EP10 - What ruler do you measure yourself against?

Part (machine) transcription...

Today’s question or today’s diary question is what rulers do I measure myself against.The word ruler can have two meanings it could mean the king - what ruler do I measure myself against? What aspirational person do a measure myself again but when I first thought about this I thought of it in terms of a king or a master or secondly a ruler can be something to measure against.

On first reflection I took this to be a measurement thing, so what sort of measuring stick do I use my own life as a measuring stick I incorrectly measured myself against business success wealth and success of my kids also if my kids are successful unsuccessful now despite whatever we try to do and say if we look at that well if I look at this honestly I do Look at my kids success as being something that used to measure my own success as a father and is as a person and I know that’s wrong but deep deep down and I’m sure there are more of you out there that you think you know what deep down there is this some modicum of truth about that now obviously there’s business success as well....

I measure myself against myself now I’m going to twist it if I looked at the word ruler to mean master or someone superior to me in in some aspect of life then it could also be quite applicable to look at it that way now I’m not saying that I Measure my life against some person who of which I only see a snippet of their life but there might be actions there might be behaviours that there are some people that are doing e.g. mentors that for that particular instance can be something to aspire to so when I see a politician a skilled politician staying calm under a barrage of questions and in the middle of some sort of a scandal I had made up behaviour that their ability to stay calm under those circumstances to me is is remarkable and that is something I do aspire to I don’t aspire to be that person because I’m sure they’ve got their own dark spaces and I don’t know anything about their lives but I can aspire to certain behaviours that are an indicator of a higher level that I can attain myself in my life so it’s not so not to be confused It’s not about the person I don’t want to be like a Obama but I do want to be as calm as him under pressure or to be able to speak like him regardless of political persuasion.

I measure myself against imagine myself against myself and whether I’m doing the best I can do because I know that will get me to tranquility but I’m also measuring myself against other people whose specific behaviours are things that I can strive for and learn from Don’t confuse any of that with now that does sound a bit external but don’t confuse any of that with me measuring myself against other externalities like money and fame and fortune whatever it is however an eye that should not be the thing but the thing that trip to stop is it that’s the default position and that’s where Stokes got a recognise the thought process understand it and stop it and this Is a big part of what Stacys move but is about if it’s something comes out in the shadows you get immediately startled but then you processing your brain to say okay that’s not dangerous move on it’s the same as a lot of our emotions like last and anger they all things that pop up and we know they’re going to pop up recognise them and move on and let them go and it’s the same with these aspirational thoughts of all if I just get this deal if I get this car or look at the Joneses

From the blog article here.