seemed unappealing. Besides, doesn’t God already know what’s going to happen?  But, something shifted in a big way for Molly as she started to learn more about the Holy Spirit and met a friend who prayed with power and conviction and talked about really having a relationship with God.  “I would say that my prayers were very polite and just formal at best and just really few and far between. So I really did just kind of blow the lid off of the box that I had him in regarding prayer and just gave me this fresh perspective of going to him and communing with him…  I started to see it as this right and this privilege to pray as God's daughter.” Since then, Molly has seen God move in powerful ways in her life through the humble act of prayer. She shares just a few of the stories of how God has used her — just a “normal mom” — to minister to others around her, even door-to-door salespersons!  If you are feeling discouraged or need a boost in your prayer life, this is the episode for you! I pray Molly’s story gets you excited about talking with God in a new way.  Links Mentioned:  In Light of Eternity :: Jen Clouse [Ep 100] More on Prayer:   Listening to the Lord :: Kelsey Phillips [Ep 279] Praying the Scriptures :: Jodie Berndt [Ep 194] God-centered Prayer (part one)  |  DMA blog post God-centered Prayer (part two)  | DMA blog poast God-centered Prayer (part three)  |  DMA blog post Featured Sponsors:  Prep Dish -- Try two weeks of free meal plans prepdish.com/DMA Better Help -- Get 10% off your first month of counseling betterhelp.com/DMA

2 Nov 202043min

With the heaviness of 2020 weighing on so many moms, I thought this week we should share a few laughs. My assistant Sarah-Jane Menefee joins me to share some funny mom stories we’ve experienced and stories that listeners submitted.  We’ve got everything from simple misunderstandings to funny church stories to the ever-popular and unavoidable poop stories. I also share a tip on one way to remember the fun stories for each of your kids that doesn’t involve trying to write things down in a book. 😉 Sometimes you’ve got to laugh to keep from crying and that’s what this week is all about. Featured Sponsors: ModCloth -- To get 20% off your purchase of $75 or more INCLUDING sale items, go to ModCloth.com and enter code dma at checkout. Promo code can not be combined with other offers. Hello Bello -- if you go to hellobello.com/DMA, you’ll get 25% OFF your diaper bundle order! Plus, get 15% off any add ons like vitamins or wipes. And Free Shipping!  Sun Basket -- Sun Basket is offering $35 off your order when you go right now to SunBasket.com/DMA and enter promo code dma at checkout.

26 Okt 202042min

Several listeners recommended Dr. Rosaria Butterfield as a guest on our recent survey. I’m so glad you did! Dr. Butterfield shares about her former life as a lesbian and professor of queer theory. In a quest to understand why Christians hated her, a neighbor introduced her Christ. Now she is an author, speaker, pastor’s wife,  adoptive mother of four and gospel advocate to her neighbors.  She is passionate about helping Christians lovingly look past labels of sexual identity and share the gospel effectively. “So if you know that you have neighbors who identify as lesbian. Don't avoid them. That's not what Christian neighbors do. You know? I think we really do need to see these things head on. Don't be afraid to listen to what people's concerns are and then speak a word in season. I would say too that Christians don't throw people away. We shouldn't be known for people who throw people away because they're inconvenient.” We talk about a lot of subjects that can be difficult for us as moms to discuss, but also about how important it is that we have conversations with our kids about sexual identity, the Gospel and who God made them to be.  “The first thing is as Christian parents, if you don't talk to your children about sexuality, Someone else will. So while we want to maintain modesty and care and age appropriateness, we absolutely do not want to shirk this responsibility. We need to foreground the beauty and the majesty and the calling of what it means to be a man and what it means to be a woman.” Connect with Dr. Butterfield:  Website:  https://rosariabutterfield.com  Links Mentioned:   Irreversible Damage: The Transgender Craze Seducing Our Daughters** The Birds and Bees Curriculum  When to Have “the Talk” :: Mary Flo Ridley [Encore Podcast] Birds and Bees (Continuing the Conversation) :: Mary Flo Ridley and Megan Michelson [Ep 153] Preparing Now for Future Puberty and Masturbation Questions :: Mary Flo and Megan [Ep 243]  Dr. Butterfield’s Books: The Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert** Openness Unhindered: Further Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert on Sexual Identity and Union with Christ ** The Gospel Comes with a House Key** Featured Sponsors:  AncestryHealth -- get a kit to determine your genetic risk at ancestry.com/DMA Sun Basket -- get $35 off your first order at sunbasket.com/DMA use promo code DMA

19 Okt 202051min

Whether we like it or not we have habits that define our lives. We have habits that determine when we wake up, how we spend our time and where we focus our energy. Joining me today to talk about how to establish routines and healthy habits is my good friend Kat Lee.  As the founder of Hello Mornings, Kat is all about helping people have a life-giving morning routine every day in as little as three minutes, but beyond just mornings, Kat has a wealth of knowledge to share on habit formation and a lot of encouragement that we can do them. “Whatever it is that you're wanting to change or improve--whether it's your morning routine, your parenting, your marriage--whatever it might be, if you believe that it's possible with God and you have a plan and you're committed to it, then you can only progress.” We talk about the idea of deconstructing habits we want to break to find solutions. Decision design and how our lives make habits easier or harder and we even get into a little neuroscience.  But ultimately, Kat wants to remind me and you that God is for us and wants our time and attention. “It's not just about the morning routine or checking anything off, but it's about tapping into the one thing that's going to help you the most each day. And I hope that if you walk away from anything from this episode, it's just that God is with you and that He is for you.” Connect with Kat:  Website: hellomornings.org  Facebook: facebook.com/hellomorningsofficial  Instagram: @hellokatlee    Links Mentioned:   The 3-Minute Morning Hello Mornings book Kat’s podcast: Hello Mornings “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.” Psalm 143:8 Featured Sponsor:  Thrive Market -- get a free gift of up to $24 when you sign for a Thrive Market Membership. go to thrivemarket.com/DMA

12 Okt 202049min