Love, Limits, and Delight: What Grace-Based Parenting Really Looks Like :: Cody Kimmel [Ep 546]

Heather MacFadyen, mother of four boys, interviews guests discussing the topic of staying God-centered...both replacing "me" with "He" and remembering we are centered in Him.

19 Mars 201854min

Staying up-to-date on social media can so easily turn into an hour of lost time scrolling on our phones that leaves us discontent and disconnected with the ones we love the most. It’s a struggle most of us deal with in this digital age we’re in, and I’ve brought in my friend Eryn Hall to give us practical tips and encouragement on how to do social media well. My highlight reel is going to look different than someone else’s highlight reel and that’s how it should be. We need to accept that and rest in the Lord. The grace and goodness I have and my acceptance, my identity is found in him and not in someone else’s social media. If limiting your own screen time is something you struggle with, check out the apps in the show notes below to start monitoring your time. Ask a friend or GCM podcast club member to check in with you for accountability. Let’s live our lives for God and for our families first, not just for the social media posts. What we chat about: How to do social media from a Godly worldview Recognizing how social media makes us feel and doing a heart check Learning to rest in God’s approval and not in the approval of social media Stepping away and asking God, “Is this for me?” before responding to a place of potential jealousy Paying attention to whether we are finding our identity in God or in social media Boundaries we’ve put in place on social media Not looking at social media first thing in the morning and starting our day off in prayer so we are secure in who God says we are Healthy switches for spending your time on something other than social media Staying present with your kids with boundaries on your device usage Not immediately posting a picture of an event or activity and checking your “why” behind the photos and posts Be sure of who you are and whose you are before you post A cool story about how someone came to Jesus after reading God’s word on social media Being digital evangelists and staying faithful to the message of who God is Links Mentioned: Moment App for iPhone Quality Time App for Android Declare Conference Liz Griffin Instagram Joy is on the Other Side of the Screen (post Eryn mentioned she wrote)

12 Mars 201851min

Life is full of decisions. We do our best to choose wisely and follow God’s lead. Sometimes God leads us in a different direction. It doesn’t always make “sense” in the moment.  And it definitely isn’t easy to share those changes with others. It’s been over a year since we’ve given you a glimpse behind the scenes. In that time A LOT has happened in our world: new job, school shifts, adopting & “re-homing” a puppy. So I’m bringing my hubby Bruce back on the show to share one concept he’s used at work for years and he has helped me process the last year of change. In this episode Bruce and I let you in on the thought process behind our life choices. Hoping this conversation will allow you grace to change your mind without the fear of what others think. I reserve the right to change my mind and not have to explain it to you, but every person who hears about it wants to know the whole story. What I’ve found is people want to know the should. Every time I talk to a mom, they are feeling this pressure to get it all right, so then when they hear a story that doesn’t work out or where you changed your mind they are trying to analyze the rightness of it. What we chat about: What’s happened in the MacFadyen family in the past year Bruce’s current business, Door Real Estate Brokerage The mantra, “I always reserve the right to change my mind” Making the decision to send one of our sons back to school after a semester of homeschooling What happened with our dog Giving yourself freedom to change your mind Being gracious to others who change their minds Why we need to give our kids and ourselves permission to make mistakes Working to create an environment at home where it’s okay to change your mind and make mistakes In all of the decisions in life it’s about balance and listening to God’s voice Links Mentioned: Bruce and experience doing medical missions with his parents (Ep 5) When Your Husband Has a Demanding Job (Ep 38) Goals, Roles & Superpowers (Ep 112) This is Us (Ep 145)

