Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

On this episode of Being Well, Rick and Forrest answer questions from listeners. They explore what they’re still working on in their relationship, how we can disengage from obsessive thoughts and old patterns, Rick’s thoughts on psychedelics and how they can be used with discernment, their views on whether human nature is innately cooperative or competitive, and much more. If you’d like to ask a question to be answered on the show, send us an email at contact@beingwellpodcast.com or support us on Patreon. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:10: What do Rick and Forrest still find challenging in their relationship? 8:40: What to do with obsessive thoughts 17:00: What to do when old patterns creep up 26:35: Rick’s thoughts on taking psychedelics with intention outside of therapy 35:05: Respect for indigenous tradition around psychedelic plant use 37:00: Interpretation, discernment, and drugs as telescopes 42:45: Compassionate justice vs. holding and controlling 47:50: How do we get the ideas we have about the world? 53:25: Recap Sponsors: Green Chef makes eating well easy with plans to fit every lifestyle. Order organic, environmentally conscious meal kits at GreenChef.com/beingwell135 and use code beingwell135 to get $135 off across five boxes - and your first box ships free! Access over 30 at-home lab tests from Everlywell, and head to everlywell.com/beingwell for twenty percent off your next test. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

10 Okt 20221h 1min

In 2016 Jason Kander was a rising star in the Democratic Party. After narrowly losing the race to become one of Missouri’s Senators, he began laying the groundwork for a Presidential run. Jason unexpectedly pivoted to declaring his candidacy for the 2019 Kansas City mayoral election, and quickly became the clear favorite. Three months into that campaign he ended his candidacy and stepped back from public life after revealing that he had suffered from PTSD and depression after serving as an intelligence officer in Afghanistan in 2006 and 2007 On today’s episode of Being Well, Jason joins Forrest to talk about his personal journey recovering from PTSD, the impact of his time serving in Afghanistan, imposter syndrome and shame, having a mental health challenge in public, and what we can do to better support veterans.  About our Guest: Jason is a former Missouri Secretary of State and member of the Missouri state legislature. He’s current the President of National Expansion at Veterans Community Project, a non-profit organization dedicated to fighting veteran suicide and homelessness. He’s also the host of Majority 54, a popular political podcast, and the author of Invisible Storm: A Soldier’s Memoir of Politics and PTSD.  If you're in crisis, are thinking about suicide, or are concerned about a loved one, please call 1-800-273-8255. The Lifeline network is available 24/7 across the United States. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:45: Jason’s experience coming to accept having PTSD 3:45: Symptoms 5:50: How the military (mostly doesn't) address PTSD 8:00: Chronic stress, public perception, feelings of failure, and uncertainty of recovery 13:40: Jason’s Veterans Affairs (VA) experience 15:40: Veteran's Community Project and other resources for veterans 20:00: Therapeutic practices Jason did 27:50: Physical sensations associated with PTSD 31:40: Imposter syndrome related to being a combat veteran 33:05: Working through shame and comparison 36:15: How Jason’s view of therapy progressed through the process 42:30: What Jason would do differently for his mental health if he ran for office again 47:05: More on Veterans Community Project and their tiny house program 51:50: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Access over 30 at-home lab tests from Everlywell, and head to everlywell.com/beingwell for twenty percent off your next test. Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

3 Okt 202258min

On the previous episode of Being Well, we talked about how to identify our wants and needs...but identifying our needs is just the first step. After that comes the tricky business of coming to terms with those needs, and communicating them effectively to other people. In this episode, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore best practices for claiming and expressing our needs. This includes how to navigate shame and inhibition, make effective agreements, be considerate of the person on the receiving end of our wants, and become more skillful at negotiation and repair.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:05: Getting real about meeting our needs. 7:10: Suppressing needs due to self-worth challenges 8:35: Patience, making your offering, and tipping points 11:45: Inhibition, and negotiating our needs with other people 15:50: Non-Violent Communication and “Wise Speech” models 26:30: The need for multiple cycles of communication 28:20: Expecting defeat, and two big moments of pain 32:10: Keeping agreements 37:45: Confidence in the ability to repair 39:35: Considering the person on the receiving end of your communication 43:00: Generosity 45:15: Questions to ask when feeling uncertain about how to express a need 49:30: Death by a thousand cuts, and facing discomfort 52:10: Asking others, “What else do you want from me?” 54:30: Recap   Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Listen to Season 2 of Turning Points from Boston Globe Media wherever you get your podcasts! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

