#451 F-ing vs. Making Love: What's the Difference?

Why is sexual confidence so important in great sex and relationships? How can I gain more sexual confidence? What is body neutrality and how is it different from “loving yourself”? What if I don’t think I’m hot or sexy? How can I discover my inner sexy beast? The internet's resident sexpert Dr. Tara answers all this, and to add a little more spice to the subject we also pick her brain about her top tips for sex positions. About our guest: Dr. Tara Suwinyattichaiporn, a pioneering expert in sexual and relational communication, is a tenured professor at California State University Fullerton. Her groundbreaking research, showcased in her textbook "Sexual Communication: Research in Action," has earned her awards and recognition. She is also a co-host and sexpert on the UK’s popular TV show “Celebs Go Dating.” As a sex and relationship coach, Dr. Tara hosts the acclaimed "Luvbites by Dr. Tara" Podcast, focusing on sexual wellness and exploration. Her influence spans various media outlets, including features in KTLA News, Cosmopolitan, Forbes, and her own column ‘Sexplore with Dr. Tara’ in Women’s Health Magazine UK. A TEDx Speaker, she presented "Become Sexually Powerful," drawing from her extensive study on sexual satisfaction and her personal journey from anxious immigrant to confident Sexpert. Dr. Tara's mission is to normalize sex talks, guiding people toward passionate and fulfilling lives through confidence and communication coaching. With a massive social media following, she's one of the most influential sex and relationship experts online. Links: https://www.luvbites.co https://www.instagram.com/luvbites.co?igsh=OGQ5ZDc2ODk2ZA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr Join us April 24th-29th, 2024 for The Shameless Sex Retreat: Unleash Your Shameless Self - in Tulum! Spaces are limited to reserve your spot ASAP here or at https://tri.ps/ye3v8 Do you love us? Do you REALLY love us? Then order our book now! Go to https://shamelesssex.com to snag your copy Support Shameless Sex by sending us gifts via our Amazon Wish List Other links: Become a stress-free top-notch chef this holiday season and get FREE breakfast for life at http://HelloFresh.com/chipanddipfree Get 10% off + free shipping with code SHAMELESS10 on Uberlube AKA our favorite lubricant at https://uberlube.com Get 10% off while mastering the art of pleasure at http://OMGyes.com/shameless Get 15% off all of your sex toys with code SHAMELESSSEX at http://purepleasureshop.com. And get 20% off Aneros or Womanizer products now through February 8th with code VDAYLOVE24

6 Feb 20241h 23min

What is... The “Whorearchy” and how is it related to the social expectations that drive sex-related commerce? A secrecy kink and how is it connected to our creative and sexual expression? An erotic bucket list and how can people create their own? The benefit of experiencing rejection, and how can people learn to better handle it when it comes? About our guest: Our guest today is Wyoh Lee, a photographer, researcher and creative educator dedicated to making the world a sexier, more loving place. Since 2013, she has helped people embrace their full range of creative self-expression—including sex, our “original creativity”. She supports individuals, couples and moresomes in understanding and prioritizing their desires through personalized breakthrough sessions and retreats that might include writing, photography, video, paint, collage, music, movement, talk, touch and/or whatever other medium feels relevant to the goal. On her podcast Sex Stories, guests share details of their personal and/or work-related histories in an effort to add social and emotional context to the sex ed most of us never got. She is currently getting her masters in Sexual Health and is obsessed with studying the Whorearchy—a term that describes the hierarchical attitudes among and towards sex workers that shifts, depending on the point of view. Her favorite thing aside from actually having sex is learning what people love or wonder about it. To learn more visit https://www.wyohlee.com Join us April 24th-29th, 2024 for The Shameless Sex Retreat: Unleash Your Shameless Self - in Tulum! Spaces are limited to reserve your spot ASAP here or at https://tri.ps/ye3v8 Do you love us? Do you REALLY love us? Then order our book now! Go to https://shamelesssex.com to snag your copy Support Shameless Sex by sending us gifts via our Amazon Wish List Other links: Get the pleasure and heath benefits from pumping up your bits at https://aprilamy.com Get $10 your next STI test by going to http://shamelesspod.com, then clicking STDCheck, and use code Shameless Get 10% off + free shipping with code SHAMELESS10 on Uberlube AKA our favorite lubricant at https://uberlube.com Get 10% off while mastering the art of pleasure at http://OMGyes.com/shameless Get 15% off all of your sex toys with code SHAMELESSSEX at http://purepleasureshop.com

