Who Deserves Your Love? KC Davis on Boundaries, Healing, and Letting Go

Description:

KC Davis is a licensed professional counselor, an author, a speaker, and, frankly, one of the most compassionate, funny, down-to-earth voices out there. During the pandemic, she created an amazing platform called Struggle Care where she has been teaching us how to care for ourselves (and our homes) without stigma or shame. Like—if the laundry’s piled up or the dishes aren’t done, it doesn’t mean you’re lazy or broken. It just means you’re living life. It’s a gracious approach to self-care that we wildly embrace.

KC’s first book, How to Keep House While Drowning, was a total game-changer for so many women who’ve felt overwhelmed by the everyday—and now she’s back with a brand new book called Who Deserves Your Love, helping us figure out which relationships we want to invest in, which ones need boundaries, and maybe even which ones we need to step away from.

This conversation goes to some deep places. We talk about:

• What mistreatment looks like in relationships, as opposed to abuse

• The stories that we tell ourselves about another person’s behavior when we get caught up in the vulnerability cycle

• What it means to be morally neutral

• How to use a relationship decision tree to evaluate and make decisions about a relationship

• And the sticky secret to enforcing boundaries

With accessibility, humorous relatability, and vulnerability, KC is here to help us navigate the messy, complicated work of loving people and loving ourselves.

Thought-provoking Quotes:

• “Sometimes my publishers will give me some advice like, ‘Let’s project that you’re a credible expert’, meanwhile I’m shooting TikToks from the toilet.” – KC Davis

• “Despite being a therapist, I did not realize that I had severe postpartum depression because I didn't feel sad.” KC Davis

• “Messiness is not a moral failing. Either your messiness is just a part of your personality and it's pretty functional for you and you don't need to change anything and accept yourself or maybe it's because you're having a hard time.” – KC Davis

• “No one has ever shamed themselves into better mental health.” – KC Davis

• “Self-care is not the thing you do to make yourself not struggle. It is learning how to take care of yourself while you struggle.” – KC Davis

Resources Mentioned in This Episode:

• Who Deserves Your Love: How to Create Boundaries to Start, Strengthen, or End Any Relationship by KC Davis - https://amzn.to/3GVFdfh

• How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing by KC Davis - https://amzn.to/43dAn4n

• KC Davis Resources - https://www.strugglecare.com/resources

• KC Davis TED Talk - How To Do Laundry When You’re Depressed - https://www.ted.com/talks/kc_davis_how_to_do_laundry_when_you_re_depressed_apr_2022

• Thomas–Kilmann Conflict Styles - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas%E2%80%93Kilmann_Conflict_Mode_Instrument

• Struggle Care - https://www.strugglecare.com/

Guest’s Links:

Website - https://www.strugglecare.com/