Love on the Spectrum vs Reality: 3 Generations of Autism Stories

Love on the Spectrum vs Reality: 3 Generations of Autism Stories

Cliff is joined in this episode by his mum to explore three generations of neurodiversity within their family. From his grandmother's unrecognised traits to his daughter Eva's current struggles with autism, ADHD, and sensory processing disorder, they discuss the hidden patterns that run through families. His mother shares stories about Eva's masking behaviours, the park incident that changed everything and even how food colourings can affect behaviour. Episode Reveals • How masking is very real and can be deceptive. Children with autism often appear perfectly behaved in public settings, making it difficult for others to recognise their struggles and leading to delayed diagnosis and support. • Artificial food dyes have been linked to hyperactivity, aggression, depression and meltdowns in sensitive children, making dietary monitoring important for behaviour management. • Transitions for neurodiverse children require advance warning. Autistic children particularly need preparation time before changes, using strategies like "five more minutes" warnings rather than abrupt transitions that can trigger meltdowns. • Meal times can create safe spaces for children to share problems and build trust with parents, which is essential for supporting children. • Tools like doodle pads, fidget items, and understanding of sensory overload are essential for learning, not distractions to be eliminated. • Parents don't need school referrals to seek autism assessments; going directly to your GP can prevent years of delays in getting proper support. • Private psychological assessments can provide the detailed evidence needed to win EHCP appeals when local authority assessments fall short. • Neurodiversity is hereditary and often unrecognised. Traits frequently pass through generations, with older family members only recognising their own autism or ADHD after grandchildren are diagnosed. BEST MOMENTS "It was like she wasn't there. It was like she wasn't in control." "I used to like the quiet. I still like it. I don't, I struggle with situations where there's lots of noise." "You are needed. We are all needed. " "It's not labelling, it's identifying that we need some different strategies to support her." RESOURCES 👉 10% off your first order Vivanmn LINK - https://vivanmn.com/cliff “What To do when your child shuts down” book out now - https://amzn.eu/d/iOMsOrF New Parenting Autism and ADHD community - Discord because Meta is shutting down fb messenger community chats, we can continue the conversation here - https://discord.gg/SbXd34QV CONTACT ME · Instagram: @cliff_kilmister08 · Facebook: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/cliff.kilmister/⁠ X - @KilmisterCliff HOST BIO Cliff Kilmister is a dedicated parent, advocate, and cat whisperer with firsthand experience raising a child with autism, ADHD, and Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). Having navigated the challenges of school refusal, meltdowns, and sensory sensitivities, Cliff brings an empathetic, real-world perspective to the podcast. When he's not helping his child thrive, he’s dodging the evil stares of his three cats, who are plotting to take over the world (fortunately, they still haven’t figured out how to use the tin opener). Cliff offers practical advice, expert insights, and personal stories to help families facing similar struggles. Cliff’s daughter will be a regular guest, sharing her experiences and strategies that work for her. And joining him in this journey is his wife, Annie, who will also contribute to the podcast with her unique perspective and support. Cliff is focused on connecting with professionals and networks to raise awareness about the growing need for the education system to adapt to the increasing neurodiverse population. Join the community on Patreon to share experiences, access exclusive content, and work together for change! This Podcast has been brought to you by Disruptive Media. https://disruptivemedia.co.uk/

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Avsnitt(55)

Body Doubling, Chunking and Hope: Practical Executive Function Support for Autistic & ADHD Students with Dr Tara Williams

Body Doubling, Chunking and Hope: Practical Executive Function Support for Autistic & ADHD Students with Dr Tara Williams

What happens when your child is doing fine academically, but socially they're drowning? They might understand the material, they can answer the questions, they might even be top of the class, or maybe...

10 Juni 51min

5 “Normal” Rules Neurodiverse Brains Struggle With (But No One Talks About)

5 “Normal” Rules Neurodiverse Brains Struggle With (But No One Talks About)

Neurodiverse people aren’t broken – we’re wired differently. What works for most other people doesn’t always work for us, especially when it comes to getting things done, motivating ourselves and hand...

3 Juni 35min

Getting Access to The Right Type of Assessment with Lisa Bond

Getting Access to The Right Type of Assessment with Lisa Bond

Today, Cliff welcomes Lisa Bond, who is herself neurodiverse. Lisa is a training, learning and development specialist who has hands on experience of counselling, advocacy, and litigation for neurodive...

27 Maj 54min

Beyond Parental Controls: Raising Porn-Literate, Neurodivergent Kids in a Digital World with Cath Hakanson

Beyond Parental Controls: Raising Porn-Literate, Neurodivergent Kids in a Digital World with Cath Hakanson

When it comes to sex and porn, many of us feel it’s “wrong” to talk to our kids – especially if they’re autistic, ADHD or highly sensitive. But if we don’t talk, the internet will, and it won’t explai...

20 Maj 1h 1min

Tag‑Teaming Meltdowns & Mess: Real‑Life ADHD Family Strategies That Actually Help

Tag‑Teaming Meltdowns & Mess: Real‑Life ADHD Family Strategies That Actually Help

I’m celebrating the 50th episode with two very special guests – my daughter Eva and my wife. This is an honest, funny, and tender look inside our “neuro-spicy” family life. We talk about the everyday ...

13 Maj 51min

Embrace Your Inner Coach: Learning to Tap Into Your Winning Spirit with Tom Mitchell

Embrace Your Inner Coach: Learning to Tap Into Your Winning Spirit with Tom Mitchell

Today's guest shouldn't be here - and that's exactly why this episode matters. He felt like an impostor talking about neurodiversity because this isn't his specialty. But this isn't about labels or li...

6 Maj 50min

When Your Child Won’t Get Out of Bed: Anxiety, Avoidance, and the CALM Reset

When Your Child Won’t Get Out of Bed: Anxiety, Avoidance, and the CALM Reset

Does your child “just not get out of bed” for school? Maybe mornings dissolve into stand‑offs, shouting, threats of consequences… and yet nothing changes. You’re exhausted, they’re shut down, and ever...

29 Apr 25min

Calm First, Reset Later: Supporting Anxious, Neurodivergent Kids After School

Calm First, Reset Later: Supporting Anxious, Neurodivergent Kids After School

Does your child come home from school, barely say a word, and vanish into their room? Maybe you get a grunt, “What’s for dinner?” and suddenly the whole house flips - doors slam, voices rise, and you’...

22 Apr 26min

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