On Attachment12 Aug 2025

#201: How to Actually Heal from a Breakup

If you’re someone with anxious attachment patterns, the ending of a relationship can bring up some of your deepest wounds: feelings of abandonment, not being enough, being too much, or fears that you’ll never find love again.

In today’s episode, I’m offering a more grounded, intentional path through heartbreak — one that doesn’t rely on ruminating, obsessing, or waiting for closure from someone else. We’re talking about how to actually heal from a breakup, rather than just surviving it.

I’ll walk you through:

Why grieving fully is essential (and how we often mistake rumination for grief)
The stories we tell ourselves post-breakup, and how they shape our suffering
How to find closure within yourself, instead of waiting for your ex to give it to you
What it means to really learn the lessons of a breakup
Why getting clear on what you want in future relationships is one of the most powerful things you can do before moving on

Whether your breakup was recent or something you still carry with you, my hope is that this episode supports you in finding your way back to yourself — with clarity, compassion, and courage.

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