Ask Uncut - My Husband Cheated, Brought Home An STI & Wants Forgiveness

Hey Lifers! Welcome back to therapy Thursday where we answer your deep, dark and burning questions!Is there anything more awkward than the entire restaurant/bar singing happy birthday to you? What the heck do you do? Smile and sing along??Would you like to know that you were getting proposed to or prefer it to be a surprise? Britt and Keeshia met a couple where she definitely knew it was happening!Vibes for the week:Britt: Netflix American Murder: Laci PetersonKeeshia: House of Sculpt PilatesLaura: Couples Therapy on SBS on Demand/Paramount plus Then we jump into your questions! DO I TELL MY MUM I GOT SENT HER NUDES?Just over 2 years ago, I was getting ready for bed one night when I got a notification on messenger for a message request from someone I didn’t recognise. It said “I just thought you would like to know what your mother had been up to lately” followed by nude images of my mum and screenshots of texts exchanged between her and this person's husband. I was shocked and hoped that she hadn’t sent these to any of my other siblings. I ignored the message as much as I could until my youngest brother called me in hysterics telling me that he had just received the same message. I ended up reading the whole text exchange. There was a week where she visited him in his home town on her week off work. I looked at the dates and it all hit me again. She was meant to come visit me and my newborn interstate that week but said she had covid and had to stay where she was (his hometown). As terrible as I feel for my mum's partner, this is what shook me the most. She used me and my child as a reason to go where she was going just to “inconveniently” get covid and not be able to travel any further. She used us to cheat and it makes me sick. Ever since I found this out I haven’t been the same around her. I haven’t told her I know and I haven’t told her partner either. It’s an unspoken thing between my brother and I but we both feel the same towards her. I am also so mad at this woman for sending these explicit things to us as if we had anything to do with it. Why punish us and make us bear the weight of it all? Anyway, my questions are…My mum and her partner are still together with no bumps in sight. Do I tell my mum I know? Do I need to tell her partner? Or with it being over 2 years since do I just need a top notch therapist to deal with this myself? CAN WE HAVE SEX WHEN OUR CHILD IS ONLY METRES AWAY?My partner and I recently took our 2 year old daughter on her first family holiday. We all stayed in the same room with 2 queen beds. She slept in her own bed and I slept with my partner. My partner wanted to have sex on the holiday and would always make jokes like "what are you doing later" which were good for him shooting your shot. BUT my mindset was how can oh have sex when your child is sleeping legit no more than 1 metre away from you isn't that strange ? I guess my question is, are people having sex on holidays in the same room as their kids?? Is this a thing because it makes me cringe but he thinks it's so fine because she's asleep? DO I REFUND HERI sold a labour tens machine on facebook marketplace a few months ago for $60. I had originally purchased it as an ex hire machine but did not use it for my labour as it was too fast. I had tested it and it seemed to work fine to the best of my knowledge. Up until I sold it, it had sat in the pack it came in without the battery in it, untouched. Before I sold it to the lady I checked it again and it all seemed to work fine still. She had told me she wanted a receipt for the item as she had some trouble buying off marketplace before. I empathised with her but told her I can’t provide a receipt for it. Now a few months have passed and she has contacted me saying that it was rubbish, didn’t work as it should and is not in good working order. She also said that it impacted her birth and her experience was horrendous. I have sincerely apologised and explained my situation but I know she’s fishing for a refund. Do I refund her the money or just ignore her messages and move on? You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

28 Aug 202443min

Gus Worland is a TV, podcast and radio host, and the director and founder of the mental health foundation Gotcha4life. Gus is a passionate advocate for building mental fitness. Gus is particularly good at helping women connect with the men in their lives in ways that enable vulnerable and real conversations about their mental health. We chat: Gus’ childhood friendship with Hugh Jackman, or ‘Jacko’ as he calls him Whether Gus is jealous of Hugh’s friendship with Ryan Reynolds What mental fitness is & why we have such an issue with mental health now Where men disproportionately struggle Why so many men are suffering in silence and don’t speak up when they’re struggling Not letting anyone struggle alone Creating ‘villages’ around us  Gus also speaks about some really practical ways that we can connect with blokes, not try to ‘fix’ everything and create relationships where they feel comfortable speaking up.You can find more from Gus on Instagram Gotcha 4 Life Instagram Gotcha 4 Life Website If this conversation brought up things for you, please reach out for 24/7 support at Lifeline or call 13 11 14 You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