5 Mars 201845min

It’s not all sunshine and roses in marriage, even when both you and your husband follow Jesus. My guests today share about one of the most painful possibilities in a marriage —infidelity. My friend Jae tells her story of learning her husband had an affair and the work God did in both of their lives to restore their marriage. Licensed professional counselor Cheryl Scruggs shares about her infidelity, divorce, and eventual re-marriage, along with a lot of practical advice and scriptures she learned in the seven years she was separated from her husband. The main takeaway? HOPE. There is hope for your marriage. It’s not easy, because we’re all sinners, but God can heal and restore us when we surrender it all to him. For all of us in marriage, I think it’s important that we are paying attention. In John 10:10 it says that the thief comes kill, steal and destroy, but I have come to give you life and life abundantly. God wants us to have a great marriage, not easy, not perfect. But it’s really understanding we’re both sinners and how are we going to walk this walk together in this relationship as a sinner married to a sinner.  **If you are in a relationship where you or your children have been physically abused, please contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233 or http://www.thehotline.org. What we chat about: Cheryl Scruggs and Jae share their marriage stories. Discovering God’s plans for marriage. Hope for restoration in marriage even after an affair. How do you know if God is asking you to stay in a marriage? Trusting God with your spouse and being open to what he wants to teach you and show you. Understanding our role as a wife God has called you to be. Recognizing the situations where it’s necessary to leave a marriage (physical safety, lifestyle of infidelity). It takes time for healing in marriage. Physical intimacy throughout marriage conflicts. Balancing advice from friends and family with what God wants for your marriage. Biblical roles in marriage. Scriptures Mentioned: Eph. 3:20 – Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us Matthew 19:26 – Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” Deuteronomy 8:1-10 – Be careful to follow every command I am giving you today, so that you may live and increase and may enter and possess the land the Lord promised on oath to your ancestors. Remember how the Lord your God led you all the way in the wilderness these forty years, to humble and test you in order to know what was in your heart, whether or not you would keep his commands… For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land. [read full passage] John 10:10 – The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. Links Mentioned: Hope Matters Marriage Ministry Thriving Beyond Belief Podcast Cheryl and Jeff’s Book, “I Do Again: How We Found a Second Chance at Our Marriage–and You Can Too”** Song of Solomon: God’s Best for Love, Marriage, Sex and Romance DVD**  The Power of a Praying® Wife** The Ripple Effect of Healthy Sexual Connection Francie Winslow Ep 138 Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy?** How to Save Your Marriage Alone**

26 Feb 20181h 6min

We know that God’s word is living and active. Today’s guest Jodie Berndt takes us through using Bible verses as prayers that can powerfully influence your children’s lives. There is so much encouragement in this episode for standing on the truth of God’s word and relying on scripture to help shape your children, teens and adult children. Of course, we as moms can’t help but be changed when we hide his word in our hearts and pray them over our family. We know that he is a loving God who knows our needs and our kids’ needs better than we know them. So when we lift our children to him and surrender them, he’s going to do for them what he knows they need. It might not be necessarily in the timing or the ways that he would’ve ordained, but in Isaiah 55 it says that his ways are higher and better than our ways. When we come to believe that, it can really bring peace to our lives. What we chat about: Using God’s word for prayers is powerful. There isn’t a need we’ll face in parenting that God hasn’t provided for in his word. Specific scriptures to pray for your child’s salvation Asking God what we can nurture and pray for in each child’s unique giftings God will accomplish the changes in your child’s character. Our job is to partner with him. Praying against fear and for protection Asking God to shape your children into good friends Processing popular media with your kids and discussing how it aligns or doesn’t align with a Godly world view The power of having others pray for your kids in community When prayers aren’t answered the way we want, God is still writing their stories. Free resources available at https://jodieberndt.com/resources Scriptures Mentioned: Ephesians 4:29 – Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. John 15:7 – If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. Psalm 121:7-8 – The Lord will keep you from all harm—he will watch over your life; the Lord will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore. Acts 26:18 –  Open their eyes and turn them from darkness to light, and from the power of Satan to God, so that they may receive forgiveness of sins and a place among those who are sanctified by faith in me. 2 Corinthians 5:17 –  Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:[a] The old has gone, the new is here! Colossians 3:12 – Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Philippians 2:13 – for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose. Psalm 91:11 – For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; Proverbs 17:17 – Shape my child into a friend who loves at all times Proverbs 27:17 – As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Proverbs 16:28 – A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends. Links Mentioned: Free resources available at https://jodieberndt.com/resources Praying the Scriptures for Your Children ** Praying the Scriptures for Your Teenagers** Praying the Scriptures for Your Adult Children**