30 Jan 20241h 7min

Where did the idea of “happily ever after” or “finding the one” even come from in the first place? Is it even obtainable? What are some of the common myths that people buy into regarding dating and relationships? What are some of the ways people can break free from those dating myths and create the dating or love life they truly desire? About our guest: Damona Hoffman is a celebrity dating coach, host of the award-winning podcast Dates & Mates, and the official love expert of The Drew Barrymore Show. She has written dating columns for the LA Times and the Washington Post and worked as a dating expert and spokesperson for top dating apps including OkCupid, Match, and Bumble. She lives in Los Angeles with her husband and two children. In F The Fairytale, Damona Hoffman dismantles the dating habits and beliefs that have been leading us astray—those notions of instant chemistry and the relentless quest for "the One." She points out how modern daters are clinging to outdated rulebooks that served our grandparents and parents well but have failed to adapt to the seismic shifts in technology and gender equality. Like many, I too once subscribed to these outdated ideals. The consequence? We find ourselves in an era with more single adults in the U.S. than ever before. But Damona empowers readers to shatter these limiting dating myths and seize control of their own love narratives. This isn't just another dating book; it's a refreshing exploration of how factors like race, class, and gender intersect with our dating lives. Dr. Drew Pinsky calls the book "entertaining, smart, and fun; the reader will find something here that speaks to them and enhances their dating lives." To learn more go to damonahoffman.com Join us April 24th-29th, 2024 for The Shameless Sex Retreat: Unleash Your Shameless Self - in Tulum! Spaces are limited to reserve your spot ASAP here Do you love us? Do you REALLY love us? Then order our book now! Go to shamelesssex.com to snag your copy Listen to Sex Ed With DB here: sexedwithdb.com Support Shameless Sex by sending us gifts via our Amazon Wish List Other links: Get 30 days of free hot audio erotica at dipseastories.com/shameless Get 10% off + free shipping with code SHAMELESS10 on Uberlube AKA our favorite lubricant at uberlube.com Get 10% off while mastering the art of pleasure at  OMGyes.com/shameless Get 15% off all of your sex toys with code SHAMELESSSEX at purepleasureshop.com

23 Jan 20241h 2min

Why is sex in long term relationships heavily misunderstood? What are the myths most people have been taught about sex - particularly in LTR’s? What is the truth about spontaneous desire? What are some of the best ways partners can talk about sex and desire with one another? And what can people do with mismatched desire or when someone isn’t “in the mood”?  About our guest: Emily Nagoski, PhD is the New York Times bestselling, award-winning author of the revolutionary book Come as You Are, co-author of Burnout, and is now releasing her third book Come Together: The Science (and Art!) of Creating Lasting Sexual Connections. A gifted and engaging speaker, Emily is an expert on women's sexual wellbeing, healthy relationships, and the prevention of sexual violence and harassment. People bring Emily, because Emily "brings the science." To learn more go to emilynagoski.com Join us April 24th-29th, 2024 for The Shameless Sex Retreat: Unleash Your Shameless Self - in Tulum! Spaces are limited to reserve your spot ASAP here Order our book now! Go to shamelesssex.com and get free access to our online workshop How to Pamper Your Partner for every book preorder (offer/workshop is exclusive to preorders). Support Shameless Sex by sending us gifts via our Amazon Wish List Other links: Get the pleasure and heath benefits from pumping up your bits at aprilamy.com Get $10 your next STI test by going to shamelesspod.com, then clicking STDCheck, and use code Shameless Get 10% off + free shipping with code SHAMELESS10 on Uberlube AKA our favorite lubricant at uberlube.com Get 10% off while mastering the art of pleasure at  OMGyes.com/shameless Get 15% off all of your sex toys with code SHAMELESSSEX at purepleasureshop.com. And get 20% off rechargeable sex toys during January 2024 with code RECHARGE2024

16 Jan 20241h 7min

This episode is from a live Q and A at the Vibe Show in Hollywood, CA. It's two days filled with sex toys, badass educators like Dirty Lola, Tyomi, and Susan Bratton, as well as awesome humans who want to learn more about sex and pleasure. Listening on or before January 13th, 2024? AND in or near Hollywood? Well you're in luck because there's one more day of Vibe. Come visit us and join the sexy fun! To learn more visit vibeshow.com

