Breaking Generational Patterns in Relationships, with Leanna Hunt

Saying 'I need help with the dishes' to your spouse is far better than saying 'you are so lazy.' Asking 'why are you always on your phone at dinner?' is not as helpful as expressing that you miss the connection that being with your partner brings when they don't bring their phone to the dinner table.Today, Robert and Sharla are sharing a three-step formula for reducing marital conflict by giving those conversations that we often end up having a more gentle start. How to have constructive conflict is the key to being in a committed relationship because, after all, being 'all in' means saying 'I love you too much to keep this problem hidden.'Learn about the first of eight predictors for divorce, the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, the three-step formula to reframing conflict, and how to deal with one (hypothetically) difficult mother-in-law coming over for dinner. This episode of Master Your Marriage teaches us how to express how we feel, about what, and state what we need, in a positive form. Asking your partner to take positive action regarding your concern is a way to be heard, and one of the first steps toward building a strong, lasting relationship. "The difference between a complaint and criticism is this: complaints are focused on the issue, but criticisms are focused on the person and their character. ~ Robert SnowIn This Episode:- What are the 8 predictors for divorce? Observing the conflict conversation- The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling- How we criticize our partner when we could just express our concern- The importance of bringing up issues gently – not putting your spouse on the defensive- Six sneaky ways criticism gets into your conversation- The three-step formula to reframing conflict- Dealing with your mother-in-law in a more healthy way!And so much more!Resources:- 8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage- MYM 8-Week Coaching Program- Flow: The Psychology of Optimal ExperienceConnect with Robert and Sharla Snow:Website: http://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/Facebook - http://facebook.com/masteryourmarriageTikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

22 Mars 202323min

Is marital conflict normal? How about natural? Could it even be necessary? Sharla and Robert are here to prove to you that it's a resounding 'yes' to all three questions – and that after this episode, you'll never look at conflict the same way again. Robert has a sexy radio voice from a late flight and he's also brought back with him a 30,000 feet-high point of view with regard to respecting the differences he and Sharla share on raising their son. Sharla is boots on the ground (not shoveling snow), and together, this masterful couple is helping the rest of us master our marriage by talking about that one conflict that just won't go away. And the good news is we don't have to solve every problem in our marriage. The aerial view from the plane is that we start by acknowledging what we do have in common as a couple (wanting to raise a child who responds and acts from a place of love, for example) and then find compromise, seek empathy, and open the door to healthy dialogue. This way, we learn to manage our perpetual problems, not solve them.Robert and Sharla teach us that we shouldn't define a marriage by one set of values alone. Considering that no two people are going to see the world the exact same way anyway, let us learn to suspend judgment, lead with curiosity, and honor both sets of dreams that we have as a couple. The beauty of conflict is that we can learn to become more open-minded about seeing the world through our partner's eyes. Even if only one of us is flying at 30,000 feet."How you disagree is what can make (or break) your relationship." ~ Robert SnowIn This Episode:- Robert and Sharla discuss their differences of opinions with regard to raising their son- Roughly 7 out of 10 disagreements in a relationship are perpetual- Why do we disagree? Finding compromise, seeking empathy.- How much information can our conscious mind actually process?- How your individual upbringing has shaped the way you see the world- Keeping the door to dialogue open – avoiding gridlock- What is the deeply held belief or core value that is at stake?- Four steps you can take to start working toward compromise!And so much more!Resources:- 8 Pillars Of An Exceptional Marriage-MYM 8-Week Coaching Program- Flow: The Psychology of Optimal ExperienceConnect with Robert and Sharla Snow:- Website: http://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/- Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/- Facebook - http://facebook.com/masteryourmarriage- TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

15 Mars 202324min

How do we keep that early, ‘in love’ feeling alive? If the romance has started to taper off in your relationship, fear not! Robert and Sharla are here to breathe life into your relationship with an inspirational visualization technique to help you fire up your love strategy. If you’ve been buying your partner gifts, treating them to fancy dinners, and leaving thoughtful, romantic notes — and it’s still not working — then the chances are good that you aren’t employing the appropriate love strategy for your partner to feel loved in the way in which they need to feel loved. Can you remember a time when you felt totally, deeply loved? What were those feelings like? Our brains have a love language that is developed by our experience of feeling loved. And because this language can involve any one of our five senses, there’s a chance that the reason you’re shooting in the dark with your romantic gestures is that you aren’t speaking your partner’s subconscious love language – using the sense (or senses) that stimulate them. Becoming intentional about how you show your partner love is the exquisite gift of this episode, as we learn about our brain’s language for love — and then how to build a love strategy that keeps the spark alive, using that language. Please join Robert and Sharla in the language of love!“Your love strategy will have one absolute, critical component that must be present — or that feeling of love won’t be generated.” ~ Sharla SnowIn This Episode:- What is your unconscious love strategy? The secret to staying in love- The unique way that you arrive at the experience of feeling loved- Becoming intentional about how you show your partner love- Making your own Love Jar (and other strategies that may or may not work!)- How to avoid blindly shooting in the dark with words that don’t have meaning- How to fire your partner’s love strategyAnd so much more!Resources:- The 8 Pillars of an Exceptional Marriage - http://bit.ly/3Eksoqs- Love Strategies Workbook - https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/love-strategyConnect with Robert and Sharla Snow:- Website: masteryourmarriagepodcast.com - Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/- Facebook - Facebook.com/masteryourmarriage- TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