19 Feb 201846min

After 15 years of marriage, Jenn Jett experienced the pain of divorce. But in that place of brokenness, she felt peace that God would redeem and heal her as she said, “Yes” to him.  Listen as she shares her story about how the Lord pursued her, fought for her and surprised her more than she expected with his redeeming love. The Lord called me to himself and said, ‘Your hope does not need to be in the success of your marriage, it needs to be in me.’ We are so motivated by measures of success and we can look at our circumstances and either feel great or responsible and shameful. What we chat about: Jenn’s story of brokeness and pain in marriage and divorce Redefining redemption from God’s perspective Marriage and motherhood can become idols Saying Yes to the things of God can take us on an adventure The importance of community and friends as we process lies we’re believing The power of prayer and learning not to hold back in prayer Healing and restoration is possible even after what feels like a catastrophe The Lord pursues and fights for us through multiple ways Scripture: Isaiah 61 & 62 Finding our identity in Christ is so key before we have a hard life situation “31 Days for Prayer for the Dreamer and Doer“**  Links Mentioned: “Power of the Praying Wife”** Exodus 14:14 Lost Valley Ranch Israel Collective Val Marie Paper –Prayer Journal Enneagram — The Road Back to You** Kat Armstrong — Ep 171 Motherhood, Career & Identity  Camp Well Summit Instagram Camp Well Summit Spring 2018 Red Sea Rules by Robert Morgan** Red Sea Road with Ellie Holcomb

12 Feb 201851min

Get ready for a huge pep talk from one of today’s biggest business personalities, Christy Wright. She shares some of her story and a whole lot of encouragement for women whether you own a business or not. If you struggle with guilt for taking time for yourself or prioritizing your time and saying no, Christy gives wisdom and practical advice to help you reframe your situation and move forward with confidence and kindness. What we chat about: Christy’s story of growing up with a single working mom who owned a business. Letting go of mom guilt and looking at time away from our kids as healthy and necessary. One of the most powerful things you can show your kids is how you take care of yourself. Never say anything about yourself that you don’t want your kids to say about themselves. Getting on the same page with your spouse about taking time away. Decision making paradigm shift and protecting your time. How to say “no” with confidence and kindness. Prioritizing your time around your goals, family and what you enjoy. An honest ‘no’ is better than a dishonest ‘yes’. The imposter syndrome and how it impacts women and high achievers. Take the first step even when you are fearful and it will start momentum to do even bigger things. Making baby steps to move out of a “stuck” place. Questions to ask to help identify your strengths:  What do you enjoy? What is effortless for you? Where do you excel in relation to others? What do others encourage in you? What gives you energy? “Business Boutique”**: Links Mentioned: Propel Conference Christy Wright’s Business Boutique podcast Darkest Hour–Winston Churchill Movie One Day Business Boutique Events

5 Feb 201849min

When she got married, Jamie Ivey became a pastor’s wife. Stepping into this role made her feel there was no one who she could be fully open with about her past. But, keeping these secrets kept her in shame and insecurity. In her new book, If You Only Knew**, she shares how opening up about her past revealed the beauty of God’s grace in her life and about the freedom it has brought her and others. (If you want to hear my “If You Only Knew” story about anxiety and anger, check it out over on Jamie’s “The Happy Hour” podcast.) What we chat about: Jamie Ivey’s story reconciling her past with her Christian walk. How sharing your story can show the beauty of God’s grace and redemption. Examining our underlying motivation for decisions. We are not in control of our kids’ salvation and that is a good thing! How to find a friend who is safe to share your full story with and how to be that type of friend. We can have compassion for the broken when we realize that it’s only by the grace of God we haven’t made bigger mistakes. Bringing discipline with your kids back around to the Gospel because that’s where the freedom lies. The importance of community and allowing others to speak truth into our lives when we fall into places of shame and guilt. God sees the righteousness of Jesus and not our shame when he looks at us. When to tell our kids about our stories and how important it is to talk about sex and places of sin in our homes first. “If You Only Knew” book **: Links Mentioned: Mary Flo Ridley & Megan Michelson — Episode 153– Continuing the Conversation (Birds & Bees) The Birds & Bees, So Help Me Please — Mary Flo Ridley Celebrate Recovery Steps into God’s Grace by Lynn Hoffman** Recovery for Life –Lynn Hoffman Episode 129

29 Jan 201847min