27 Aug 202457min

Hey Lifers, We are back from a little few day vacay! Laura's friend catch up FINALLY made it's way out of the group chat and into reality! She had a little mishap at the airport and there's a valet parker who hopes she never comes back.Britt and Producer Keeshia went to Bali to sus out Britt's wedding venues and food tastings. They ended up getting sick and missing some of the important parts. Chaos and motion sickness; very on brand for life uncut! The world is in mourning as JLo and Ben Affleck file for divorce! Lots of the world are talking about whether you think it's ever a good idea to go back to your ex. But, we're more interested in whether you think divorce can make you a better parent.There was a really interesting article by Kathryn Jezer-Morton in the Cut that explored the idea that the end of a marriage, while challenging, can lead to personal growth and improved parenting skills. We discuss: Whether our experiences of divorce or parents staying together influenced our views on relationships and marriage Whether you should or shouldn't stay in a step kid's life Whether we think divorce is always traumatic to kids How it shaped our views of conflict Parents who are only staying together for the kids - is this a good thing or a bad thing? Does being a 'child of divorce' make you more 'realistic' about marriage? We mentioned a podcast that we recorded with Esther Perel You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

26 Aug 20241h

It's our weekly round up! The best of the week from our National radio show THE PICKUP. Every week we are joined by our radio co-host Mitch Churi at 3pm on the KIIS Network. You can listen live on iHeart radio, or catch up here each week!For more follow @THEPICKUP on socials. On the show:  We have a surprise SPOILER it's James Bay Chat GPT roasts us Matty J wrote a book and Laura is proud as punch Headline and Headlies with Matty J See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

25 Aug 202430min

Hey Lifers,Welcome back to ask uncut where we answer all of your deep, dark and burning questions!It's Britt and Producer Keeshia's birthday and they're off on a romantic, couples holiday as a taste tester (quite literally) of Britt's wedding.Have you ever taken a vibrator to Bali? We might get stopped at customs for reasons we weren't expecting!If you have had a wedding, did you have a 'first look' and do photos before your ceremony or did you wait to have photos taken after the ceremony?Laura had an 'interesting' back drop in some of her wedding photos that caused a smell that didn't fit with the feelings of the moment.Vibes for the week: Laura: MCoBeauty Miracle Flawless Skin Foundation Keeshia: Podcast The rest is politics US Britt: Ilona Maher Instagram Account Then we jump into the questions: WHEN TO PUT BEST MOVES ON IN THE BEDROOMWhen is the right time to pull out your best moves in the bedroom? My best friend has started to see new people after coming out of a four year relationship. As her longest single friend she asked me when is it too soon to use your best moves on a new sexual partner? Which got me thinking, Do you leave it all on the floor on your first time because you want to impress them? Or do you keep some of those party tricks in the locker for future? I personally have had experiences in the past where I have been complimented on certain acts in the bedroom in almost a “you must do that alot” kind of way as if I’m being judged for having too much experience (charming I know). So I need to know your thoughts. Do you hold back with a new partner in fear of being judged for being too experienced or do you go hell for leather and pull out all the moves on the first go?  In this question we mentioned the great episode we recorded with Tara O Sex Isn't a Stage Show, So Drop the Act SHOULD I SUCK IT UP FOR MY HUSBAND'S SAKE OR IS THIS DISLOYAL?My husband's best friend (best man at our wedding) and his long term wife got a divorce due to him cheating. The wife was clearly devastated, they had started trying for a baby and it came as a shock to everyone. The husband less than 2 months on finds a new girlfriend and gets her pregnant, they have only a few weeks ago had the baby. I cannot bring myself to congratulate him. I am still close friends with my ex wife. And he is essentially living the life that they had planned together which is devastating to her. My husband is still close friends with him despite his actions, but I feel he's not the person we thought he was. Am I rude and selfish for not congratulating him on the baby's arrival and I should just suck it up for my husband's sake?FRIEND ONLY CONTACTS ME WHEN SHE WANTS ME TO BUY FROM HER BUSINESSI've had a friend for 10 years, we used to work together and have kept in touch ever since and see each other a few times a year. Recently, she’s started a business, and now all messages end in "do you want these products?" or ways of trying to sell. I am considering ending this friendship because of this. She usually takes weeks to reply to messages, but when she is trying to sell something to me, she replies straight away. When I said “no” she goes back to taking weeks to reply. I see that she is active on instagram stories 10x per day, trying to market and sell this product. I just feel a bit used. What should I do? Any advice would be appreciated. You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

21 Aug 202454min

Back for the second time is the hilarious Ellie Cole. Ellie is the most decorated Australian female paralympian of all time & a childhood cancer survivor. Ellie has joined the podcast before in Feb 2023  “I threw my leg at him and it hit him like a shish kebab”.  Ellie has just touched down back in Australia after doing poolside commentary in Paris at the 2024 Olympics. We have a whole bunch of Olympic questions for her like: -The funniest/most meme-able moments from Paris 2024 -What is the Olympic Village like? -Can and do the athletes all hook up with each other? -What are the Olympic beds like? -Should the Paralympics and Olympics be at the same time? -Pay parity, the ‘equal Olympics’ and misogyny in commentary  We also speak about Ellie becoming a mum, their IVF journey and her fears about her son being bullied when he gets to school for having two mums. You can find more from Ellie here! You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

