Resting in Being Deeply Loved: How Empathy Transforms You w/Drs. Bill and Kristi Gaultiere, 1-2 Pairing
Bill and Kristi Gaultiere discovered that before they could truly empathize with each other in marriage, they first needed to experience God's deep empathy for them. In this conversation, the Type 1 and Type 2 couple share how understanding their different Enneagram approaches to apologies and empathy transformed their relationship. They discuss practical calming exercises, breaking cycles of anger, and how each Enneagram type naturally blocks empathy. Bill and Kristi talk about their new book "Deeply Loved: Receiving and Reflecting God's Great Empathy for You" and share type-specific tools for building marriages where authentic connection feels safer than emotional withdrawal. Watch here on YouTube! "Reading this book is like sitting with close friends who truly get what you're going through."--Dr. Tim Clinton, president of the American Association of Christian Counselors (AACC) "Bill and Kristi Gaultiere have provided an oasis of care in the 'empathy desert.'"--John Ortberg, teacher at BecomeNew; author of Steps Next Steps: Get the brand new book by the Gaultiere Deepy Loved right here: https://a.co/d/iGXog7V Find everything you need from Bill and Kristi here at Soul Shepherding https://www.soulshepherding.org/ Find Soul Shepherding at Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/soulshepherding/?hl=en Come on retreat with them! https://www.soulshepherding.org/institute/ Get healthy together as a couple this Fall! Begin your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Leave Christa a podcast question anonymously by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
8 Sep 41min
From Criticism to Connection w/FamilyLife Today's Dave and Ann Wilson, 7-7 Pairing
Join us for a heartwarming conversation with Dave and Ann Wilson, the beloved husband-and-wife team behind FamilyLife Today and former co-founders of Kensington Church in Michigan. As two Enneagram 7s married for over 40 years (and former Detroit Lions chaplains!), they share the beautiful chaos and hard-won wisdom of building lasting love when you're both wired for joy, adventure, and avoiding the hard stuff. We dive into Ann's new book "How to Speak Life to Your Husband: When All You Want to Do Is Yell at Him," exploring the fascinating dynamics of criticism versus encouragement, what men actually hear when women express frustration, and how couples can break negative cycles while honoring their type patterns. Whether you're a fellow 7, married to one, or just curious about how personality shapes our closest relationships, this episode offers practical wisdom wrapped in the kind of hope and authenticity that makes marriage feel possible again. Watch on YouTube Get Ann's new book: https://a.co/d/a7Ok2NU Catch them on the Family Life Podcast! https://www.familylife.com/familylife-today/ Get healthy together as a couple this Fall! Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
3 Sep 42min
Breaking the Cycle: How to Stop Protest Behaviors from Destroying Your Marriage
Learn how to break destructive protest behavior cycles before they destroy your marriage! In Part 2 of the protest behaviors series, marriage therapy expert Christa Hardin explores why these patterns escalate from mild criticism or withdrawal to explosive fights and emotional shutdown. Discover childhood origins of each Enneagram type's specific protest strategies, from Type 8s who learned vulnerability was dangerous to Type 5s who learned people drain them. Learn general and type-specific ways to create emotional safety that prevents protesting, how to respond during protest episodes to de-escalate rather than inflame, and repair strategies that actually heal after damage occurs. Includes the escalation pattern most couples miss and practical tools for building marriages where direct communication feels safer than protesting. Watch on YouTube! Get healthy together as a couple this Fall! Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Listen to Christa on The Allender Center Podcast here! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
1 Sep 29min
The Hidden Drama: Why Protest Behaviors Sabotage Love
Uncover the hidden drama sabotaging marriages everywhere! Marriage coach Christa explores protest behaviors - the unconscious patterns where spouses criticize, withdraw, create drama, or become passive-aggressive instead of directly communicating their needs. Discover why your partner acts out instead of speaking up through specific protest behaviors for each Enneagram type, from Type 1 criticism when feeling unappreciated to Type 9 passive resistance when feeling unheard. Learn why we protest instead of asking directly (fear, past rejection, learned patterns) and discover the "protest to request" translation guide that ends sabotage and creates real connection. Includes practical solutions for recognizing your own hidden drama patterns and responding to your partner's underlying needs rather than their difficult behavior. Watch on YouTube! Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
27 Aug 13min
From Dropout to Doctorate: A Marriage on a Mission w/Dr. Terence Lester and Cecilia Lester, 8-7 Pairing
