How Do You Cope?7 Juli 2025

David Challen: ‘My mum killed my dad but I fought to get her free’

How do you reconcile your mother killing her abuser, when her abuser was your father?

John speaks to domestic abuse campaigner and author David Challen. He shares his experiences of fighting to get his mother freed from prison after she killed his father.

David was just 23 when he found out his mother Sally was close to ending her own life after the incident. She was subsequently sentenced to life in prison. But David felt the need to speak out and uncover his parents’ relationship for what it was; one of serial abuse and coercive control.

David talks about the challenges of reassessing his childhood, his fight to release his mother from prison, and why more men should speak up about violence against women.

Helpful Links:

https://www.standingtogether.org.uk/

https://www.womensaid.org.uk/

If you need help, or just to speak to someone, you can call the National Domestic Abuse Helpline – 0808 2000 247.

David’s new book ‘The Unthinkable: A Story of Control, Violence and My Mother’, is out now.

On Thursday in our bonus episode The Gratitude List, David shares the 5 things that he is currently grateful for.

You can send in your thoughts and reflections to hello@howdoyoucopepod.com or via howdoyoucopepod.com

Watch and subscribe on YouTube @howdoyoucopepod

Follow the show on Instagram, TikTok and Facebook @howdoyoucopepod

If you need support, you can find advice and someone to talk to by visiting www.samaritans.org, emailing jo@samaritans.org or calling 116 123.

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