Where is Napoleon's Penis?

Inquiring minds want to know: where is Napolean's penis these days? We will give you a hint: it's not with the rest of his body, but it's a cautionary tale for today's despots that we think should be more widely known. To be clear, the whereabouts of Napolean's penis is not discussed in Anne Macdonald's No Idle Hands: The Social History of American Knitting, but many other fascinating historical tidbits are. We are now up to the Civil War, and guess what both sides, Union and Confederate, need the most? Yup, you guessed it: SOCKS. "'Send socks!' pleaded Civil War soldiers, and when their heartrending stories of bleeding, frostbitten and blistered feet reached 'the womenfolk,' there followed an unprecedented fever of sock-knitting 'for the boys'" (p. 97). The dearth of socks even inspired Albert M. Hubbard to compose "The Knitting Song: Dedicated to the Patriotic Ladies of the North," "a zesty tribute that quickly became a great favorite with choral groups at fairs and parlor sing-alongs and accounted for even further acceleration of knitting" (p. 102).

While the North had more resources and infrastructure thanks to the unfortunately named "United States Sanitary Commission," the women of South showed their devotion and ingenuity in other ways. Scarlet O'Hara's famous upcycling of the drawing room curtains into a dress had its roots in real events, and later made for great comedy on the Carol Burnett Show. And how can we not admire Lucy Nickolson Lindsay of Missouri for delivering vials of quinine and morphine hidden in the coiled locks of her hair and 22 pairs of socks tucked in the hems of her skirts to the frontline? Women on both sides sent notes to the troops in the socks and garments they made to inspire hope for better days:

Brave Sentry, on your lonely beat

May these blue stockings warm your feet

And when from wars and camps you part

May some fair knitter warm your heart."

Quoted in Anne L. Macdonald, No Idle Hands: The Social History of American Knitting, p. 105.

These are the tales from American history that warm our hearts! And if you want something tasty to warm your palate, may we suggest our recipe for roasted balsamic onions? A treat in salads or sandwiches--tune in and try it!