Discover an extraordinary journey from gang violence and homelessness to a PhD and community leadership in today's pod! Dr. Terence Lester and his wife, Cecilia Lester share how he went from high school dropout living in his car to earning five degrees and becoming a powerful advocate for educational justice and how they, as a couple, have been helping those with debilitating trauma. This dynamic duo love in motion Type 8/7 marriage reveals how they channel their different energies into founding Love Beyond Walls nonprofit and fighting systemic barriers in education. Based on his book "From Dropout to Doctorate: Breaking the Chains of Educational Injustice," learn how a trauma-informed approach to helping those in dire need can transform lives and communities. How does a busy couple like this stay strong? Learn also how their marriage survives the demands of advocacy work. Perfect for you as you aim to get healthy for yourself and for those who desperately need your combined gifts, too. Watch on YouTube! https://youtu.be/ipNAK9cBy54 Get Terence's brand new book here on Amazon! https://www.amazon.com/Dropout-Doctorate-Breaking-Educational-Injustice/dp/1514011484 Get it on InterVarsity Press (IVP) website: https://www.ivpress.com/from-dropout-to-doctorate?srsltid=AfmBOortg_k40kfA45eBEUoWE_Y1G6TDPvHhpB8ujEL37J4ej6g-jI9H Find Terence 100K+ account here! https://www.instagram.com/imterencelester/?hl=en Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
25 Aug 50min
Creating Weekend Rhythms That Actually Restore You
Transform your weekends from exhausting catch-up time to genuine restoration! Marriage coach Christa explores how to create weekend rhythms that actually renew your energy, strengthen relationships, and feed your soul. Discover why constant stimulation prevents emotional processing and learn practical strategies for restorative movement , delicious slow food pairings, putting good things in your mind, and including something special that's uniquely yours. This episode is perfect for individuals and couples wanting to build stronger marriages through intentional weekend time and families seeking rhythms that restore rather than deplete. From spiritual practices to practical implementation, discover why weekend restoration isn't selfish but strategic for showing up better in all areas of life. Need to get back to school for your relationship? The Enneagram Intensive enrollment is here as we feature Ken and Kathleen who walk us through their favorite parts of it! Want to get healthy together as a couple this Fall? Get early bird rates right here for your personal healing journey in the Enneagram Relationship Intensive with Christa here! Head on over to https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Watch on YouTube here! Instagram: @enneagramandmarriage | Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage Have a specific question? Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
20 Aug 26min
The 5-9 After Your 9-5: Creating Evening Routines That Actually Stick
Transform your evenings with sustainable routines inspired by Benjamin Franklin's daily reflection practice! Here in this fast-listen Fall opener, Christa shares her personal 5-9 routine and Reddit research on how people actually spend their after-work hours. Discover evening frameworks for Head, Heart, and Body types, plus the critical fitness reminder for those on GLP-1 medications (like Ozempic) about preventing muscle loss. Learn about "Goldilocks Hours" - your daily 3.5-hour Sabbath period - and how to create marriage rhythms that support both partners. From morning foundations (prayer, journaling, exercise) to evening connection (6-10 hours weekly for couples), this episode offers practical wisdom for making your after-work hours intentional without being perfectionist. Includes the 7-minute workout app recommendation and insights on work and rest as well! Need to get back to school for your relationship? The Enneagram Intensive enrollment begins back up soon! Details coming Wednesday Head on over to https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: @enneagramandmarriage | Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage Have a specific question? Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
18 Aug 23min
An E + M Vacation Special: The Great European Adventure Audio Diary
Join marriage coach Christa for a delightfully honest audio diary of her European family adventure! From London subway mishaps to finding her great-grandmother's mysterious grave on the Croatian island of Mali Lošinj, this episode captures the beautiful chaos of ambitious travel with heart and humor. Experience the highs and lows of trains through the English countryside to inside of Jane Austen's home where she wrote all of her books, experience Parisian haircut disasters, Venice joys and navigation challenges, and ferry rides to family history. As a 749 tritype with big dreams and bigger heart, Christa shares how travel mishaps became meaningful memories, why following family mysteries across oceans matters, and how adventure can deepen both family bonds and marriage connection. Perfect for anyone who loves travel stories, family legacy exploration, or just needs a good laugh about the reality behind Instagram-perfect vacation posts. Head on over to https://www.enneagramandmarriage.com/ to check out all of our amazing freebies and resources! Instagram: @enneagramandmarriage | Facebook @ enneagramandmarriage Have a specific question? Fill out this form to get your personal questions answered now! Leave us a comment or question by sending an MP4 recording to enneagramandmarriage@gmail.com. (You can use your voice memos app on your phone to record). Love what you're learning on E + M? Make sure you leave us a podcast review so others can find us, too here! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
13 Aug 1h 19min
