246: My Son is Becoming Sexist. How Do I Stop This?

246: My Son is Becoming Sexist. How Do I Stop This?

It’s not always easy to be a seventh grade boy. Their confidence may be fragile, they tend to lag behind girls in terms of pubertal development, and at school-a place that can feel like it's built for girls- boys may start to feel like they’re falling behind. When that happens, they can become vulnerable to harmful influences and start adopting views–even sexist ones–that can worry parents. In this episode, psychologist Dr. Lisa Damour and journalist Reena Ninan unpack what’s really going on developmentally for boys in early adolescence, and how parents can respond with empathy and understanding instead of fear or frustration. You’ll learn why boys often struggle more in school at this age, how their neurological growth differs from girls’, and what you can do to protect your son’s confidence and values as he grows into himself. 💡 YOU’LL LEARN: - Why seventh-grade boys face unique biological and neurological challenges - How school environments can unintentionally favor girls’ developmental strengths - How figures like Andrew Tate prey on boys’ vulnerability, and what parents can do about it - How to keep communication open and help boys find confidence in healthy ways This episode is a must-watch for any parent of a tween or teen boy who wants to understand what’s really happening beneath the surface — and how to support his growth with empathy and confidence. Follow and subscribe to our YouTube channel where you can see all our latest video episodes: https://youtube.com/@asklisapodcast And follow us on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan. Checkout Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: https://www.goodtroubleproductions.com Episode keywords: boys, puberty, development, self-esteem, sexism, parenting Podcast keywords: ask lisa podcast, dr lisa damour, reena ninan, psychology, podcast, teens, tweens, parenting teens, parenting tweens, teen parenting, tween parenting, parenting tips, parenting advice, positive parenting, parenting podcast, teen behavior, tween challenges, raising tweens, raising teens, parenting hacks, parenting help, family dynamics, kids podcast, mental health, teen mental health, attachment styles, emotional intelligence

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41: How Do I Help My Kid Find Friends Again?

41: How Do I Help My Kid Find Friends Again?

The pandemic has disrupted our kids' social lives. What can parents do to help a child make new friends if they've withdrawn from their peers? How do we help kids who are reluctant to reach out, or who rub their classmates the wrong way? A mom emails about her twelve and a half-year-old daughter who was once an extrovert and now is not. Dr. Lisa explains the five categories that have been identified by research to describe kids' social profiles, and how knowing these categories helps us give children the right kind of support. Should parents try to engineer friendships? Lisa has a strong opinion on this topic while Reena asks how we can help kids find secure friendships as we emerge from Covid-19. BOOKGIVEAWAY: The Science of Making Friends: Helping Socially Challenged Teens and Young Adults; By Elizabeth A. Laugeson, Psy.D. Enter to win a copy from the @asklisapodcast. 1. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and/or LinkedIn @asklisapodcast 2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn) 3. Enter as many times as you'd like 4. For U.S. residents only (Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 5/31/21. Winners will be chosen at random and books will be mailed to the winners. Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Be sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

25 Maj 202130min

40: My Kid’s Room Is a Hot Mess. What Should I Do?

40: My Kid’s Room Is a Hot Mess. What Should I Do?

Should you be concerned if your child has a messy, disorganized room? A mom emails asking for advice on how to handle a kid's room that feels out of control. Dr. Lisa introduces us to the term executive functioning, the mental processes that help with managing oneself and one's possessions. Reena asks if being disorganized as a child can lead to problems down the line. Lisa offers guidance on when it's time to step in and how to help your children organize themselves and their things. BOOK GIVEAWAY Enter to win a copy of How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish. 1. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and/or LinkedIn @asklisapodcast ⁠ 2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn)⁠ 3. Enter as many times as you'd like⁠ 4. For U.S. residents only⁠ ⁠(Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EDT on 5/24/21. Winner will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.) Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Be sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

18 Maj 202127min

39: How Do I Get My Kids to Stop Fighting?

39: How Do I Get My Kids to Stop Fighting?

After more than a year of being stuck at home in a pandemic, it’s no surprise siblings are getting on each other's nerves. Should parents step in - or step back - when kids start fighting? Dr. Lisa tackles this question and also explains how parents' approach to conflict can influence how kids fight with their siblings. Reena asks how parents can keep their cool when heads are getting hot, and whether kids can really learn to manage their own conflicts. Dr. Lisa describes strategies that work having seen them in action during a unique summer job. For Children Everywhere www.giveindia.org Give India helps individuals donate to NGO’s in India helping to fight the Covid-19 outbreak. Send us your questions for our upcoming podcast on talking to kids about race with author Emmanuel Acho. Send questions to asklisa@drlisadamour.com. Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com Follow us on Instagram and Twitter @asklisapodcast See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

11 Maj 202131min

38: How Do I Teach My Kids About Consent?

38: How Do I Teach My Kids About Consent?

Talking to kids about their love lives can be uncomfortable, but discussing consent is one of the most important conversations to have with our children. Dr. Lisa explains why she feels that when we focus on consent, we are articulating the lowest possible bar for acceptable physical intimacy. She offers thoughts on how we might rethink and reframe the entire topic in order to be most helpful to our children. Reena asks: Can we change our collective mindset on consent? And how do you explain coercion and consent to children? The conversation includes a look at how pornography factors into teenagers' understanding of consensual relationships. BOOK GIVEAWAY: One copy each of Girls & Sex and Boys & Sex by Peggy Orenstein Enter to win one of 2 books being given away by @asklisapodcast. 1. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and/or LinkedIn @asklisapodcast 2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn) 3. Enter as many times as you'd like 4. For U.S. residents only (Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 5/10/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.) OTHER RESOURCES: Lisa's articles from the NYT: Talking With Both Daughters and Sons About Sex (1/11/17) Getting ‘Consent’ for Sex Is Too Low a Bar (7/18/18) Why Teenagers Mix Drinking and Sex (11/14/18) See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

4 Maj 202131min

37: How Do I Know If My Child Has an Eating Disorder?