8 Mars 202320min

If trust is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship, how do we get it back when it starts getting eroded? Robert and Sharla are playing with a delicious paradox today: the idea that trust requires us to be vulnerable — and yet being vulnerable requires trust. Through personal, relatable examples as a couple, plus some Brené Brown insights, this power relationship couple proves that vulnerability is not weakness. Rather, vulnerability is a strength. The myth that vulnerability is weakness is dangerous to any relationship. We need to break that cycle as our relationships depend on it. There is nuance to our understanding of trust as we create a safe space for our vulnerabilities, and build on trust in everyday encounters (like a trip to Home Depot!) that are actually brief opportunities, or ’sliding door moments’ that prevent the erosion of this important relationship cornerstone. If you just thought of trust as your partner not cheating on you, or if you are eager to understand what trust through attunement can do to enhance your relationship, you are in for a treat. Please join Robert and Sharla as they get vulnerable themselves in this thought-provoking, change-creating episode!Join the celebration of the launch of our brand new podcast, "Master Your Marriage," and enter our giveaway for a chance to win an 8-week Coaching Program with us here: https://upvir.al/143028/lp143028“Do women really only respect their men when they are playing the hero?” ~ Sharla SnowIn This Episode:- Do women really only respect their men when they are playing the hero?- Providing a safe space for men to be vulnerable - Trustworthiness as the #1 desirable quality in a partner- Why trust is NOT just the absence of cheating- Sharla’s experience as a child witnessing her parents fight- How not trusting your own feelings can negatively impact your relationship - Why you should stop using phrases like “Man up!” - Trusting your partner with differences of opinion- An invitation to do better — understanding what is involved when trust is at stake- Where there is trust, there is connection. And where there is connection, there is oneness. And so much more!Resources:- The 8 Pillars of an Exceptional Marriage -https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/8-pillars- Trust Through Attunement Blueprint - https://masteryourmarriagepodcast.com/episode4Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:- Website: masteryourmarriagepodcast.com - Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/- Facebook - Facebook.com/masteryourmarriage- TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

1 Mars 202321min

Do you really need another person in your life to be happy, healthy, and reach your greatest potential? When viewed like this, is codependency such a bad word? Sharla and Robert aren't sitting on the fence on this one. In fact, they are challenging the stigmas around the word codependency and the way society teaches us to apply that label indiscriminately — and oftentimes detrimentally.Their reasoning is backed by compelling evidence that ranges from the way mushrooms form underground networks in forests as a way to strengthen through connection, to studies on attachment, the Dependency Paradox, and the results of 'shock tests' administered when you are holding your partner's hand.Sharla and Robert weave their personal stories of childbirth, and surgery, and the profound impact that holding your partner's hand can have on your own empowerment – all the while gently changing the narrative around how we sensationalize independence at the expense of shared intimacy and support. This conversation is worth listening to repeatedly as we celebrate the fact that we are actually hardwired for dependency on the ones we love – and that embracing this fact can lead us to ever greater personal success in life.Join the celebration of the launch of our brand new podcast, "Master Your Marriage," and enter our giveaway for a chance to win an 8-week Coaching Program with us here: https://upvir.al/143028/lp143028"Our culture has taught us to really reject this idea of codependency, believing that true independence and self-sustainability is a much healthier form of attachment." ~ Sharla SnowIn This Episode:- Should we aim for less entanglement in our relationships?- Understanding when dependency is healthy in an intimate relationship- Sharla's recount of the birth of their last child and how Robert inspired and empowered her- What does our culture have to say about codependency – are we being misled? - Understanding why our need for attachment is a human condition- What can we learn from mushrooms about our need for human connection?- Appreciating oneness as a superpower and survival advantage!- How Sharla supported Robert through his hernia surgery- The more dependent we are on each other, the more courageous we tend to be when facing everything outside of our relationship- What if your partner isn't fully available to you? And so much more!Resources:- The 8 Pillars of an Exceptional Marriage - http://bit.ly/3Eksoqs- Attached (Amir Levine) - https://www.attachedthebook.com/wordpress/- Flowers (Miley Cyrus) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7KNmW9a75Y- The Dependency Paradox - https://jeanhuber.com/the-dependency-paradox/- Mary Ainsworth’s Attachment Theory - https://study.com/academy/lesson/mary-ainsworth-theory-biography-quiz.htmlConnect with Robert...