13 Jan 202432min

This episode is all about fingering and hand sex on orifices - specifically pussies and assholes. Repeat guest Darshana Avila teaches us all about how to use your hands on all the holes for more pleasure (and even better orgasms). About our guest: Darshana is nurturing a culture of Erotic Wholeness. Many know her from her groundbreaking work on Netflix's Sex, Love & goop where she shared her trauma-informed, nature-based, justice-oriented approach to somatic sex and intimacy education. In her private practice and group journeys she supports people to embrace their erotic nature and thrive in their lives and relationships. To learn more visit darshanaavila.com Join us April 24th-29th, 2024 for The Shameless Sex Retreat: Unleash Your Shameless Self - in Tulum! Spaces are limited to reserve your spot ASAP here Order our book now! Go to shamelesssex.com and get free access to our online workshop How to Pamper Your Partner for every book preorder (offer/workshop is exclusive to preorders). Other links: Become a stress-free top-notch chef this holiday season and get FREE breakfast for life at HelloFresh.com/chipanddipfree Get 10% off + free shipping with code SHAMELESS10 on Uberlube AKA our favorite lubricant at uberlube.com Get 10% off while mastering the art of pleasure at  OMGyes.com/shameless Get 15% off all of your sex toys with code SHAMELESSSEX at purepleasureshop.com. And get 20% off rechargeable sex toys during January 2024 with code RECHARGE2024

9 Jan 20241h 26min

In this ad-free bonus episode we get to know Meesh, a badass retired elite rhythmic gymnast who is now a kinky poly nudist healer. Meesh shares how she utilized sex as part of her personal healing journey from CPTSD, what it means to her (and how it enriches her life) to be a nudist and how this differs from being an exhibitionist, as well as how she tapped into her ultimate free sexual self (and how you can too!). Stay tuned to be inspired by the wonderful Meesh. About our guest: Meesh is an artist embodiment coach and writer. Her mission in life is to bring freedom to people’s lives through embracing curiosity. Meesh has 10 plus years of coaching experience. She began her journey to feel freedom after she moved out of her parents at 18. She has since learned the affects that awareness and authenticity can have on a person’s healing journey and implements them into her embodiment coaching. She spends her time writing, climbing, coaching, traveling, studying spirituality and exploring movement. Follow Meesh: https://www.instagram.com/mystic_meesh https://www.livethequestion.fitness

5 Jan 202450min

Can psychedelics (mushrooms, ayahuasca, MDMA, ketamine, etc) help with sexual healing? If so, how? Can they enhance eroticism and pleasure? What is psychedelic therapy? How can someone find the right therapist or practitioner for them? About our guest: Dr. Cat Meyer, PsyD, LMFT is a licensed psychotherapist #88224 specializing in sex, trauma, and ketamine assisted psychotherapy (KAP). She is a published researcher and international speaker dedicated to evolving the relationship we have surrounding sexuality and our bodies. Dr. Cat integrates various schools of thought including neuro​science, somatic theory, psychedelics, psychology, EMDR trauma therapy, and sexual health in her work for private practice, workshops, and transformational retreats that are designed to help people create a deeply fulfilling, prosperous relational and sexual life. For personal therapy work, check her out at Psychology Today. ​She co-hosts Un.done Yoga, a women’s sensual yoga + breathwork experience with singer songwriter, Lena Ozea to undo the negative messages we receive about our bodies while bringing women back to the relationship with their sensuality. She is the co-creator of Goddess Celebration, an annual large scale women’s day retreat held in Malibu, CA, dedicated to uplifting and celebrating the goddess in every women. ​Dr. Cat is also host to the popular podcast Eat.Play.Sex on iTunes, in which she brings you expert guests talking on how to ignite your love life both mentally, physically, and relationally. She also gives daily advice and wisdoms about all things sex, love, and yoga on Instagram @sexloveyoga. To learn more visit sexloveyoga.com Join us April 24th-29th, 2024 for The Shameless Sex Retreat: Unleash Your Shameless Self - in Tulum! Spaces are limited to reserve your spot ASAP here Order our book now! Go to shamelesssex.com and get free access to our online workshop How to Pamper Your Partner for every book preorder (offer/workshop is exclusive to preorders). Other links: Get the pleasure and heath benefits from pumping up your bits at aprilamy.com Get 10% off + free shipping with code SHAMELESS10 on Uberlube AKA our favorite lubricant at uberlube.com Get 10% off while mastering the art of pleasure at  OMGyes.com/shameless Get 15% off all of your sex toys with code SHAMELESSSEX at purepleasureshop.com. And get 20% off rechargeable sex toys during January 2024 with code RECHARGE2024

2 Jan 20241h 18min