How to Feel More Secure in Your Relationship | LHS Classic E251

How to Feel More Secure in Your Relationship | LHS Classic E251

If you’ve ever questioned where you stand with your partner or second-guessed their love, this will help you feel more grounded, connected, and secure. This episode first aired on June 21, 2021 (Episode 251), and I’m bringing it back because so many of you said it hit home. Ever replayed a conversation, overread a text, or felt on edge when your partner seemed distracted even when nothing was “wrong”? That kind of relationship anxiety can keep you chasing reassurance. I’m joined by my colleague Georgi, a marriage and family therapist on our Growing Self team, to talk about why security can feel slippery and what it takes to build emotional safety that lasts. We look at how attachment injuries, big and small, quietly shape how you show up in love. Early experiences, broken trust, and even subtle disappointments can make connection feel risky and drive patterns like jealousy, anger, or withdrawal. Together, we talk about interrupting those cycles, hearing what your anxiety is trying to say, and inviting your partner into repair with curiosity rather than blame. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Introduction: Why It’s Hard to Feel Secure in Your Relationship 07:05 How Attachment Shapes Emotional Safety and Trust 10:40 When Insecurity Shows Up as Anger or Jealousy 18:50 What Fuels Insecurity: Attachment Injuries and Unmet Needs 26:25 Inviting Your Partner In and Re-building Connection 30:35 Responding With Empathy Instead of Defensiveness 35:40 The House Analogy: Re-building Trust Brick by Brick 37:15 Emotional Safety as the Core of a Healthy Relationship As you listen, notice what shows up for you. When anxiety spikes, what story starts running—and how do you usually respond? Do you shut down, reach for control, or start hunting for proof that you’re okay? Try pausing to ask what you truly need in that moment: comfort, reassurance, or a steadier sense of safety within yourself. If communication is adding to the tension, try my Communication that Connects Masterclass. It’s a simple way to step out of those conflict loops and have conversations that build understanding. It includes a workbook so you can practice right away! You might also like my How Healthy Is Your Relationship? quiz. It’s quick, gives you language for what’s happening, and points to where your relationship could use more care. Want ongoing support between episodes? Find me on Instagram, Facebook, or YouTube. I share fresh tools and encouragement to help you create the love, happiness, and success you deserve. If this episode sparked something, or an idea for a future topic, I’d love to hear from you. Let’s talk! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

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#212 - Being Honest With Yourself

#212 - Being Honest With Yourself

Being honest with yourself is a fundamental part of authentic personal growth... but it can be hard to do. We all have blindspots, stories we tell ourselves, and things we’re not conscious of that are holding us back. Today's podcast with therapist and life coach Josephine Marin can help you get clarity about your authentic truth so that you can move forward fearlessly. xo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

21 Sep 202050min

#211 - How to Feel "Good Enough" & Overcome Imposter Syndrome

#211 - How to Feel "Good Enough" & Overcome Imposter Syndrome

Do you struggle to feel like you are good enough? It's not just you: Many people — no matter how successful or accomplished — still feel like they're not *quite* measuring up. Today's episode does a deep dive into HOW to feel that you're good enough. Plus, psychologist and executive coach Dr. Lisa Orbe Austin shares how push back against self-doubt and overcome imposter syndrome. Follow along! Text ESTEEM to 55444 to get the Self Esteem Quiz discussed in this episode. xo, Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby  www.GrowingSelf.com

14 Sep 202051min

#210 - Being Organized

#210 - Being Organized

If you are feeling increasingly overwhelmed by life and trying to figure out how you’re going to juggle a zillion different things and stay on top of it all.... this episode is for you. In this episode, Denver psychologist Dr. Danielle Kahlo spills the beans on why conventional "how to get organized" tips never work for long, and how to instead focus on cultivating the type of "organized mindset" that makes everything else fall into place: Priorities, time, tasks, and stuff too. Being organized makes you less stressed and anxious, it improves your relationships, and it makes you feel better about yourself and your life. Being organized is important, and it begins from within! Listen, and learn how. xo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

7 Sep 202036min

#209 - How To Get Unstuck

#209 - How To Get Unstuck

If you've been feeling trapped lately, and like you don't know which way to turn — this episode is for you. We're doing a deep dive into how to get mentally and emotionally unstuck with life and career coach Elise Ross.  Listen for actionable advice and new ideas that will help you break free and start moving forward again. xo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

24 Aug 202055min

#208 - Letting Go Of Resentment

#208 - Letting Go Of Resentment

Are you holding on to resentment about hurtful things that have happened in the past? Is your partner? In today's episode, we’re talking about how to let go of resentment in your relationship, so that you can both move forward, put the past behind you, and start enjoying each other again. xo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

17 Aug 202046min

#207 - Burnout Prevention and Recovery

#207 - Burnout Prevention and Recovery

If you've been feeling mentally and emotionally exhausted, and that the daily grind is relentless... you are not alone. The realities "corona-life" are wearing down even the sturdiest and most productive among us.  Help is here: Today's show is all about helping you recover from burnout, reclaim control, cultivate resilience, reprioritize time and energy, and craft a sustainable "burnout prevention" plan for yourself, your career and your family. With love,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby GrowingSelf.com

10 Aug 202055min

#206 - Moving Forward: The Path of Personal Growth

#206 - Moving Forward: The Path of Personal Growth

A listener asked, “I want to grow and move forward, but HOW?” Today, I'm giving you the inside scoop — from my perspective as a therapist and life coach — into what the process of personal growth actually involves so that YOU can move forward. We're discussing: The circumstances that set the stage for growth (and why now is the perfect time) How to transform a "breakdown" into a "breakthrough" Why courageously tapping into your dark emotions is essential What things may seem like “obstacles” but actually ARE the path forward in disguise! The key turning points that accelerate your growth Shifting from a victim mindset to one of empowerment How to release your participation in old patterns for good And more! I hope this discussion provided you with both hope and direction as you find your own path forward. Questions or comments about this episode? Share them! "Moving Forward" @ GrowingSelf.com xo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby

2 Aug 202053min

#205 - The Signs of Low Self Esteem

#205 - The Signs of Low Self Esteem

How healthy is your self esteem? If don't feel good about YOU, it's hard stay in a good place and feel confident, hopeful, and effective. In this episode, we'll explore the signs of low self esteem and its causes, and discuss the action oriented strategies that will help you feel good again.  Bonus! Text the word "ESTEEM" to 55444 to get the "How Healthy is Your Self Esteem" quiz, to see where you land on the spectrum of self esteem. To growth! xoxo,  Dr. Lisa Marie Bobby www.GrowingSelf.com

27 Juli 20201h 12min

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