‘Desire Is Never the Mistake’
Modern Love16 Dec 2020

‘Desire Is Never the Mistake’

This holiday season, it’s OK to want more. Paula grew up in foster care, and year after year she would find herself “clobbered by desire” when the holidays rolled around. She longed for a mother and father to rescue her and “make everything better”; she wished for the hip-huggers and games she saw on TV.

When she was 21, she met a man named Jeff who ruptured this annual cycle of desire. He became the inspiration for a hard-earned Christmas lesson.

Featured stories:

  • “The Holiday of My Dreams Was Just That,” by Paula McLain
  • “A Sweet Reminder,” by Meg Christman


Paula's story was recorded by Audm. To hear more audio stories from publishers like The New York Times, download Audm for iPhone or Android.

You can find more information on today's episode here.

Subscribe today at nytimes.com/podcasts or on Apple Podcasts and Spotify. You can also subscribe via your favorite podcast app here https://www.nytimes.com/activate-access/audio?source=podcatcher. For more podcasts and narrated articles, download The New York Times app at nytimes.com/app.


Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Avsnitt(434)

A Mother’s Wild, Extravagant Love

A Mother’s Wild, Extravagant Love

Genevieve Kingston has carried a cardboard box with her throughout her life, filled with gifts for major milestones — childhood birthdays, her first period, graduation.The gifts are from her mother, w...

16 Mars 202220min

Beyond Girlfriend-Boyfriend

Beyond Girlfriend-Boyfriend

Three months into the pandemic, Haili Blassingame was crafting an email to her boyfriend of five years, Malcolm, with the subject line “My Terms.” She wanted to break up. Haili had met Malcolm in coll...

9 Mars 202216min

When You Think You Know Your Parents

When You Think You Know Your Parents

Ariel Sabar was visiting his parents in his childhood home in California, when he awoke one morning to high-pitched giggles coming from his parents’ room. He opened the door to a Norman Rockwell-type ...

2 Mars 202220min

Married to a Deal Breaker

Married to a Deal Breaker

What are your dating non-negotiables? For Hyla Sabesin Finn, it was smoking — or so she thought. Hyla met Larry in college. She was 17; he was a 21-year-old law student, puffing away outside the libra...

23 Feb 202220min

The ‘Ham Sandwich’ Effect

The ‘Ham Sandwich’ Effect

Before Andrew Limbong went off to college, his mother cautioned him about the dire consequences he would face if he hugged a girl. Andrew grew up in a strict Christian household, and his parents are I...

16 Feb 202219min

First Love Mixtape

First Love Mixtape

We’re back for a whole new season of stories. In today’s premiere, we introduce our new host, Anna Martin, who has a question for listeners: What’s the one song that taught you about love when you wer...

9 Feb 202225min

Loving Across Borders

Loving Across Borders

At age 11, Julissa Arce came to the United States from Mexico on a visa that expired three years later. For more than a decade, she lived as an undocumented immigrant, fearful of revealing her secret ...

21 Juli 202120min

The Upside of Our Parents' Divorce

The Upside of Our Parents' Divorce

What’s the secret to sibling success? Apparently, an ugly divorce. At least, that’s how it went down for Ellen Umansky and her two brothers. Ellen’s parents separated when she was 9. “They loved us de...

14 Juli 202120min

Populärt inom Samhälle & Kultur

podme-dokumentar
aftonbladet-krim
p3-dokumentar
gynning-berg
svenska-fall
mardromsgasten
en-mork-historia
creepypodden-med-jack-werner
skaringer-nessvold
killradet
rss-expressen-dok
hor-har
rattsfallen
flashback-forever
kod-katastrof
rss-sanning-konsekvens
rss-mer-an-bara-morsa
historiska-brott
vad-blir-det-for-mord
rss-brottsutredarna