22 Feb 202321min

How do we create a shared, purposeful, and meaningful life together while still appreciating our differences? This is the question Robert and Sharla Snow set out to answer in this poignant and impactful episode of Master Your Marriage. The answer lies in our understanding of rituals. Or perhaps more specifically, connection rituals as they apply to couples that may find themselves ‘flying off’ in the opposite direction to each other. Drawing on personal experience as a couple that thrives in each other's company, Robert and Sharla lay out a plan for how you can achieve this in your marriage too. There are studies and quotes, tips and anecdotes – appreciating intention and fostering purpose has never sounded better and more possible! Are you ready to become the designer of your relationship? Join the celebration of the launch of our brand new podcast, "Master Your Marriage," and enter our giveaway for a chance to win an 8-week Coaching Program with us here: https://upvir.al/143028/lp143028"When couples say ‘we've just grown into different people,’ I would challenge that you've always been different people." ~ Sharla SnowIn This Episode:- What are rituals? What are connection rituals?- Do we grow into different people?- The Sweaty T-Shirt Study – being attracted to your genetic opposite- Is attraction more about our differences than our similarities?- Addressing your values on an anniversary weekend- Understanding rituals as habits- How do you want to say goodbye before leaving for work?- Examples of connection rituals- 3 tips for creating meaningful ritualsAnd so much more!Resources:- Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones (Audible Audio Edition)Connect with Robert and Sharla Snow:- Website: masteryourmarriagepodcast.com - Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/- Facebook - Facebook.com/masteryourmarriage- TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

22 Feb 202318min

Complacency in marriage is the hot topic in this inaugural episode of Master Your Marriage. Robert and Sharla Snow are sharing the techniques and tips that they've acquired in over 31 years of marriage together. They are bringing value not only by dropping knowledge from scientific-based ideologies such as neurolinguistic programming and the Gottman Method – but by providing actionable steps for you to apply in your marriage today. There's a powerful visualization technique in the latter half of the episode that is both powerful and moving and might even give you goosebumps as you recall why you chose to be with your partner. Robert and Sharla set out their intention to have a greater impact on the marriages of the people they work with, expressing their gratitude and excitement to build this community with you. You are invited to embark on a journey of intentional action that may well save your marriage and reignite the spark that was once there. This journey into mastering your marriage begins here and now. Join the celebration of the launch of our brand new podcast, "Master Your Marriage," and enter our giveaway for a chance to win an 8-week Coaching Program with us here: https://upvir.al/143028/lp143028"Complacency might be the number one silent killer of marriages today. And I say silent because of how subtle it grows. It's not something that happens overnight." ~ Sharla SnowIn This Episode:- Finding real and tangible solutions to your relationship- What are the benefits of a happy marriage?- Introducing the TEAM method- When was the last time you felt deeply loved?- Understanding the danger of complacency in your marriage- What attempts at connection with your partner are you responding to? - The opposite of complacency is intentional action- Appreciating the power of visualization- Can you remember a time when you felt so happy to be with your partner?- Dropping down into the memory of when you felt loved and in love- When you change the way you look at things, the way you look at things changesAnd so much more!Resources:- John Gottman’s Love Lab (article) - This is the math equation that 'makes you or breaks you' in a marriage, says love researchers John and Julie Gottman- Virginia Satir (biography) - Virginia Satir BiographyConnect with Robert and Sharla Snow:- Website: masteryourmarriagepodcast.com - Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/masteryourmarriage/- Facebook - Facebook.com/masteryourmarriage- TikTok -https://www.tiktok.com/@masteryourmarriage

22 Feb 202322min

The average couple waits 6 years to get help in their marriage. That's 6 years of pain, hurt, frustration and lost opportunity. This podcast is designed to help you NOT become a part of that statistic.Hosted by Dr. Robert and Sharla Snow — themselves married for 31 years — The Master Your Marriage show is here with straight-talking guidance on how to fill your marriage with fun, friendship and love, without it ever feeling like "hard work."No matter how long you've been struggling with your marriage, or how long it's been since you've felt that "spark," we promise you, there is hope! Your MASTERFUL marriage starts here.

3 Feb 20231min