37: How Do I Know If My Child Has an Eating Disorder?

Experts are finding that the pandemic has led to an alarming rise in eating disorders. Dr. Lisa explains how eating disorders can sneak up on families and why they can be incredibly harmful. Lisa and Reena discuss how social media can contribute to eating disorders and the fact that these illnesses affects people from all genders, economic backgrounds, and races. Early intervention matters, so what are the signs of an eating disorder? How do you talk to kids about eating disorders? And when should you seek help? FOR CHILDREN EVERYWHERE: Eating disorders can be linked to food insecurity. Feeding America can help you find your local food bank to make a donation. https://www.feedingamerica.org/find-your-local-foodbank ADDITIONAL RESOURCES: Lisa’s NYT column: Eating Disorders in Teens Have 'Exploded' in the Pandemic anorexiafamily.com Help for parents of children and teens suffering from anorexia and other eating disorders. feast-ed.org F.E.A.S.T. is an international non-profit organization of and for caregivers of loved ones suffering from eating disorders. nationaleatingdisorders.org NEDA supports individuals and families affected by eating disorders, and serves as a catalyst for prevention, cures and access to quality care. maudsleyparents.org Maudsley Parents was created in 2006 by parents who helped their children recover with family-based treatment, to offer hope and help to other families confronting eating disorders.  eatingdisorders.ucsd.edu/resources/ Resources recommended by the Eating Disorders Center for Treatment and Research at University of California, San Diego www.childrenshospital.org/centers-and-services/programs/a-_-e/eating-disorders-program/helpful-links Resources recommended by the Eating Disorders Program at Boston Children’s Hospital https://www.aedweb.org/resources/about-eating-disorders Informational resources developed by the Academy for Eating Disorders https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Be sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

27 Apr 202130min

36: Helping Kids Manage Grief and Loss

36: Helping Kids Manage Grief and Loss

"If the pandemic is about anything, it's about loss,” says Dr. Lisa Damour. Grief can come in different forms - from losing a loved one, to mourning the loss of senior year in high school, to not getting into your favorite college. How can you tell if your child is grieving and what can you do to help? Lisa and Reena examine how to support our kids as they cope with loss. Reena shares how a bouncy castle rented on the morning of her grandfather’s funeral helped her family deal with loss. Lisa discusses insights from Sigmund Freud - written over one hundred years ago - that can be helpful as we find our way through the pandemic. Enter to win one of two copies of "Fall of Freddie the Leaf" being given away by the @asklisapodcast. The book has helped children and adults deal with the mourning process. 1. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and/or LinkedIn @asklisapodcast ⁠ 2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn)⁠ 3. Enter as many times as you'd like⁠ 4. For U.S. residents only⁠ ⁠(Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 4/26/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.) Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com Be sure to follow us on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter @AskLisaPodcast, @LDamour, @ReenaNinan See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

20 Apr 202131min

35: Sexy Social Media. Where Should Parents Draw the Line?

35: Sexy Social Media. Where Should Parents Draw the Line?

How do you talk to kids about social media postings that might cross a line? What's the best way to start a conversation with your sons and daughters about what's too sexy for public consumption? A parent writes to Lisa and Reena about the suggestive TikTok postings her daughter puts up. Lisa explains how to open up lines of communication and the guidance parents might give about posts that could be seen as provocative. Lisa also shares what she is seeing during the pandemic and details why kids post suggestive content at this age. Enter to win one of two copies being given away by the @asklisapodcast of Lisa's fabulous New York Times best-selling book Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls. 1. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and/or LinkedIn @asklisapodcast ⁠ 2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn)⁠ 3. Enter as many times as you'd like⁠ 4. For U.S. residents only⁠ ⁠ (Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 4/19/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.) Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

13 Apr 202130min

34: How to Raise an Adult

34: How to Raise an Adult

How do you prepare kids for life in the real world? Author Julie Lythcott-Haims joins Lisa and Reena for a conversation on the non-academic skills your children need to succeed as they move into young adulthood. Julie spent more than a decade at Stanford University, some of that time as the dean of first-year students. The women talk about how to discuss race with our children, the different chores kids should take on as they age, and the critical importance of having real responsibilities at home. Julie describes the power of positive parenting and talks about her brand-new book Your Turn: How to Be an Adult. Enter to win one of two copies being given away by the @asklisapodcast of Julie’s new book Your Turn: How to Be an Adult. 1. Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, and/or LinkedIn @asklisapodcast ⁠ 2. Tag a friend and leave a comment (on Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn)⁠ 3. Enter as many times as you'd like⁠ 4. For U.S. residents only⁠ ⁠(Give-away is not sponsored or endorsed by Instagram/Facebook/LinkedIn. It will close at 11:59 p.m. EST on 4/12/21. Winners will be chosen at random and will be notified within 24 hours of the end of the give-away. Books will be mailed to the winners.) Additional resources: https://www.drlisadamour.com/ Ask Lisa is produced by: Www.GoodTroubleProductions.com See acast.com/privacy for privacy and opt-out information.

6 Apr 202132min

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