20 Aug 202450min

Hey Lifers, Things are slightly more unhinged than normal due to some sleepy, post Logies Britt and Laura! Laura thinks Britt looks like checks notes Charlie Sheen...We take a bit of a peak behind the curtain of what actually happens at the Logies.We spoke about the highlights and lowlights, who left early, how the red carpet and outfits all work and also we are now Felix Cameron and Larry Emdur stans.Britt speaks about her mum overstepping on what was intended to be a generous offer and Laura finally shares the real story behind her wedding planner who was a bit of a scammer. You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

19 Aug 202442min

Hey Lifers, Welcome back to ask uncut where we answer all of your deep and burning questions! Britt has some terrible dating advice that includes faking a celebrity interaction.The tide seems to be turning on Raygun. There is more speculation around the ethics of her journey to the Olympics since we recorded on Monday morning.Laura helps Britt learn about her (Ben's) new home in Romania.  Vibes for the week: Laura: Two Doting Dads Book: The Quest For Free Time Keeshia: It Ends With Us Film Britt: Diary of a CEO podcast with Francis Ngannou Then we jump into your questions! AM I UNFULFILLED OR IS THIS NORMAL? I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years. I have kids, he doesn’t. I have always felt like he is my best mate, not necessarily my penguin but at the same time it’s been 5 years we’ve put in the work and my kids now adore him. His best friend moved in with us a year ago. I obviously noticed this man was attractive and I’ve known him for a long time but I was happy and content with my partner and I thought hey it’s normal to just appreciate someone’s good looks.  Until… he messaged me one night. I was at work and he had been drinking. It said  “Hey please don’t repeat what I’m about to tell you.” He goes on to tell me that he finds me irresistible and the reason he chose to take a FIFO (3 on, 1 off) job was because he struggles to be alone with me. He said he thinks about me non stop.  I would be lying if I didn’t say I felt the lust. I went home, slept it off and felt so guilty that I showed my boyfriend the messages. He kind of just said ‘Oh wow he is thinking with the wrong body part’ and has since pretended like it never happened. Now I’m in a tailspin. I dream about this man. He creeps into my mind constantly. He comes home in a week and I’ve tried gently suggesting to my boyfriend that we ask him to move out. Obviously I haven’t told him that I am attracted to his best friend but I just said that it’s a little awkward. My partner just replied that the extra income is helpful and he probably won’t try anything. But what he doesn’t know is that his friend has messaged me since telling me he is sorry, however I am just so beautiful and kind, how I’m the sweetest and he can’t help but think about me. I truly think that I’m just feeling this way because after 5 years and being a full time working mum, I feel invisible to my family so having a man call me irresistible is a thrill. I do not want to go against my morals and destroy someone’s trust over a fling but I also don’t want to tell my partner how I feel. Should I be looking at this as a sign I’m unfulfilled in my relationship and maybe it’s time to move on (not with his friend) or is this just a normal reaction to having an attractive man show me attention and once he has moved out I can just move past this without hurting my boyfriend? DON'T WANT TO WEAR THE BRIDAL OUTFITHow do I tell the bride and groom of a wedding I’m attending later this year that the bridal party outfit they have chosen for me is awful and I don’t want to wear it? Keep in mind they also asked me to pay for it (so now I am out of pocket too). I live in a different state to them, so had to order online without trying the outfit before buying. It is unflattering, does not suit my shape, and I feel so uncomfortable in it. I do not want to wear this in public, let alone in front of a crowd at a wedding. I had suggested early on that if I’m paying for it, could I buy a nice dress in their colours that I’d be likely to wear again. They insisted however they wanted everyone to be ‘uniform’. Do I just have to suck it up, as the day is not about me? (Also, this is a destination wedding so I am already spending thousands on travel and accommodation to attend) I DON'T LIKE HIM DRINKING ALONEMy husband and I had a disagreement and both genuinely could not work out who was in the wrong, so reverting to the brains trust! My husband works shift work, so often has midweek days off or finishes really early on weekdays that I'm working. Sometimes (say once a week) he likes to go to the local pub by himself and have a few beers until I finish work. He usually comes home tipsy on these occasions. I feel uncomfortable about him drinking by himself and coming home tipsy after doing so. I don't have any issue with him drinking with friends or if we have a few drinks together - it's just the by himself aspect (which I think stems from growing up with parents who had issues with alcohol). He gets upset by this and feels like I'm trying to control how he spends his free time. He doesn't think it's unreasonable to do this once a week. I don't have an issue with him doing any activity by himself that doesn't involve alcohol, so don't feel that I'm being controlling. Who is in the wrong?! Am I being unreasonable? We both have had multiple convos about this and both are not sure if each of us are in the wrong. For context, we are in our early 30's and have no kids, just living at home the 2 of us (and otherwise have an amazing relationship)! You can watch us on Youtube Find us on Instagram Join us on tiktok Or join the Facebook Discussion Group Tell your mum, tell your dad, tell your dog, tell your friend and share the love because WE LOVE LOVE! xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

14 Aug 202452min