26 Sep 20221h 2min

Everyone has needs, but many people find it difficult to identify what authentically matters to them. Even when we can identify them, shame or fear often stops us from expressing those needs to others or taking the practical steps that would help us achieve them. Meeting our needs is a major source of well-being, and people who can identify their needs are more likely to get them met. On today’s episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson focus on how to look inside, and figure out what you really need. They discuss different frameworks for categorizing our needs, what to do when we are confused by our desires, and how to get in touch with what you really want. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:05: Common features among people who struggle to name their desires 7:05: Three basic steps to relate to wants and needs 8:00: Different frameworks for categorizing wants and needs 21:00: What helped Rick get in touch with his own wants and needs? 28:00: An experiential exercise 35:10: Why addressing your needs and wants is not just naval gazing 38:40: Forrest’s suggestions based on his own experience 45:25: What to do when what we want is probably not best for us 51:40: Creating a personal manifesto 54:30: Recap New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

19 Sep 20221h 4min

Renowned physician Dr. Gabor Maté joins Rick and Forrest to explore the many problems for our bodies and minds that arise out of our modern culture, and what we can do to meet our needs, heal ourselves, and become more whole. They discuss our increasing separation from one another, issues with aspects of the medical model, the true nature of addiction, the developmental needs of children, the myth of “normal,” and recovering from traumatic experiences. About Our Guest: Dr. Gabor Maté is one of the world’s leading experts on trauma, addiction, and childhood development. His work has had an enormous impact on how we understand the interactions between our internal world and the world around us, and he is the bestselling author of In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts, Scattered Minds, and his newest book The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness & Healing in a Toxic Culture. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:55: What Gabor means by a toxic culture 4:25: Interpersonal biology - our physiology is modulated by our relationships 7:10: What components are needed for a healthy culture? 11:55: Examples of toxic culture’s impact on people’s behavior 15:20: Addiction 21:00: How and when to distinguish degrees of trauma 27:05: Where and when to express healthy anger 33:10: How turning against the self manifests as illness  36:45: What supports people in returning to their authentic nature? 40:00: Psychedelic-assisted psychotherapy, and creating a sacred context 41:45: Grief, integration, and letting go 44:55: Gabor’s relationship with his children 48:25: Five kinds of compassion, disillusionment, and truth 51:20: Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary? 53:25: Recap New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20. Sponsors: Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

12 Sep 20221h 5min

We all have narcissistic traits. Having some sense of our own specialness isn’t just normal, it’s actually psychologically healthy. The problems start when people go beyond normal levels, and become addicted to feeling special. On this episode, Forrest is joined by Dr. Craig Malkin to explore narcissism and narcissistic traits. They talk about the different forms narcissism takes, the difference between narcissistic traits and narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), red flags, dealing with narcissists, treatment options, and finding the “right amount” of feeling special. About our Guest: Dr. Malkin is a Lecturer in Psychology for Harvard Medical School, a licensed psychologist with several decades of clinical experience, and the author of Rethinking Narcissism: The Secret to Recognizing and Coping with Narcissists. He also has a great YouTube channel.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:35: Narcissism as a pervasive universal trait 4:10: What differentiates healthy narcissism vs. disordered narcissism? 5:45: “Triple E” - exploitation, entitlement, empathy impairments 6:45: Incapable of empathy, or unmotivated? 9:10: What distinguishes having narcissistic traits from having NPD? 13:05: Extraverted, covert, and communal narcissism 23:10: Healthy and unhealthy narcissistic traits often go together 25:20: Insecure attachment 28:30: Emotional hot potato 32:10: Social and cultural power dynamics  36:25: What does healing narcissism look like? 42:55: What modalities do you use in therapy? 45:20: Difficult relationships, communal activation, empathy prompts 50:35: Extinction bursts and using anxiety responses in therapy 53:25: How do you repair with your partner?  57:05: Recap Grief and Loss Workshop: We all face losses in life, from separation and disappointment to shocking, even traumatic events. Join me August 13 and 14 for 7 hours of LIVE, online teaching focused on learning simple, powerful practices that help us come to terms with loss, heal, and find happiness again. Use coupon code BEINGWELL25 at checkout for an additional 25% off the registration price. Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: Bombas designed their socks, shirts, and underwear to be the clothes you can’t wait to put on every day. Visit bombas.com/beingwell and use code beingwell for 20% off.  Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

5 Sep 20221h 8min

We all experience big, difficult feelings, from common emotions like uncertainty, anger, despair, and regret, to difficult experiences like the pains of comparison, burnout, and perfectionism. On today’s episode of Being Well Podcast, Forrest is joined by the wonderful author, coach, and content creator Mollie West Duffy to explore how we can accept those big feelings, learn to live alongside them, and develop tools that help us deal with them more effectively. About Our Guest: Mollie is an expert in organizational design, development, and leadership who has helped advise and coach executives and founders at companies including Google, Casper, and LinkedIn. She’s the co-author of the bestselling book No Hard Feelings: The Secret Power of Embracing Emotions at Work, and the recently released Big Feelings: How To Be Okay When Things Are Not Okay, and is also one half of the Instagram account, @lizandmollie.  Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 1:30: Why is Mollie’s new book called Big Feelings? 5:10: The useful flip side 6:45: How Mollie’s relationship to anger changed during the creation of this book 9:20: Difficult emotions as a resource and source of regulation 11:30: Unhelpful myths in how to deal with difficult emotions 16:45: Healthy responses to those myths 21:10: Vulnerability 25:50: Emotional granularity 27:05: Lengthening the time between trigger and response 30:05: Processing anxiety 35:25: How to relax the desire for control 41:45: Medication 44:10: Anxiety doesn’t accurately reflect risk 46:40: Burnout - even around things you enjoy 55:25: Comparing our suffering with others 57:05: Comparing our accomplishments with others 1:01:35: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

29 Aug 20221h 11min

Receiving a diagnosis can be emotionally challenging, and leave a person with a lot of understandable questions: What does this mean? What do I do now? How do I relate to this? On this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson explore what a diagnosis is, how the diagnostic process works, the limitations of diagnosing someone, dealing with the emotions that come up, and how we can better think about and relate to receiving a diagnosis. Throughout the conversation they focus on how we can come to understand ourselves better, and be liberated by that understanding rather than burdened by it. ADHD is used a number of times during this conversation as an example, so if you have an ADHD diagnosis this episode could be particularly interesting. Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube. Key Topics: 0:00: Introduction 2:55: What is a diagnosis, and what is the process used to give a diagnosis? 6:50: What is the purpose of diagnosing someone? 8:50: Situating what defines pathology within our evolutionary and cultural context 11:40: Origins of mental health conditions, social environment, and privilege 14:40: How diagnosis done, and differentiating between different diagnoses 25:05: More discussion on environmental and cultural effects 31:10: Three subtypes of ADHD 33:00: The emotional complexity of receiving a diagnosis 42:30: What helps people in working through the emotions that come up? 46:35: Paying attention to your emotional experience as much as solving your problem. 49:35: Mental health awareness, resources, and support from others 51:00: Rick’s response when someone is given a diagnosis 58:50: Recap Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link. Sponsors: MDbio is a plant-based medicine company with natural products that address sleep, anxiety, pain, and immunity. Get your FREE 10-count sample pack by going to mdbiowellness.com and entering the promo code BEINGWELL at checkout! Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month! Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription. Ready to shake up your protein Ritual? Being Well listeners get 10% off during your first 3 months at ritual.com/WELL. Connect with the show: Subscribe on iTunes Follow Forrest on YouTube Follow us on Instagram Follow Forrest on Instagram Follow Rick on Facebook Follow Forrest on Facebook Visit Forrest's website Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

22 Aug 20221h 7min